September 2007 Archives

The Pepsi Max commercial where the Wade Phillips yawns on the sideline and let's me see his big flapping pink cow tongue.

Commissioner Roger Goodell...
Brett Favre is one of the greatest players in NFL history. He's so much fun to watch not only because of his talent bit also because of his competitive spirit. He is the only player to win three MVP awards and his consecutive games streak

The Packers are up 10-6 at the break with a two-minute drive sputtering inside the 10. They settled for the field goal. Favre at the break is 14 for 20 for 197 yards and the historic touchdown.

Now it's Chuck Foreman Appreciation Day here. If you never had a chance to see the Vikes when they played outdoors, you never got to see one of those pre-ESPN icons who would only show up in snippets during halftime and postgame highlights spinning, spinning, spinning in the mud and the snow and churning for yards.

Great running back.

Ryan Longwell, a former Packers, has made two second quarter field goals and they've now now scored twice in the second quarter.

It's a pretty entertaining game so far, despite the sluggish scoring.

The move put on by Adrian Peterson on a first-down carry. Bursting through the middle, Peterson gave a shoulder dip/crossover move to Mike McKenzie and went 55 yards before getting hauled down at the Green Bay 32.

With the GB defense chasing Kelly Holcomb all around the pocket, it's going to be an uphill climb to get much through the air for Minnesota, it seems.

The Packers had a chance to fatten their separation just now but tight end Donald Lee just fumbled inside the Minnesota 10 after catching a pass in the seam. The ball was stripped loose by corner Cedric Griffith.

Favre, meanwhile, is on right now.

He's 8 for 9 for 125.

Adrian Peterson has 9 carries for 100.

He's already tied Chuck Foreman's Vikins mark of 100 yard games by a rookie with three in 1973

A message from former TD pass record holder Dan Marino was just played on the big screen.

"If someone was going to break it, I'm glad it was someone like you. for the past 17 years, you've been a credit to the Packers and the NFL," Marino said in part.

Third and 8 at the 16 and Favre gets the record on a slant to Greg Jennings who was singled up. Great play, great read. TD. The number of flashbulbs popping in the Dome at the start of the play was something to watch.

Adrian Peterson is running well and he may have to continue because the Packers goal appears to be to pummel the Vikings receivers. Charles Woodson has a pass interference and an illegal contact penalty already. The latter came on a play when Woodson returned a pick for a score that got waved off.

On the next play, fullback Jeff Dugan fumbled after about a 20-yard reception, blowing up the drive and giving the ball back to the Pack.

Peterson has 22 on four carries so far.

Adrian Peterson is running well and he may have to continue because the Packers goal appears to be to pummel the Vikings receivers. Charles Woodson has a pass interference and an illegal contact penalty already. The latter came on a play when Woodson returned a pick for a score that got waved off.

On the next play, fullback Jeff Dugan fumbled after about a 20-yard reception, blowing up the drive and giving the ball back to the Pack.

Peterson has 22 on four carries so far.

After the defensive hold on Winfield wiped out a Favre pick, the Packers went three and out. This Vikings defense isn't bad. Not at all.

Favre just got picked on a heave downfield on Green Bay's first play from scrimmage but the pick by Darren Sharper got waved off because of a questionable defensive holding call on the Vikes Antoine Winfield.

The Vikings are looking at third-and-10 at their own 44 and Kelly Holcomb just overshot a very open Sidney Rice down the right side. A well-thrown ball would have been a TD. Favre's coming on.

The Metrodome is, to put it nicely, antiquated.

You don't have to look further than the Jumbotron for evidence. It's actually just a Tron. If the rest of the league is using 42 inch HDTVs for the in-stadium experience, the big screen here is a 13-inch black and white.

Ed Hochuli is the referee for today's game. He's rooting for a dozen holding calls in order to best accentuate his bulging forearms.

I understand pro football and the excitement it brings to Sunday. I get the fans dressing up in idiot costumes, the tailgaiting, the rush to set that Fantasy Roster. It's a great thing, pro football. But it's nothing compared to college ball.

From the start of ESPN's College Gameday to that midnight last minute field goal, college games are unpredictable, exciting, heart breaking and ego busting. The underdog has just a good of a chance as any to win. It takes just one game to change a season.

Just ask:
OKLAHOMA
FLORIDA
WEST VIRGINIA
TEXAS
RUTGERS
CLEMSON
PENN STATE
ALABAMA

What a Saturday it was. Now every year there's a guaranteed weekend of the season where we see the mighty fall. This year it seems as if every weekend has had one surprise after another. However, yesterday was Surprise Saturday.

Oklahoma lose to Colordao? No way in hell. Not buying it. That is... until yesterday.

Are you kidding? Texas! Texas! As if UCF wasn't a big enough scare, this one blew up in your face and Kansas State took full advantage of it.

I bet West Virginia won't laugh at the sight of South Florida on the schedule anymore.

Auburn: sweeping in and doing what they do best: beating Florida and ruining a perfect season.

Then there are the ones who managed to sneak by like USC and Wisconsin. They got the win but showed they're far from invincible.

FSU beating Alabama... highlight of the day. Our defense looked so good. They were the factor that allowed us a chance to win the game. Xavier Lee... woah! Consider yourself a fan favorite and I'm backing you as our starting QB any weekend you want. Huge win for Bobby and the boys.

Wonder what that new 25 is gonna look like... See ya next Saturday.

1) Matt Schaub, Texans QB
Back in Atlanta for the first time since leaving in the offseason, Falcons loyalists will have a tough time settling their stomachs watching Schaub beat them while the guy who kept him on the bench -- Mike Vick -- awaits sentencing.

2) Jamal Lewis, Browns RB
He goes against his old team, the Ravens. It doesn't figure to be a real enjoyable day for either Jamal or the Browns.

3) Mark Bulger, Rams QB
If there's any pass defense that can cure what ails a quarterback, it's the Cowboys.

4) Roy Williams, Cowboys S
Williams should add to his first name and hyphenate his last name. Officially change it to Over Roy Williams-Touchdown...

5) Jon Kitna, Lions QB
Might throw for 500 today in the dome against the Bears.

6) Brett Favre, Packers QB
If he doesn't throw 421 today, he can do at home against the Bears on SNF. Innnnteresting.

We're an hour out and say this...Green Bay is well represented in the Metrodome today.

Wide swaths of green and gold and lots of triangular-shaped yellow things perched a top heads of kind souls from the heartland.

Favre just took the field and heard more cheers than boos

DeShawn Wynn is going to start at running back over the injured Brandon Jackson. Vernand Morency, the presumed starter who's been hurt, should get some touches today but isn't starting.

Irish are driving for another socre.

Touchdown, Golden Tate! This kid is UnFREAKINGbelievable!

Irish are within a touchdown.

Gotta go downstairs to the field.

Who knows, we may even have a game. Enjoy the finish.

Finally, a play call any Notre Dame observer can get behind. The Irish, facing 4th-and-5 at their own 37, go for it. Sharpley throws the bomb to Golden Tate, who for the third time in his nascent career is covered like a glove and for the third time makes the catch.

This for a 43-yard gain.

Golden Tate: The new Derrick Mayes. And the best receiver named Golden since the Dallas Cowboys' Golden Richards.

With Sharpley passing, ahem...sharply, the Irish went on a vintage Charlie Weis scoring drive. Plenty of passing and run when we must. Suddenly the O-line is doing its job, the drops are shorter, the routes are crisper, and the chains are moving. Sharpley hit Duval Kamara in the end zone for a 6-yard TD pass, Kamara's first college TD reception (memo to David Grimes: You're now 2nd string).

And only a miserable wretch would flag these Irish for excessive celebration.

Walker again missed the PAT, which is execrable. Kickers and holders don't have that much to do, after all.

Anyway, it's 26-12, Purdue, with 12:38 left. This one's not over. The Irish could use a turnover, but the Boilermakers, who looked so efficient in the first quarter, haven't played with any offensive spark in the second half. Maybe Corwin Brown made some good adjustments. Regardless, it's a different Irish team this half.

Notre Dame is actually outplaying the Mojitos in the second half. The Irish are driving and finding people you've never even heard of before (Duval Kamara? Robby Parris?). Evan Sharpley and Jimmy Clausen are both playing--while Darrin Bragg announces that he's transferring to Northern Illinois--, taking quick drops and hitting receivers running crisp routes. Other items for Notre Dame fans to be positive about today, short of being victorious:

1. Eric Maust is punting the stuffing outta the ball: averaging 47 yards per boot in the first half.
2. Irish QBs have been sacked just once in nearly 30 pass attempts thus far.
3. Duval Kamara is playing as if he's Arrelious Benn....four catches today.
4. Ambrose Wooden broke up a pass (you are not stoned...that's what I said).
5. Erin Andrews is the sideline reporter.

Best sign you'll see this afternoon, from Purdue student section:

RUDY COULD START ON THIS YEAR'S TEAM

Purdue, facing a 3rd-and-9 from its own 11, just converted the first down. Which you expected. But it was the way in which the Mint Juleps did it that led Irish fans to bemoan another chorus of "(Savior's Name)". Painter completed a pass to Dustin Keller, I believe, who was hit immediately by Kyle McCarthy (who's having a good game in the most significant playing time he has yet received). But then Keller carried McCarthy with him for the extra yard he needed.

This game film could very well be gorier than "Eastern Promises", from an Irish perspective.

