PANTS LABYRINTH

"Jew Really Say That?"

You've probably read about the Sean Salisbury fuss by now. TV pundits are analyzing audio of a recent appearance of his on ESPN to determine whether or not he used the term "Jew" as a pejorative verb. I don't know (or care) whether he did or not, but I am reminded of that scene in Annie Hall in which Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) suspects that one of Annie's relatives is anti-Semitic because of the way she asks, "Did you?" She made it sound like, "Jew". So here we are more than thirty years later, and that scene is playing out in real life.

Maui Fever Pitch

Speaking of Annie Hall , there's another great line in which Singer says that in California "they don't throw their garbabe away. They turn it into TV shows."

Which brings us to MTV's latest shot at accelerating our race toward destroying civilization, "Maui Fever". Have you seen this yet? It's a reality show about beautiful college-aged types who live in Maui and never have anything to do but hook up and/or make one another jealous. Oh, and use people.

Let me make this clear: I am not a concerned parent. I am not a parent. And I am not all that concerned. But you wonder whether the people who decide what airs on MTV are any better than pornographers most of the time. Maybe they'll give me the seed money to produce "Pants Labyrinth."

Nash Ville

Last night I wrote a piece, a hagiography if you will (or even if you won't), on Phoenix Sun Steve Nash. What I forgot to include was a conversation-slash-revelation I had while talking to our NBA producer Sam Hoffstetter. Basically it is this. Go to any college game, no matter how small the division. NCAA. NAIA, I don't care. Now in that game I bet that you can find at least one player, regardless of race, who is at least the same size as Nash. Most teams have someone who is as fast from baseline to baseline as Nash. And most have a guy who, unlike Nash, will dunk in a game.

And that is why to me Steve Nash is, as I told Sam, a miracle. Because not only is a guy like him playing in the NBA, but he is excelling at a historic pace. And it's not just his stats, it is what his team is doing thanks in large part to his play and his demeanor.

On the night before I watched the Suns face the Knicks, I watched winless Iona face Fairfield. These are low-rung NCAA D-I programs. Fairfield's point guard, Jonathan Han dunked and was quick. He was only about 6'0'. But, and this is no slight to him, he never made a pass or found an open man the way Nash does.

And here's the final point: Nash does this every game against the world's very best athletes, with the longest arms and the quickest reflexes. Yes, it helps to have Amare Stoudemire and Shawn Marion atching your passes and turning them into bunnies, but isn't it incredible that point guards who appear to be blessed with the same physical gifts as Nash cannot replicate what he does against inferior competition. Watching a contest such as Iona-Fairfield only illustrated even more to me how special Nash is.

By the way, Fairfield had a really nice off guard by the name of Michael Van Schaick. I wouldn't call him NBA material, but he was the kind of player that every coach dreams about having on his team. Great shooter, moves well without the ball, and makes smart play after smart play. Just a pleasure to watch.