GROUND CONTROL TO MAJOR HARRIS
So it was about 11 p.m. last night and I was talking to my favorite married couple under 41 years old (over 41, it's my parents), Mike and Katie McCollow. And suddenly it hit me: "Mike," I said, "I just realized that all day long I've only spoken to two people face-to-face. And here's the weird thing. The two people are Tom Zbikowski and Brady Quinn. And it was at a press conference."
I believe Katie said something like, "How sad", and I remarked that it was worse because in my brief face-to-face time with other humans, I'd asked Brady a dumb question. But jeez, those pressers (as they're known) can be so all about letting your peers know you're not as dumb as you look (in my case, an easy task). Seriously, though, those things are just too tense.
I thought, What if I were just given the mic next time BQQB is sitting at the table, and I say, "Knock knock"?
Would BQQB reply with a "Hunh?", or with a "Who's there?" I doubt we'll ever find out.
By the way, Katie came up with a great new sniglet (newly coined terms for situations that no currently existing English word adequately describes) the other night. She and Mike were out to dinner in Minneapolis, which was convenient, since that's where they live. And, well, I'll let Katie explain: "You know that moment when you're at a restaurant and you see the waiter or waitress coming out with your dinner, and you're excited cuz it's finally coming, but you act like it's no big deal?"
Uh-huh.
"Entree-cipation."
Genius. That Katie McCollow, she's whipsmart she is. You can check out her blog (yuckysaladwithbones.com) whenever you want.
PENT-UP TESTOSTERONE ALERT
Don't know if you've seen this yet, but it was sent to me by our Notre Dame producer at NBCSports.com, Matthew Waxman. Anyway, I look at it as just another example of why:
1) Rudy should never have been made, and
2) The "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy is so hypocritical
http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/?p=2751
Upcoming ND Dates To Set Your Watch By
October 27th....Brady Quinn turns 22
October 28th....Notre Dame plays Navy on CBS, which I mention because....
October 29th....Charlie Weis is profiled on "Sixty Minutes" on CBS
More Canes Stuff
In the wake of the piece I wrote last week about "The U", a.k.a., the University of Miami, Ken, an ardent Hurricane supporter, has written me a couple of times. Ken and I have struck up a decent pen-palship, as it were, and if you read the top of this blog you know it ain't as if I'm burdened by too many face-to-face meetings at the moment anyway (that would be Track 2 on "Outlandos d'Amour" if you're scoring at home), so it's been fun conversing with him.
Ken, I don't think he'd mind me saying, is a little chapped about how the media keeps dogging Miami about the brawl two weeks ago while, relatively speaking, we left the skirmish between Holy Cross and Dartmouth alone.
I know there are some people I'll never convince, so I won't try. But here's what I told Ken. Let's say your teenaged son is a straight A student, model kid, and always home before curfew (his nickname among his friends is "Designated Dork"). And one night, maybe on his 18th birthday, he comes home drunk and vomits in the toilet. And you know it's never going to happen again. As a parent, I think you'd be lacking a sense of humor if you didn't find that isolated incident somewhat comical.
Now, let's say your son starts coming home every night drunk. And late. And with a girl named Candi. Or a guy named Candi. Suddenly, it's not so funny any more. Suddenly, you gotta face the problem. Does that make any sense?
But the other thing that bothered me about the Miami brawl is that for far too many young men playing college football, it's more about saving face than winning the game. It's more about humiliating your opponent than helping your team.
Because of the job I have, I only get to see Notre Dame play in person on Saturday and the rest of the sport comes filtered to me through Rece Davis-colored glasses (and I love the job Rece does, by the way). Last Saturday after Notre Dame beat UCLA, I trailed no more than a couple steps behind Jeff Samardzija for the first three or so minutes after the clock went to 00:00. It was amazing. Shark was either silent or accepting congratulations from teammates or respectfully shaking hands or embracing those Bruins who had the class to greet him.
Shark didn't make a throat-slash gesture, or rush to plant a flag, or pop his jersey or any such thing. He shared the moment with his teammates gracefully (although I believe that he has taken out a restraining order on me).
I don't pretend to delude myself that football players are angels, not Notre Dame's or anyone else's. Hell, when someone asked Shark two days ago about the Kenny Rogers' pine tar hullabaloo, he chuckled and said, "If you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'." (Shark rules, by the way).
To me the most indelible image of 2006 not involving an actual play is that of three Michigan State players, their team having just squandered a 16-point 4th quarter lead against Notre Dame, guarding the "S" at midfield of Spartan Stadium against potential flag planters. That was the moment I felt like Mr. Hand and saw everyone in college as Spicoli, and the saddest part is realizing most college students have no idea whom I'm talking about.
Recommended Reading
If, like me, you disagree with my good friend Mark Beech's mantra that "pop culture is garbage", then I recommend reading Chuck Klosterman's new book entitled "Klosterman IV: A Decade of Curious People and Dangerous Ideas". It's essentially an anthology of his best magazine articles of the past decade but excuse me, I haven't been subscribing to Spin the past ten years. One of my favorite pieces of his is one on all-girl rock tribute bands that play heavy-metal, or "cock rock". Did you know that there's a band named Lez Zeppelin? AC/DShe? Cheap Chick? It seems that you cannot be a distaff cock-rock tribute band unless you can land a good pun as well.
I don't know if the following female tribute bands exist, but I already have names for them:
Twisted Sisters
U2erus
Girl Jam
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About this blog
NBCSports.com's John Walters goes into the world of college sports and well beyond. From Notre Dame to the latest in pop culture, JDub tackles it all.
Rich Hall has nothing on Katie McCollow. That said, five greatest Sniglets ever:
5. Dashblast: Painful sudden change in volume when ejecting a CD and having the radio come on.
4. Pielibrium: Point at which a piece of pie's crust outweighs its filling, toppling it backward.
3t. Potentater/minutater: Respectively, the largest and smallest fries within a given portion.
2. Musquirt: When you forget to shake a squeeze bottle of French's, this is what comes out first.
1. Essoasso: Anybody that cuts through a corner gas station to avoid a long light.
I am partial to the following French Fries and burgers related Sniglets (and i paraphrase):
1. Defreciation-stealing an equal amount of fries from everyone's bag when you are the one sent to drive to get the fast food order
2. Bagglers - the hard to pick up stragglers of french fries in the bottom of a bag.
3. Bar-b-flow - the smoke that blows right into your face regardless of where you stand when you are grilling.