Glen Hansard's remains the only Irish performance worth touting this week that I've seen.

Zibby just recorded his first interception since the 2005 Navy game. That's a span of twenty games.

On the ensuing possession, the Irish ran the same slant-in play to Duval Kamara twice in a row. Both for first downs. Nicely done. Now Evan Sharpley is in the game. For one play. Am I being hyp-motized!?!

ND has a 4th-and-goal from the Purdue 5. Double-double tight end set. I mean, I think Konrad Reuland re-enrolled to be in on this play. Fake handoff, John Carlson sprints to the right conrerand is wide open. WIIIIIIDE OOOOOOOOOPEN! And Clausen waits...and waits...checks his email....still waiting....finally lofts the ball to Carlson, who makes a tremendously acrobatic catch over two Purdue DBS that needn't have been that acrobatic had Clausen just released it sooner.

But it IS a touchdown, and it's the first TD pass of Clausen's career and the first of the season for the Irish.

Brandon Walker missed the PAT.

As if you're surprised.

You want to hear the really depressing news? The Irish had 132 first-half yards, which I believe may be their most prolific first half, yardage-wise, of the season.

Here's my question, after suffering through two fumbles, an interception, another muffed shotgun snap, three penalties, a blocked field goal, a squandered 3rd-and-29 and a punt that was downed on the 2: Did they have halftime at Little Big Horn?

Commenters say that Arrelious Benn is being talked about on the telecast (I cannot hear it). He has a 90-yard kickoff return for a TD and a 29-yard TD catch. How Benn actually wound up in Champaign is not fully known, but you cannot bust on a kid for zigging when he should have zagged on signing day. The kid, like the school, is only doing what's in his best interests. And often he knows that if he does not verbally commit, a school will pass on him.
A verbal commitment is like a wedding engagement. Until you exchange vows, the engagement isn't binding. Nor should it be.

Inveterate ND fan, alum and Chicago native Ferris (ND '88) writes in to say that he's disgusted with...are you ready for this...Zibby. Says his body language is crap today and he's the most overrated ND player ever. I'm not ready to go that far, but Zibby has been less than his usual self the past few games.

If you're hungering for a Notre Dame victory, here's some good news for you:

Notre Dame High School (Sherman Oaks, Calif.) defeated Saugus, 38-35, last night (and their QB, Dayne Crist, has verbally committed to ND.

Notre Dame Prep's (Scottsdale. Ariz.) junior varsity wiped out Washington Hig'sh (Phoenix)jayvee, 34-8, on Thursday evening. (mentioned because in effect this Irish team is its jayvee unit...it just lacks a varsity squad).

Notre Dame High School (Lawrenceville, N.J.) beat Nottingham (God help them if they're not the Sheriffs) 28-21 in their most recent game.

Notre Dame High (Niles, Illinois) beat St. Viator (Arlington Heights) 26-21.

Feel free to phone in with your own Notre Dame prep school scores, too. This site needs all the good Notre Dame football news it can get.

Armando Allen, who's putting a new spin on the term "AA Meeting" (except that he wouldn't have a 12-step program because normally he fumbles before that), just put another clip into the 2007 lowlight reel. Clausen hit him on a screen, but he was tackled for a 9-yard loss. But not before fumbling the ball and losing it to Purdue's Anthony Heygood (it was the first fumble that Heygood had "caused" in his four seasons of Appletini football).

We are two minutes shy of halftime and Purdue has already covered the spread. Which was 22 points.

I'm just trying to visualize the p.a. (production assistant) up in Bristol who's putting together the highlight package for today's game. It won't be at all about Curtis Painter's (likely) 400 yards passing and the seven different receivers he hit in the first half. It'll be another Keystone Kops segment on Notre Dame's miscues.

Is it possible to cover the Irish this season without sounding like Debbie Downer? Lord knows I'm trying.

Jimmy Clausen just threw his second bomb of the year to Golden Tate. And Tate just caught his second bomb of the year. The first one, back at Penn State, was negated due to a Sam Young hold (one of ND's more consistent plays this season). This one, a 36-yard gain, brought flags as well, but it was called defensive pass interference. Though it appeared to be offensive.

Anyway, that's two long passes to Tate, jump balls really, that he came up with. Might want to keep that one in the playbook.

With 14:56 to play in the half, Purdue lines up for its first punt.

Zibby calls for a fair catch at about the ten-yard line, then abandons it, as if to fake out the coverage. Ball rolls and is downed at the Notre Dame 2.

So it goes...

(A note to my [ever-diminishing] group of friends who phone me to discuss Notre Dame football while the game is going on . I work on Saturdays. Covering college football. Thanks for thinking of me, but there might be better times to phone. Just sayin'...)

Purdue, facing 3rd-and-29 following Notre Dame's two best defensive plays of the season. And there is not a Notre Dame fan alive who did not know was coming next. Exactly. A "go" route up the right sideline, complete to Greg Orton for a 40-yard gain. Honestly, if you'd allowed me to bet on that one, I'd have taken the Sakebombers getting the first down.

We've seen this all before.

On the plus-side for Irish fans: Jimmy Clausen is 4-5 passing and has not been touched yet. Nice job, Irish O-line.

**************

Notre Dame played plenty of nickel and dime packages in the first quarter, which is fine. But if you give a passer such as Curtis Painter time to throw, it doesn't matter if you have Susan B. Anthony dollar packages. He'll pick you apart. I'd like to see the Irish rush seven and play man and just let the fur fly. Could it be any worse?

Purdue scored a touchdown on a 10-yard Curtis Painter-to-Dustin Keller pass on its opening possession. Then it didn't. The Irish got a reprieve when the Highballs were flagged for an illegal shift. Purdue settled for a field goal.

Then again, the Irish had originally stopped the Carbombs fifty yards back, on a nice 3rd-and-short tackle behind the line of scrimmage. But Kerry Neal, who is no relation to my good buddy Kelly Neal, who is now better known as ESPN field reporter Kelly Naqi, jumped offside, negating the stop.

So here comes Notre Dame's first offensive drive.

And, for those of you who wonder who plays on ND's kickoff and kickoff receiving teams, I've done the legwork for you:

Kickoff Unit (Left to Right)

Terrail Lambert
Sergio Brown
Junior Jabbie
Steve Quinn
Mike Ragone
Brandon Walker (K)
Nikolas Rodriguez
Travis Thomas
David Bruton
Kyle McCarthy
Ambrose Wooden

Kickoff Coverage Team

Front Line:

McCarthy
Duval Kamara
Thomas
Brandon Erickson (or Leonard Gordon)...both wear 24
Ragone

Second Line:

Luke Schmidt
Will Yeatman

Third Line:

Robert Hughes
Asaph Schwapp

Back Line:

Junior Jabbie
Armando Allen

No idea where they're hiding Golden Tate.

Also, Eric "I'm Not Ralph" Maust is punting for the Irish this afternoon.

Up in the pressbox, watching Purdue rip off consecutive 20-yard gains (the first on a pass, the second on a run), we're discussing which stage of Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's five stages of terminal illness we're at. You know: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. A colleague said he's at the "Acceptance" point whereas I countered that I'd already passed that and come all the way back around to "Denial".

Curtis Painter has more time to throw than Rex Grossman had to prove himself in Chicago. Which is a lot.

The fun thing about being playing defense for Notre Dame? You do see a lot of playing time.

The Irish need some big-ass linemen (the politically incorrect Domer in me would wonder when they'll hold tryouts at St. Mary's)

10-0, Purdue, on Kory Sheets' one-yard drive.

Some lineup notes for you. Don't faint, I'm giving you actual football information.

--Travis Thomas is listed as the starting halfback for the Irish this afternoon. James Aldridge is behind him. Also, Justin Brown will be starting at defensive end. He was injured last week. (Update: John Heisler just informed us that Aldridge will start at halfback and that Justin Brown did not make the trip to WeLaf; Derrell Hand will likely start; also, for offensive line groupies, Chris Stewart and Dan Wenger did not make the trip).

--Today's question: If Demetrius Jones shows up, will he wear his Notre Dame blue home jersey (since he wore the white one in South Bend last Saturday) or will he go with a Cincinnati Bearcats jersey? And what beach in SoCal do you think Konrad Reuland is hanging out on today, saying to himself, Now this is the life.

--My editor, DieBarryDie, asks me if I know who the two quarterbacks drafted ahead of Brett Favre in 1991 were. Here are the hints. Both come from California schools. One has iconic status and the other has a brother in another sport who is far more famous (and infamous) than he. Answers below:

(Second blog entry of the day...go down and read the first...I actually tried on that one)

--This just in: Charlie Weis is sitting Jimmy Clausen this afternoon in favor of Brianna Scurry. "If we lose with Brianna under center," Weis told me as the Irish got off the team bus, "I can live with that."

--If I were an NFL commentator last weekend, I would have waited until we showed the highlights of Philadelphia's 56-21 victory over Detroit, then said, "I can't help thinking that the Eagles would have put up 70 if only they had a white quarterback."

--An item I forgot to mention from last Friday's pep rally at Notre Dame. When the Notre Dame marching band makes its entrance, they don't wear their band uniforms. Instead, each secction of the bands (e.g., trumpets, percussion, etc.) comes in dressed in its own homemade fashion. Last week, for example, one group came in wearing nothing but blazers (minus shirt sleeves) and boxer shorts. I checked carefully--just once--and there was nothing on under the boxers. Just boxers, in front of 8,000 people. Which could be potentially embarrassing. But, considering what subdivision of the band that it happened to be, I thought it was hilarious. Because it was the woodwinds .

--Everlasting blogstalker G.A. covers South Florida for the St. Petersburg Times, so he must have been at the Bulls' game against West Virginia last night. The biggest game in USF history. Hopefully, he'll send us a first-person account on the blog that is guaranteed to amp up the funny of what you're reading.

--A get-well-soon to Johntourager L.A. , who tore her MCL and meniscus on Thursday. Listen to this. She hurt herself when she was attempting to place a band-aid on her foot, with the foot up on the bathroom counter. The other leg, supporting all her weight, buckled and then came the searing white-hot pain. Just consider the irony: suffering a debilitating injury while trying to put on a band-aid.

--If you get the chance, read Tim Layden's take on Mike Gundy on SI.com. My friend and former colleague makes the brilliant point of wondering why Gundy had to add "...of children" to his "must not be a mother" rant. "A mother...of children?" As opposed to...
Reminds me of the scene in "Airplane!"--yes, the day's second reference to that film, and don't call me Shirley (that's 3)-- in which the mother confides to flight attendant Lorna Patterson (who's unmarried) that she's scared to death of the plane crashing, but "at least I have a husband."

--I'm having a good hair day. Just thought I'd mention it.

--Will Perdue...did not attend Purdue. Which is just too bad. But Drew Brees did, and I note that because Brees, now with the New Orleans Saints, wears the same colors in the NFL that he did in college (black-and-gold). Can you think of another prominent NFL player who does that?

--I sat in the lovely Ross-Ade press box media dining room (again, not being facetious; there's a panoramic view to the north, and it's another lovely midwestern autumn day) at a table with K-9 unit police officers. Great guys. They spent the past four hours sweeping the stadium for potential explosive devices. One of them gave me the following advice as I bid them goodbye: "If you see us running...catch up."

--Watching the Mets lose their fifth in a row last night, I cannot help but go back to their Tuesday night game with the Nationals. Down 10-3 entering the bottom of the 9th, the Mets scored six runs and had the tying run on 2nd base with one out. They lost, with the tying run stranded at 3rd. It didn't seem like such a huge loss at the time, but I believe that if they'd have come back and won that night, they'd have been so loose the rest of the week that the N.L. East would already be theirs by now. As it is, the Mets have to win today and tomorrow and need the Phillies to lose once just to get in. Unreal.

--By the way, my seat in the Purdue press box is higher (by maybe a multiple of two) than my United Airline flight was when we aborted our landing yesterday (see earlier entry). Did I mentioned that I was pissed off about that?

Greetings from gorgeous West Lafayette , Indiana, and I am not being facetious. It is a perfect Indian Summer day here in "The Crossroads of America", as Indiana now bills itself. Couldn't be any more sublime, weather-wise.

And the buzzword today is, "Purdueable". Is beating the Boilermakers Purdueable for Notre Dame? By the way, I'll be making bad puns such as that all afternoon--why should today be any different?--so get ready for "Purduezy", "Purduefuses", "Purduebage", "Purdueteronomy" (if the game is a blowout of biblical proportions) and, should the Boilermakers rush on first, second, and third down in one series (which they won't), "Purdue-run-run-run, babe, Purdue-run-run".

Anyhoo, one name, one image keeps popping up in my mind as I try to analyze today's contest: James Aldridge . The Fighting Irish sophomore had a breakout game--more like a breakout first half-- last Saturday, rushing for 104 yards. His 43-yarder was the longest run by an Irish running back (not including BQQB's 60-yard scramble, but he was a quarterback, nor Travis Thomas's punt-fake last season) since Julius Jones in 2003. Read that again.

If Aldridge can be effective, the Irish can win. And today may be his coming out party. Aldridge grew up in Merrillville, Indiana, which is 82 miles north of this stadium and 72 miles west of Notre Dame. Now, I don't wanna get all "Mary Jane's Last Dance" on y'all, but he grew up in an Indiana town...oh my my, oh hell yes. So he may be fired up for today's contest, and that may give the Irish, who are 22-point dogs, a chance in today's game.

By the way, how fired up am I for the noon start? VERY. I wish every game I covered kicked off at noon. And believe me, if I had any pull with the peacock (note to G.A.: apparently, the censor will allow you to type "pull" within four words of "peacock" without blocking your post), we'd end those 3:30 p.m. starts and go with nooners. You can always tailgate afterward.

Quiz Question: How does Notre Dame's backfield remind you of the station owner from "NewsRadio"? (answer at the bottom of the blog)

Children of the Cornhole

I just wandered through the pay parking lots (only $10, a bargain) on the intramural fields to arrive here at Ross-Ade Stadium. It's Cornhole Nation out there. I passed no fewer than two dozen cornhole sets out there--the sport is thisclose to having its own televised tourney on "The Ocho". Here's what I don't understand, though. With all the care and creativity that Cornholers put into the design of the faces of their cornhole boards--I just saw everything from the Purdue insignia to the American flag to an ND shamrock design-- anyway, with all the effort undertaken in that endeavor, here's my question: How come I've yet to come across a Cornhole board with a rendering of Cornholio on it?

What's up with that? Cornholio! The classic alter-ego of Beavis. "I need some tee-pee for my bunghole!" If you or anyone you know has a Cornhole board with Cornholio on its face (which should include that catchphrase somewhere), drop us a line here at RumiNation.

Do you remember the first time you saw the Cornholio episode on "Beavis & Butthead"? Did you wonder, as I did, "What was Mike Judge on when he wrote that?"

Cornholio belongs in an all-time Top Five of "What Were They On?" comedy skits. These aren't necessarily the funniest comic pieces of all time (though all of the five I'll include here are classics, at least to me), just the ones that leave you scratching your head as to how they ever even developed the concept. Here are five that come immediately to mind:

1. "Cornholio"....Beavis & Butthead
2. "Porcupine Raceway".....The State
--an over-the-top sendup of dumb musical ideas that even the performers on this '90s comedy show admitted, before airing it, that the suits at MTV were nervous about allowing it to air because they simply didn't understand it.
3. "More Cowbell".....Saturday Night Live
--we've all seen it, but how many hundreds of times had you listened to BOC's "The Reaper" and never wondered about the cowbell?
4. "Gil Fischer, The Fishin' Musician".....SCTV
--What if you combined a Saturday morning fishing show with American Bandstand? The answer was this show, with the late John Candy as your host. In the shadows of my mind I seem to recall Chrissy Hynde and the Pretenders out on a boat casting for trout with Candy. I'm chuckling just thinking about it.
5. "The Hamlet Musical".....Gilligan's Island
--Granted, it must have been difficult to keep coming up with fresh ideas if you were writing for "Gilligan's Island", particularly since apparently none of the seven castaways had sex. So one day they decided to let the characters travel in time, and to perform Hamlet, and then to make it a musical. Does anyone else remember Gilligan crooning, "It is to be/Or not to be/that is the question that I ask of me?"

PICK 'EM UP

Brian Leonard.

Rutgers star is getting the start this week due to Steven Jackson being hurt. Leonard couldn't be nicer as a person. I know that doesn't count in football games. It does however, make it easier to root for the guy.

Speaking of rooting for, if any of you happen to think about it on Saturday, keep your fingers crossed for my Noles as they take on Alabama in Jacksonville, Fla.

Nick Saban is doing some good things at 'Bama. They barely lost to Georgia last week in overtime and knocked off Arkansas the week before. We beat Colorado and luckily had an off week giving us a little extra time to prepare for this game.

Now a question that many articles have been trying to answer this week: What if 'Bama would've hired Bobby?
At one time, that was not only a consideration but for some a given.

Here are two of the many articles that have brought the question back up in anticipation of the game and team many at one point thought was to be Bobby's.

What If...1987?

Best Thing That Never Happened

I really hope you held out over the weekend and kept Donovan McNabb.

As hard as it was to remain optimistic, it goes back to the old saying: "Good things come to those who wait." Now, I didn't want to wait a whole season, however, Sunday our boy brought the goods.

I actually had a trade offer come in twice last week. It basically offered me Peyton Manning and Ronnie Brown for Willie Parker and Anquan Boldin. I needed a QB seeing as how my backup is Matt Leinart. Exactly. But I wanted to give McNabb one more shot.

THANK. YOU. EAGLES. For finally getting in the game and playing like it matters.

Don't do it just yet, but Brandon Jacobs is on his way back from that Week 1 injury. They hype begins... again. (My little brother is still mad at me for making him draft Jacobs early. Sorry Boo.)

Michael Vick still hitting the pipe.

I leave you with GREGG and his WAIVER WIRED column. The greatest source to answer all your ?'s.

Thursday.

Definitely Top 3 in the "best day of the week" category. Why you ask? Cause it represents the very thing you've been waiting for all week: the start to the weekend.

Friday, no one really accomplishes that much in the office (let's be honest, this is usually due to the fact people were out celebrating the upcoming weekend the night before). Saturday and Sunday are filled with freedom, shopping and sports. (Unless you work on the Fantasy Fix...which includes working on Sunday. No bitterness.)

So really, Thursday is the day it all begins. Know what else begins on Thursday?

SEASON FOUR OF THE OFFICE. That's right. And to get you just in the mood, here is a little clip. Let's take a step back in time, to one particular basketball game. If you don't laugh at this then our friendship has run its course. Stanley's dribble alone is worth it. The "Secret Weapon" begins around 3:15.

"When I am playing hoops, all of the stress and responsibility of my job here just melts away. It's gone, I'm in the zone. Who am I? Am I Michael Scott? I don't know. I might just be a basketball machine."
-Michael Scott.

Watch it. Just another reason to love Thursday.

Last week in RumiNation, I took someone to task. Me.

Last week? Wag of the finger to me for my half-fast Rutgers reporting. This week, a pat on the back because I was one of those New York-based writers who didn't pour a shovel-ful of dirt on the New York Yankees earlier this season.

If you check out the Archives--as if you really have time-- you'll see that in my July 11 entry I wrote, "I"m going to go out on a limb here and say that the Yankees will make the playoffs." New York was 42-43 at the time. I elaborated on the reasons, but the strange thing is that, as any inveterated Yankee observer will agree, New York finally acted like a shrewd, small-market team this summer (post July 4th) and not like the Richie Rich I-wanna-new-bike-this-one's-got-dirt-on-it kids they have in the past.

To wit:

1) The Jankees thought long-term. They didn't trade away their future (Ian Kennedy, Joba Chamberlain, Phil Hughes, etc) at the trading deadline for some short-term suck job (Jeff Weaver comes to mind) whose personality wouldn't meld in the clubhouse.

2) The Jankees realized that any team, from a corporate teams to theirs, needs a mix of youth and experience. I finally believed that the Janks would make the playoffs way back in mid-July when Shelley Duncan arrived and started unleashing his high-fives of fury in the duguout. It wasn't that Duncan was going to be the reincarnation of Shane Spencer (and doesn't "reincarnation" sound like an N.L. shortstop?), but his enthusiasm would rub off on the millionaires around the clubhouse.
Last year New York also started out slowly, had to deal with injuries to a number of position players, but somehow battled back. And I liked the team Joe Torre had in late August of '06. But then Gary Sheffield returned and, as valuable as his bat was, you could just see the vif and vim depart from the lineup. The Yankees were not loose, and when the Yanks aren't loose, A-Rod blows. And that's not good. And suddenly they were out of the ALDS by Saturday afternoon last season.

3. This cannot be attributed to the front office so much, but the Yankee starters have--unlike the first two months of the season--not put the offense in the hole the last two months. In April and May it seemed as if every time you tuned into a Jankee game in the 4th inning, it was 5-1, Blue Jays. Well, guess what? Last night a Yankee starter (Chien-Ming Wang) allowed a home run to Devil Ray batter Carlos Pena. It was the first homer a Yankee starter had allowed in 110 innings.

Will the Yankees win the World Series? I dunno. But from a talent basis and a chemistry basis, this is the most promising pinstripe squad since 2001. Opening Day seems a lifetime ago. All you need to do to see how much this team has transformed in six months is to remember that New York's opening day pitcher was Carl Pavano .
I only wish Scott Proctor were still around to share in the experience. Nobody gave up more for the Yanks the last two seasons than that guy--even if he isn't as good as Chamberlain, but who is?

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Two more thoughts on an earlier blog this week, concerning whether Notre Dame should relax its admission policies occasionally when a prospect such as Tony Rice or Chris Zorich is available.

1. My buddy Dean, also a former Dillon Hall resident (and we both know the words to the notoriously banned fight song), points out the obvious (because Dean was always effortlessly smarter than the rest of us): It's not as if most of the players on the football team would have gotten into ND on their academic record, anyway. Their national superiority in football got them in, along with grades that were good enough to assuage the minds of Notre Dame's admissions department.
So Dean was basically opposing my point. He's saying that the Irish already do relax admissions standards when it comes to football. It's just a matter of degree.
An aside: Charlie Weis is always one to point out that his players graduate and become doctors and lawyers and investment bankers (he actually uses those professions), and that may be true--technically. But most of those ex-players to whom he refers are walk-ons.
These players aren't at all dumb....anyone who ever spent five minutes with Brady Quinn or Chinedum Ndukwe or Darius Walker or Ryan Harris (etc.) knows they're in the presence of a dude who's smarter than they are (at least that's how I felt....thank God John Sullivan is all I can say...it's a joke!). But if you take the two-deep lineup on ND, I don't know how many of those guys are pre-med. Probably zero. Potential lawyers, probalby many, but how difficult is to become a lawyer nowadays? Have you met some lawyers? I mean... it's still requires more logistical ken than sportswriting, but you don't have to be brilliant.

2. To agree with a past commenter's point, Notre Dame wouldn't be as much fun if it were all 4.0 GPA/1500 SAT kids running around. A good friend of ours once began a theology paper with the sentence, "Moses was a very historic man" (which is true, by the way). And that provided a fair amount of unintentional comedy for the rest of us that week (and decades beyond). You don't wanna mess with that.
And by the way, ND already does have a double-standard (as do many institutions of that rank) when it comes to admissions. It's called "legacies". Students whose parents are alums. If you can be admitted to Notre Dame, or any institution, based on lower academic requirements than other students because the school has a quota of legacies it wants to accept (happy alums are more likely to donate, after all), then you're already admitting that the same standards do not apply to all.
Again, this is a circular argument. We're already copping to the fact that many revenue-sport athletes would not be at Notre Dame (or Duke, or Stanford, or Vanderbilt, or Northwestern) based on their grades alone. So what's my point? I guess it's that if you can sense that a kid is not a troublemaker and that if he's ambitious enough and talented enough, you take a chance on him every once in awhile. And I don't know, maybe Notre Dame already is doing that.

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I'm watching the Women's World Cup semi-final. Brazil leads the U.S.A. 3-0 early in the second half. You think U.S. coach Greg Ryan isn't going to hear it for subbing out Chewbacca's god-daughter in goal for Brianna Scurry. To be fair to Scurry, the first goal was an own-goal that Shep Messing couldn't have prevented (not to mention Deborah Messing). You still have to wonder why you'd mess with your players' chemistry that late in a tournament this important. Especially when Hope Solo had been having a great tournament.

If you watched Marta's goal (how many other world-class athletes are named after a rapid-transit system? MTA? The T?) later in the first half, you have to admire the athleticism of it, as well as the fact that a U.S. defender grabbed her shorts in an attempt to slow her down but could not.

I was lucky enough to attend the Olympic women's soccer final in Athens (Greece '04, not Georgia, '96), which the U.S. won in extra time, 2-1. But if you saw that match, in person and on TV, you saw a Brazil team that was faster and more adept at ball-control. The U.S. team just had so many veterans who knew they were playing their final meaningful international match together (Hamm, Foudy, Chastain, etc.), and they just willed themselves to victory. Not today. Not today.

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This hasn't been reported much, but I have it from two sources that following the birth of Bridget Moynahan's baby boy last month, Eric Mangini complained to NFL officials that Tom Brady had videotaped the delivery. This is getting out of hand.

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Last weekend's college football action pretty much blew, with the exception of the final minutes of Georgia-Alabama and Mike Patrick's all-time non-sequitur concerning Britney Spears' career and life. This weekend, however, there are a trio of intra-conference matchups between 4-0 teams that should be terrific.

1. West Virginia @ South Florida Friday night, ESPN2

This was one of the shockers of 2006, the Incredi Bulls going into Morgantown and stuffing a moribund Mountaineer outfit. As we've said before--as have others--the true test of a good team is being able to go into someone else's backyard and win (see: the entire Big East, 2006). I like West Virginia in this one simply because they're alert about who USF is and they have more speed. Steve Slaton and Pat White will not be napping Friday night in Tampa. Mountaineers win. Maybe even big.

2. Michigan State @ Wisconsin Saturday, 3:30 p.m., ABC

Michigan State at Wisconsin pits the two best young coaches in the Big Ten. I really like Mark Dantonio (second on my list of Best Coaches Named Dantonio, behind Mike of the Phoenix Suns) and what he's doing with the Spartans, and so I like Sparty to pull off the mild upset in Madison. UW has played below expectations all season long and MSU has more than a few playmakers in Javon Ringer, Jehuu Caulcrick and Devin Thomas. Plus, they still have SirDarean Adams on defense, and that's as cool a name as you'll find in the Big Ten.

3. California @ Oregon Saturday, 3:30 p.m., ABC

This should be the college football equivalent of watching the Phoenix Suns play the Golden State Warriors (or Dallas Mavs) . Cal at Oregon, for the right to see who challenges USC in the Pac-10. DeSean Jackson, Justin Forsett and Jhavid Best for the Golden Bears versus Dennis Dixon's Vince Young tribute band for the Ducks. Up and down the field we'll go. May just be the most entertaining football game you watch all autumn. Don't miss it.

Looks like Chicago has had enough.

Grossman and his interceptions are out, the 10 year vet Griese is in. Or so they say.

CONGRATS to: Nate Adams, Ryan Sheckler and Shaun White for getting it done in SLC. The FMX, SKB Park and SKB Vert comps were clinched and the overall Dew Cup was awarded to those three after just four stops. Nicely done boys.

SLC was an amazing host city. FAVORITE COMPS of the weekend: BMX DIRT and BMX PARK

In Dirt:
Cam White became the first guy to ever nail a barspin to tailwhip backflip. Yes you read that correctly. Awesome.
James Foster hands down had the greatest winning reaction on the history of the Dew Tour. It was precious.

In Park:
Welcome back two dominate faces that haven't been around much this season: SCOTTY CRANMER and RYAN GUETTLER.

Scotty busted out with the first ever frontflip tailwhip and his first win on the Tour this season. It's been an odd year for Scotty, who dominated the Park course last year and took the Cup race into Orlando against eventual winner Daniel Dhers. However, this season, he's been anywhere but in first. This couldn't have gone any better for him.

Guett has been up and down all year. He finally put it all together in what he told me was a dream run. 1080. Let's just remember that the first time that was done in a competition was last month in Portland by Mike Spinner. Guett nailed it twice in finals. Only to follow it up with a double backflip in the same run. Kid did good.

My girl MORGAN CULLEN is doing big things and I felt it necessary to give her a little spotlight.

Mo is an amazing designer of wedding gowns and now has broadened her appeal one more time with a brand new website. It's called WWW.RUNWAYDAILY.COM Yes, sports can be fashion conscience too. So go take a peek!

Saints ... without Deuce for the rest of the season. Yup, change your lineup, make a trade, drop him from your team. Unless, you enjoy a benchwarmer.

Read more about it.

If you thought that Konrad Reuland was that dude from the movie "Bladerunner" (that was Rutger Hauer...who, by the way, has never called three timeouts with a 45-0 lead in the first half, but we digress), you're not quite correct. Reuland is the latest member of Notre Dame's 2006 recruiting class to leave the school, having met with Charlie Weis on Sunday to inform him of his decision.

Reuland's exodus appears to be simply a numbers game. Though the USA Today named the San Juan Capistrano, Calif., native as its first-team All-America tight end in 2005, Reuland had yet to blossom in South Bend. Ahead of him on the depth chart he saw senior All-America caliber tight end John Carlson as well as classmate and fellow southern Californian Will Yeatman--who is also bigger and presumably a better blocker. Below him, but having passed him last Saturday, was true freshman Mike Ragone. A New Jersey native, Ragone did not play his senior year in high school due to injury but was still the No. 3 rated tight end in the nation. He saw time on the field in the first quarter against Michigan State.

Then there's Kyle Rudolph, a senior out of Cincinnati who has already committed to the Irish. Rudolph is considered the No. 1 prep tight end in the land (but by now, don't we all realize how imperfect those tags are?) and from what you read about him, seems too good to be true. He's like a Rudy with his innocent love of all things golden helmet.

Thus, Reuland, who was a very highly touted prospect coming out of high school, was looking at potentially being fourth on the depth chart on tight end next year. We interrupt this blog for a short rumination on the word "touted". Have you ever noticed that recruits are either "highly touted" or "untouted"? No one is ever "lowly touted". And why can't touting extend to other enterprises? Blind-dating, for example? "He was completely untouted as a blind date, but then he showed some signs of greatness with the flowers and the horse-drawn carriage ride! Back to you in the studio, Rece!"

Another point worth examining: Next year the Irish will have Yeatman, Ragone and Rudolph, all of them national stud-level tight ends. But what about the wide receiver corps? So why not scrap the wideouts altogether and start all three of the above, creating the newest formation phenomenon in college football? We'd call it the "Tight Bend", or something like that.

I mean, as long as the Irish cannot throw vertically and are not too thrilled with the quick outs that they'd run to Samardzija all the time last year, why worry about "space". Might as well throw as many 6-7 lugs with good mitts on the field as you can. The tight end, after all, is arguably the most talented position at Notre Dame of the past forty years (Dave Casper, Ken McAfee, Mark Bavaro, Anthony Fasano, etc.).

Back to Reuland. He played a little over 18 minutes on special teams and a few offensive plays last season, but never caught a pass in an ND uniform. He did not letter as a freshman. With his 6-6 frame and platinum blond locks, Reuland was always a conspicuous figure during pre-pre-game warmups. Aboout 90 minutes or so before any game, especially home games, there are always a few football players out on the field in just their game pants and T-shirts playing catch. Reuland was always one of them and appeared to be enjoying himself.

But obviously, after watching Ragone play ahead of him last Saturday, Reuland realized that he was fourth on the depth chart at his position, and only one of the three players ahead of him was more senior than he. It's one thing to be 4th on the depth chart of an 0-4 team, but another thing to be that low on an 0-4 squad that is ranked last nationally in total offense.

I wish Reuland well. And I'm wondering if the SoCal native will show up at the Rose Bowl in two weeks wearing a white No. 88 jersey to cheer on his former team.

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One of my more pessimistic, cynical friends (and that's saying something) asked me where I thought Jimmy Clausen was going to transfer to next autumn. I told him that I don't see Clausen transferring, but that if he did, it would be kinda funny if he transferred to the same school as Demetrius Jones. (leading Jones to do a Seinfeldian-shake-of-the-fist, "Clausen!"

By the way, if you're snoring at home, Jeff Ruland coached Iona men's hoops to an 0-22 start this season before being fired. And now Konrad Reuland played for an 0-4 team before leaving.

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I want to be on the record as saying that despite all the disadvantages the Irish have going against them this season (youth, the schedule, being subjected to pep talks by Regis Philbin, etc.), that their offensive numbers are embarrassing. That to a certain extent, to a great extent, actually, this is an indictment of a coaching staff that after all has been working with this team since last spring. Notre Dame isn't the only school that plays freshmen (Hello, Heritage Hall) and their offensive prowess should be better.

Now, that said, it is curious how every single PTI/Around The Horn/First Take/Mike & Mike program (okay, not Mike & Mike, because Golic knows better) fails to put the Irish's offensive rankings into context. As you know, Notre Dame's first four games have been (and first eight will have been) against schools from one of the six major conferences: Big Ten, Big 12, SEC, Pac-10, ACC and Big East.

By October 20th the Irish will have played four Big Ten schools, two Pac-10 schools and two ACC schools. Now, let's just look at the first four opponents: Georgia Tech, Penn State, Michigan and Michigan State. If you look at the current AP Top 25, you will see that 14 of those teams played a I-AA school. Of the other eleven not one school has played four teams all belonging to the six power conferences.

Before you jump all over my shiznit, Rutgers fans (and others): 1) Yes, I understand that this is the non-conference part of the schedule for the Top 25 schools and that they'll be playing tougher competition soon enough, and 2) Yes, the Irish do finish up with Navy, Air Force, Duke and Stanford.

My point here, though, is that after four games no other school that I can immediately think of (and definitely none in the Top 25) has faced nothing but power conference competition. And few schools, considering Notre Dame's inexperience, were more ill-equipped to handle it.

Bottom line: Give the Irish any other team in the nation's schedule through the first four games and I imagine they have at least one victory. And their offensive stats aren't so egregiously noteworthy. And Skip and Wilbon and Platschke and any number of Stews (Live or On Tape) are not discussing them so often.

And so my bet is that Charlie Weis, behind closed doors, has attempted to lift his his team's spirits by reminding them that this is the turbulent part of the ride. That if they can all just hang together through USC, that things will only get better. And that after USC they'll never have a day in an Irish uniform as tough as the previous eight.

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Imagine--it ain't gonna happen, but imagine--this scenario. The Irish start out 0-7 and then shock-- SHOCK! the Trojans in South Bend. That alone would expunge all the negativity of the first seven games. It's enough to make you wonder if Charlie shouldn't just forget Purdue, UCLA and BC and throw all his chips into the pot for Pete Carroll. After all, the USC game in South Bend is what started all the hysteria anyway.

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As Notre Dame becomes more and more infatuated with becoming the Princeton of the Midwest (a development most of us alums are less than happy about) and losing sight of its true identity, which is that of the nation's foremost Catholic university (sticking our tongues out at Georgetown) filled with jock-ish, hard-working-if-not-quite-Ivy-League level students who are wiseasses and slightly mischievous--as Notre Dame becomes as elitist and arrogant as the critics contend they are (and, finally, I would agree, the haters are closer to being correct than they've ever been), the school will reach a crossroads.
And that is this: You can't continue being a perennial Top 10 program in football while chasing down a Top 10 ranking in the U.S. News & World Report. I'll write more on this later, but the point is, as I've said before, that there are some great people who are outrageously gifted football players whose SAT scores and GPAs may be a little lower than their prospective ND classmates', but that does not mean they don't belong.
As I've written before, Tony Rice and Chris Zorich are Exhibits A and B of how symbioitic this relationship can be. Good for Notre Dame, and good for the kids. As my friend and former classmate Ferris (pseudonmym) wrote me yesterday, "just because they weren't in the top ten percent of their high school class doesn't mean they're going to be stealing TVs and stereos from your dorm room".

Anyway, this is the crossroads at which Notre Dame finds itself. And it is, by the way, a struggle that has been going on at the university since before the days of Rockne. But let's say that Notre Dame chooses to go the research route, the Ivy-League-In-Name route. Well then, I have an idea. Whereas my colleague Stewart Mandel proposed in an on-line column that the Irish should join the Big Ten (never gonna happen), I'm just curious as to what would happen if the brainiest schools from the power conferences aligned with Notre Dame in a sort of Renaissance Man (because that's more P.C. than "Too Slow To Cover Anyone") Conference. Here's what it would look like:

Notre Dame
Northwestern
Stanford
Duke
Vanderbilt
Georgia Tech
Rice
Virginia
Tulane
Air Force
Army
Navy

There's your 12-team super egghead conference right there (and you see, the Irish still play Navy annually). They could sign an exclusive TV deal with the Discovery Channel (which would insist on showing a Jeff Samardzija tribute during Shark Week). It may not be a BCS bowl-worthy conference, but wouldn't these dozen schools feel so much better about themselves each autumn?

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Saw a great flick last night: Once . It's about a Dublin street musician who meets a Czech single mom and how they literally, but not figuratively, make beautiful music together. Great love story, too. Think "The Commitments" meets "Casablanca." It's one o' them tiny indie films, but if it's playing where you live, it's worth finding it.

Here's the thing: Last week we discussed Julie Taymor's "Across the Universe", and I have yet to see it, so it's not fair to rip on it. Then again, who said life is fair? From what I've read, the characters appear hollow and the literal symbolism crosses into the land of parody (she actually comes in through the bathroom window? HAW!).

But here' s the beauty of "Once". It's simple and it's honest. One reason that you go to movies is for magical moments, goosebump moments, and this short film (barely 90 minutes, if that) has three of them. The first is a scene in a music store, where the guy (Guy) and girl (Girl...we never learn their names) play one of his original songs. They barely know one another when the song begins, but by the time they've finished harmonizing this tune (and it feels honest, as if she's trying to learn the tune on piano as he teaches it to her on his guitar) it's like the best first kiss ever.

The second moment was my favorite. They save the film's best song ("When Your Mind's Made Up") for the Guy and Girl, as well as a trio of recruited musicians, to perform as they cut a demo tape in a studio. There's a similar scene in the Johnny Cash film ("Walk The Line") from a couple years ago, where you realize you're watching the genesis of greatness, but this scene blows that one away.

Finally, the last scene in the movie is amazing. Bittersweet and touching and again, real.

The production values on "Once" are really low--someone forgot to pay the lighting bill-- but those three moments alone are truly affecting. The male lead (Glen Hansard, who wrote the songs) is as charming as any Irishman you'll ever meet. The Girl, Marketa Iglova, is wonderfully spunky and bright, but Hansard's performances will blow you away. This is a dude who cares.

Go see "Once". Don't worry, "Resident Evil: Extinction" will still be around next weekend.

Texans coach Gary Kubiak said that defensive tackle Cedric Killings had movement in his arms and legs before being taken off the field following a violent collision in the first half.

The Texans are going to get the ball back with 25 seconds left down by six and needing to go the length of the field to tie.

It doesn't look good but at least Houston showed up and made the Colts have to pay attention in the last quarter.

A touchdown pass from Matt Schaub has the Texans within six now with under three minutes left. The Colts have the ball and are in a position to kill the clock with a couple of first downs. Houston has two timeouts left.

With under 5 minutes left, Houston's got the ball out to the Indy 25 and is using a nice underneath passing game to move downfield but Indy is making them progress down the field by playing their standard Cover-2 and keeping the plays in front of them.

This one's a wrap as the Colts sacked Schaub on the first play of the final drive and they never got off another snap.

The final is 30-24.

It's 27-10, Ahman Green is done for the day, it appears, Andre Johnson isn't dressed and Jacoby Jones just went to the locker room to get his shoulder x-rayed after being tackled by the Colts punter Hunter Smith after a 74-yard punt return.

Even though Samkon Gado just spilled in for a 1-yard score, that's the first offensive touchdown the Texans have had today.

Jon Kitna and Donovan McNabb have combined to throw for 654 yards and six touchdowns in the first half of play.

McNabb is 16 for 17 for 340 yards and four touchdowns. That incompletion was a really poorly thrown ball though.

I'M KIDDING!!!

A few impressions from the early games...

* The Steelers are up 14-6 and New England's up 17-7 and counting in their games today and both will move to 3-0.
Circle in red the date December 9. That's when Pittsburgh visits the Patroits.

* The Eagles and Packers have stunned me today. Philly, wearing those godawful yellow uniforms (which are growing on me) got up 35-7 on the Lions and are at 35-21. I didn't think that offense was capable of that kind of outburst from all I'd seen. Additionally, you have the Pack on top of the Chargers and LT only has 23 yards. The man still hasn't gotten to 85 yards in 10 quarters of play. But Philip Rivers is 16 for 17 at the half.

Texans defensive tackle Cedric Killings has been taken to a Houston hospital for tests on what has been described to us as a neck injury.

Killings was completely immobilized on a stretcher and his helmet remained on as he was wheeled away. Killings does have feeling in his extremities according to the announcement just made in the press box.

It was apparent he had movement in his arms as the injury occurred but he wasn't seen to have moved his legs.

Killings is in his fifth season out of Carson-Newman and is in his second season with the Texans. He's 6-3, 310 pounds.

Killings is a native of Miami.

A violent collision between Cedric Killings of the Texans and Roy Hall of the Colts has left Killings motionless from the waist down.

A stretcher is on the field for Killings. Hall struggled off the field already.

Killings and Hall hit helmet-to-helmet as Killings was blocking on the kickoff return wedge and Hall was a wedge buster.

Killings moved his arms but has not been seen to have moved his legs.

With the recent injury to the Bills Kevin Everett that first had predictions of paralysis and still could have serious consequences going forward, it's hard to not fear the same thing has befallen Killings.

Meanwhile Texans running back Ahman Green has a knee injury and his return is questionable.

HOUSTON - Joseph Addai just scored what will certainly be the days most spectacular touchdown, jumping over one defender, flipping and then landing on DeMeco Ryans in the end zone.

That capped an 11 play, 65 yard drive that put the Colts up 14-10. Indy is now 7 for 7 on third down conversions.

My man Dan Wetzel of Yahoo notes that one should never "barely" fart.

Said Wetzel, "If you're gonna be a bear...be a grizzly."

Good advice from Dan

The Texans moved ahead 10-7on a Kris Brown field goal that capped a lengthy Houston drive.

The cannon blew, fans cheered and the game was moving along nicely.

We were all here, minding our own business when you could hear the spacy echo of an open mike and somebody say...."He barely farted..."

I don't know if I've ever heard those three words together before. Was it an anticlimactic cannon blast? Or something more sinister?

We're on it.

The Texans are going to roll the dice, it appears, and go for it on fourth and 1 from the Colts 43 with 2:15 left in the first quarter.

To this cub reporter it smelled like a stupid idea. But even stupider was Raheem Brock who jumped offsides giving the Texans a first down.

Colts were 3 for 3 on third down on the drive when they faced third and goal from the 2. They made it 4 for 4 with a play action dive pass to Dallas Clark. The most discouraging thing for the Texans was that, on each of the third down plays, the Colts moved the chains with startling ease.

Now we'll see how the Texans respond after their offense have sat and watched for the first 10 minutes of the game.

Colts answering with methodical drive interspersing Joe Addai and Manning hitting all his targets to get it down to the Texans 24.

There's been precious little pressure applied to Manning so far.,

Jerome Mathis just took the second opening kickoff back 84 yards for a touchdown. 7-0.

That'll help the enthusiasm level.

Meanwhile, the Patriots have already sent JP Losman limping to the sideline on a hit to the knee by Vince Wilfork. Losman stayed in and fumbled after a corner blitz by Ellis Hobbs.

This Kangaroo thing is cool but my pregame navigation is distracting me from the field.

No mind. I'll now watch the game NBC spent the money to send me to....Texans get the ball first. ...

HOUSTON - I got it good on game day. Free food, free seat, the ability to check out any game on a panel of screens at the back of any NFL press box.

You guys don't have it as good. You fight traffic, pay a bundle and then sit removed from the action with no link to the rest of the league.

But it's gonna get better. There's a handheld device called Kangaroo TV that is on sale at Reliant Stadium today for $25. On it, you can check out the whole slate of NFL Sunday Ticket In-Stadium.

You can watch the pregame shows, hit up a stats channel to check on your fantasy team and punch up a game that you may have a particular, ahem, interest in.

I have one and will tell you how it works.

The biggest game in Houston since Elvin Hayes and the University of Houston hosted Bill Walton and UCLA back in 1968 kicks off in ohhhh, about 45 minutes.

Jacoby Jones, the explosive rookie, will start in place of Andre Johnson here.

Also down for the Texans in the biggest game in Houston since the 2005 World Series against the White Sox are corner Fred Bennett, rb Ron Dayne, LB Shawn Barber, C Chris White, G Kasey Studdard, T Rashad Butler, and DE Earl Cochran.

Javon Ringer--and his backfield sidekick--Jehuu Caulcrick, have been killing the Irish in the second half. Ringer had 33 3rd-quarter yards and Caulcrick 38. If these two played here they'd nickname them "Javon and Jehuu", Shelley Smith would do a feature on 'em, and someone would pose them atop equine mammals.

Michigan State, after missing a 22-yard field goal, now leads 31-14. It's the first time ever that the Irish have surrendered 30-plus points in six consecutive games.

Evan Sharpley is now in at QB and why not? The Irish also have a double tight end set in, with Will Yeatman and Carlson.

So, 10:30 left to play and Michigan State has the ball again. This has been Notre Dame's best showing yet this season, but this team is just young and fails to make big plays on both sides of the ball. You cannot fault the effort, particularly on the defensive side of the ball, but this is a team that looks as if it must toil so much harder than its oposition for just the simplest things, such as first downs and tackles for loss. Stay tuned.

It's only midway through the 3rd quarter, but James Aldridge already has 104 yards rushing today. Looks as if the Irish have found their starting running back.

On the other hand, Jimmy Clausen has not thrown anywhere near John Carlson's direction yet.

Part of it is that Clausen hasn't had much time, but he also has been holding onto the ball too long this afternoon. Notre Dame hasn't snapped out of the shotgun all day. The offense has improved in every facet today, but the passing game still does not look crisp. And nearly everything involves Clausen rolling to his right. It often looks less as if he's rolling out than if he's running for his life.

Besides Aldridge, freshman Kerry Neal seems to have earned himself a lot more playing time at linebacker this afternoon. He's been involved in a lot of plays.

Also, it's kind of a strange sight. Notre Dame is blue and gold. The Spartans are green and white. But if you peer into the Notre Dame student section, all the students are wearing green shirts (the "The Shirt" hue for 2007) and waving these white Notre Dame towels that were handed out to all the fans as they entered the stadium.

Michigan State just put a dagger into the Irish. Facing 4th-and-2 at the 30 yard line, quarterback Brian Hoyer fumbled the ball (or did he want to fumble it and make it seem like a broken play?). It looked as if he put the ball on the ground and rolled it, then found tight end Kellen Davis behind coverage for a 30-yard TD. That was Hoyer's fourth touchdown pass of the afternoon.

31-14, Spartans. And now Notre Dame has Michigan State right where they want 'em. The Irish have trailed the Spartans by 17 in the second half in each of the last two seasons, forcing OT in '05 and winning a year ago. So how come hou don't feel so good about their chances?

Michigan State just ran onto the field at the end of halftime trailing five cheerleaders. Each cheerleader had a flag that helped spell out "S-T-A-T-E". So they can rent themselves out to other schools. Should the Spartans win this afternoon, the Irish will have to keep an eye out for not just one but five flags at midfield. Do the Irish have a nickel-flag package?

**********

Halftime stats: The Irish have 76 yards rushing, bringing the season net total to 62. James Aldridge leads the team with 61 yards. Javon Ringer leads all rushers with 82 yards.

*************

My colleague Mike Rothstein is suffering up here in the booth. Mike is Jewish and so, in observance of Yom Kippur, has not eaten since before sundown yesterday. it's tough to stay in a press box all afternoon, watching us scribes (a nod to the faith there with that slang) chow down all afternoon, and abstain yourself. Rothstein's actually squirreled away an apple and stuff so that when he returns from the post-game press conference he'll have some grub waiting for him.

*****************

Huge play for Michigan State. On 3rd-and-18 on the first drive of the second half, Hoyer found a receiver against the sideline for a 19-yard gain. Two plays later, Hoyer threw a bullet to Mark Dell running a post in the end zone. Irish really blew it on that 3rd-down play.

*********************

Pre-game scene I almost forgot: About 90 minutes before the game Joe Theismann was chatting with the host of our webcast, Bill Patrick. A few feet behind us Charlie Weis, Jr., was playing catch. But Joe had some issues with Charlie's throwing motion, which really does need some help. So Joe went out on the field and gave the kid a lesson in tossing the ball. See, and you didn't like Joe Theismann. Why? Joe's cool.

Frequent blogstalker L.A. notes that Michigan State has a freshman defensive end named Kevin Pickelman. She imagines Pickelman sacking Notre Dame QB Jimmy Clausen. No, she relishes the thought.

A lot of new faces are seeing playing time on defense for the Irish this afternoon: Besides Derrell Hand, true freshmen Brain Smith and Kerry Neal have been in at linebacker. Sophomore linebacker Toryan Smith is also playing.

To this point the Irish defense has done a respectable job of keeping Ringer and Caulcrick in check. Javon is fast, but he's also tough. He's one of those dudes who always keeps the legs chugging. You almost have to wrap him up.

David Bruton just got his first career interception for the Irish on a sideline flag route. Terrail Lambert was in single coverage on Devin Thomas, and I was just anticipating the pass-interference flag (as were you). Bruton swooped over from his safety position to make a purty interception.

On 3rd-and-six, Clausen just found David Grimes for a first-down completion. It was the easiest catch Grimes had made all day...of the three. The other two were trademark Grimes grabs, where he's near the sideline and almost horizontal to the ground. Kid isn't big, but he's got spiderwebs for hands.

To keep you up to date on what's at stake for an 0-3 Notre Dame team that has lost its last five here to Michigan State:

Notre Dame has never started 0-4.
The Irish have never lost six straight at home to the same team.
The Irish have not lost six in a row total since 1960, when they won their first and last games of the season but lost the eight in between.

One more thing to consider: In the first half the Irish have outscored their season total from the previous three games, 14 to 13.

The Spartans have a badass defensive end named Jonal Saint-Dic and I just dare you to mock his name. Saint-Dic, the Big Ten's sack leader, just swept around ND's Paul Duncan and not only sacked Jimmy Clausen but snatched the football right out of his hand while doing so.

17-yard loss, plus a fumble. The Irish were fortunate to hold the Spartans to a field goal on the ensuing drive. Clausen's 17-yard loss puts the team's net rushing yardage at plust-two thus far.

Now Notre Dame is going no huddle.

It's painfully obvious that the Irish have no vertical passing game. They're just not so fast.

James Aldridge just took a handoff and rumbled, rambled off left takcle for 43 yards? I don't even know this offense.

Easily the longest gain of the season.

And now Robert Hughes, a true freshman out of Chicago, just ran over left tackle after a 17-yard gain. That's Notre Dame's second-longest gain of the season. ND has found a weakness in MSU's right side.

Robert Hughes just scored another rushing TD. This is Notre Dame's first legitimate touchdown drive of the season, an 80-yarder on just five plays, I think. All but one a rushing play.

Nate Adams became the very first Dew Cup Champion of 2007 today. He dropped in on his first run and put up a score of 93.33 that held the other 9 riders to a fight for second. This is his second consecutive cup. Orlando looks to be a nice victory lap for Nate.. Congrats!

A special thanks to the Governor of Utah, Mr. John Huntsman, who spent the weekend here in Salt Lake checking out all of the events. He told me he's been rididng for 30 years! Great to have him here.

Next up today, a little Supercross action and then Skateboard Park Finals will be later on tonight.

Side Note: Can we give NOTRE DAME a little shout out: Charlie Weis and Co. finally got their first offensive touchdown of the year. Only took four games, but at least it is a step in the right direction.

Derrell Hand, the Edward Lewis (think "Pretty Woman", Richie Gere) of Irish football players, has been looking good at right defensive end thus far. It's early, but the Irish front three (Laws, Kuntz and Hand) have been what we like to call "stout" on defense today. The Spartans' Javon Ringer bounced outside for a nice pickup on his first carry, but since then the Irish rush defense has played well.

ND currently buried back to its own 8 yard-line (after a penalty). The offense is certainly flowing more smoothly, but you watch them and don't see any dangerous playmakers. Very little speed. James Aldridge is a good north-south runner, though. Watching all the betweent-the-tackle runs, it's as if Lou Holtz hijacked the playbook.

Aaaaaaaaaaaand Clausen just got sacked for the first time. Loss of five.

On third and 13, the Irish deeked a quick pass and handed off to Allen, but he was stopped behind the line of scrimmage. 4th and 15.

Charlie Weis was evidently unhappy with Geoff Price's 27-yard punt. Kicking from the rear of his own end zone, sophomore Eric Maust just punted. Got off a 42-yarder. The Spartans will be working with a short field on offense.

Winless Syracuse 38, No. 18 Louisville 35

That's a final.

That may as well be the Notre Dame pre-game pep talk.

Sublime afternoon in South Bend. 73 degrees, 38 % humidity (I am Sally Bowrey) and not a cloud in the sky (except the figurative ones).

Okay, fast forward (the compooter conked out and in the interim much has happened).

Your long national nightmare is over. At 10:01 of the first quarter Notre Dame's offense found the endzone, right in front of the student cheering section. Trevor Laws recovered a fumbled snap on the MSU 9 and three plays later, Travis Thomas took it in untouched from the one yard-line, sweeping left.

The touchdown snaps Notre Dame's 14-quarter touchdown drought as well as its 20 quarter rushing touchdown drought.

Give punter Geoff Price an assist. After the initial Notre Dame drive was stopped--following a first down, all via the ground game--, the senior from Texas punted a beauty that was downed at the Spartan 4.

Notes from Friday night's pep rally at the JACC:

--No one has more pep than former Notre Dame baseball player Chuck Lennon , who is as common a sight at an ND pep rally as the Leprechaun. Now the executive director of the ND Alumni Association, Lennon, in his late sixties, is the first one out to pump up the students. You do not want to follow Chuck Lennon at a pep rally. The Leprechaun introduced him as "A double Domer, and the most handsome man on campus", and how can you disagree?

--The students occupy about one-third of the arena, and all sit together. They further segregate themselves by dorm, each dorm having its own colors that are well-represented. At the beginning of any pep rally, the students are standing and all the old farts are seated. Then Lennon starts barking at the students and implores them to issue the "ON YOUR FEET!" chant to the rest of the arena. Duly shamed, the alums, parents and visitors stand up.

--Regis spoke. He's not quite as entertaining as Lou Holtz is on ESPN on Thursday evenings (and why aren't the Irish begging him to visit and give a pep talk in person?), but he is passionate. You probably saw the news clips on TV, but the best part of Regis' talk never made air.
Reege spoke about how he always dreamt of being on TV but never told anyone because he didn't have a specific talent. And even while at college, he never took a class that could assist him in a TV career. Then when he was in the Navy, he had a meeting with a tough Marine sergeant who for some reason took an interest in his future.
"What are you gonna do with your life?" the Marine asked Regis, who weakly admitted he did not know.
"Well, let me ask you this," the Marine pressed him. "What do you wanna do with your life?"
Reege confessed his secret ambition.
"Don't you know," he said at last, "you can have anything you want in this life if you want it bad enough?"

(Which doesn't explain why Michelle Pfeiffer never returned my phone calls in the early '90s, but that's another story).

--The student speakers were tight end John Carlson (who first thanked his 40 to 50 family members who'd come down from Minnesota to be here, which explains why the audience was so well-mannered and cheerful) and linebacker Mo Crum. Both kept it short and sweet. Carlson: "I've received a lot of advice this week...a lot of advice". His message was that adversity does not build character; it reveals it.

Crum said that when you go to war, you need to go with people who have your back. He said he knew that his teammates had his back (as they do at the pep rally, since they're literally sitting behind him), but he wanted to know if the crowd had his back.

--Charle Weis spoke last. I wouldn't say the applause was rousing, but it was there. Surely his aura has taken a hit in the past three weeks. Charlie promised the crowd that the Irish were going to play one of those "old-fashioned, smash-em-in-the-mouth football games". He said that he told his team to "throw the first punch" but also to "make sure you throw the last punch".
On a team that has had one player ejected for doing so (Justin Brown) in a game this season and another who should have been (captain Travis Thomas), is that really the best advice?

--As always, I fix my stare on Tom Zbikowski at these fan fests. Zibby sat in the front row and looked, if not visibly disgusted, uncomfortable. You always get the feeling that pep rallies are the last thing that Tom Zbikowski is about.

My one equation and prediction for today's game: Punt + Zibby= House (if he has more than a millisecond to field it before being hit).
--Perfect Saturday (PERFECT!) here in South Bend. Low 70s, not a cloud in the sky, and not as humid as yesterday. It'll resemble a northern California day on your TV set.

---Not related to today's game, but before I forget. In all the hullaballlo over the Raiders' overtime loss at Denver last Sunday (you remember the NFL, right?), I haven't heard anyone mention just how much leg was on Sebastian Janokowski's missed 52-yarder (after he'd made the first try)? That was a 52-yard boot that ricocheted off the very top of the left post. Think about that. Seb's shot would probably have cleared the cross bar from at least 70 yards out.

My Irish Live buddy John Walters wrote a nice article that encompassed two of my favorite things: music and football.

Have a read.

"...that's what Maryland does."

Ahhh.. the great movie we all love: Wedding Crashers. It gave so many good one liners to spice up regular conversation. However, most would agree the state that does football best isn't Maryland.

Here's a Texas-sized article on two teams representing their state the best way they can: by winning some games.

*Do I give up or do I hold on?? The question myself and so many other Fantasy Football players are feeling about Donovan McNabb. For right now.. I'm holding on. Loosely.

*2 FSU players suspended. My only comment is that Potbelly's is a fine establishment and I'm glad to see its getting some press.

*Just another reason why it is NEVER a good idea to name your son Floyd.

*If you would've said four months ago: Come September the NY Mets will crumble and let their lead slip to the Phillies and in the Bronx, the Yankees will be making the Red Sox sweat it out for the division title, I would've bet you my pay check that it was a lie. Now, I'd just think you were a genuis and I'd be poor.
*Reason #72 on why you don't gamble kids.

*My Texans are 2-0. Even if they lose this weekend to Peyton and his Colts, I'd still be happy because Andre Johnson is out and let us be honest: it's Peyton and his Colts. If the Texans win?? Well, I'll stop myself there.

*DEW TOUR.. we are in Salt Lake City, UT. The competition begins tonight with BMX Dirt and BMX Vert. Updates tomorrow.

Demetrius Jones might not have wanted to scurry out of South Bend a la Jenny in Forrest Gump , but Notre Dame was no less petulant on Wednesday when they announced that they would not release him out of his scholarship. After all, Jones is a 19 year-old kid who, oh, I dunno, might have been a little embarrassed and upset at how his year has been going so far. Notre Dame is a 165 year-old institution that'll probably get over it.

To the school's credit--albeit a day late--the Irish announced on Thursday that they will grant Jones a scholarship release, just not to a school that Notre Dame is scheduled to play in the next couple of seasons. In a related story, athletic director Kevin White announced that he would grant the offensive line a release provided they transfer to an institution that is on Notre Dame's schedule next year.

...Would it be an NCAA violation for any school to have Lou Holtz give the pre-game pep talk a la the one he gives each Thursday night at halftime of the ESPN game? God, have you ever seen anyone shine, so happily in his own element, as when Lou does this? It's utterly YouTubeable!

This week's gem, from his pep talk for Penn State, who visit Michigan: "There'll be 108,000 people in the stands, but remember this: They'll be unarmed..."

Actually, our man Rece Davis had the best line, coming out of the segment, noting that Michigan has a penchant for adding seconds to the clock late in a game (shades of '05). And how's your inbox this morning, Rece?

Go to YouTube and type in "Lou Holtz Pep Talk" in the search if you want to see it. And to the first commenter who typed, "This F_____ can't speak for s___!", just one question: Which Big Ten school did you attend?
***************************

Two years ago Michigan State had a 21-point second-half lead and almost blew it against the Irish (Notre Dame was actually up in overtime, 41-38, before losing 44-41). Last year the Spartans had a 17-point second-half lead and choked (and by the way, if you want to truly enjoy yourself, listen to radio host Mike Valenti's recap of that choke job:

http://deadspin.com/sports/college-football/pucker-pucker-pucker-204391.php

). But that was the John L. Smith era. I'm not sure the Irish can recover from a 17-point deficit on Saturday. Oh, wait. Yes, I am sure that the Irish cannot recover from a 17-point deficit.

Thoughts after an afternoon of sparring with the "Jersey Boys" from New Brunswick:

1. Thanks to all who wrote (including G.A., if for nothing else, the "Utes" line alone). My favorite comment was from the RU fan who admitted that he too was annoyed by Schiano's three timeouts because "I was waiting until halftime to use the men's room and it was really inconvenient". Those of you who went straight for Travis Thomas' mugging of the Penn State upback will have a great future in campaign strategizing: of course it was wrong and inexcusable and it had nothing to do with the topic at hand. Thomas should have been ejected from the game and maybe even stripped of his captaincy for a game or two. But it has nothing to do with the timeouts which, by the way, a few Rutgers fans still found a way to defend.
One Rutgers fan did email to apologize "on behalf of the ruder Rutgers fans-- I see them shouting down all the polite ones as we grow as a team and it is--as churlish a comparison as this may seem-- like watching your child fall in with a gang of hoodlums and wondering where the sweet kid you knew has gone. And for the record, I have no defense for the timeouts."
All in all, dealing with sports columnists who chastise your school for calling three timeouts when you're up 45-0 in the second quarter is the kind of headache that Rutgers fans have been waiting decades for, no? And as for the reader who suggested that I, as the establishment (Ha! If you only knew...) cannot handle seeing the little schools matter, Ian Johnson ran right past me into the end zone last January 1 (I think Pat Forde and I snuffed out the fake before anyone on OU's defense) and it's as big a thrill as I've ever had watching a sports event. Closest I've ever come to audibly cheering.

2. My old colleague Stewart Mandel at SI.com is always thorough, objective and solid with his college football reporting. I really like what he said in his mailbag this week regarding the Weis v. Willingham saga. To abbreviate, and be far more flippant than Stewart would likely be, Notre Dame and its followers (please don't mame me write "Notre Dame Nation" ) soured on Willingham not because he was black but because he was vanilla. Okay, that's oversimplifying, but he did say that when things went south, record-wise, Willingham's bland, aloof personality did not help. Nor did his less than tireless recruiting regimen. Mandel also pointed out that everyone playing the race card is hurting no one as much as they are African-American coaches. Which is true.

3. On the other hand, one reader asked me this week how come Notre Dame has never hired another black head coach in any other sport besides Willingham? Ever? I am not positive that is true, but if it is my only response is that there is no acceptable explanation for that. But before you go around labeling the school as "institutionally racist" as this reader did, you may want to pick up this book and read it:

http://books.google.com/books?id=YErpG9ExKNUC&dq=&pg=PP1&ots=TUCOG_f4M-&sig=a5ZSYF6x2KJ7yZBTQW4AnClEy64&prev=http://www.google.com/search%3Fhl%3Den%26q%3Dnotre%

4. Back on the other hand again--how many hands do I have?--, this needs to be said. Notre Dame feels a lot more elitist now than even just when I was a student twenty years ago. In much the same fashion that I doubt that Jesus would be accepted at too many Catholic parishes today (no job? no family? hangs out all day with twelve other dudes? and isn't even willing to show us his tax return [which one parish I know requested of a family member of mine]), I'm more than sure that the greatest legends of Notre Dame football would not be welcome there today. George Gipp and Knute Rockne? Never even graduated from high school.
Two weeks ago I ran into Tony Rice on the sidelines at Penn State. When I was a student in South Bend, Tony was by far the most popular guy in my dorm (sorry, Todd Brinker, but he was). And this was when he was a freshman, before he'd ever suited up for the Irish. So much for the racism theory.
But the other point I'm attempting to make (because someone connected to Notre Dame needs to score a point every now and then) is that Tony Rice was great for Notre Dame. He not only was a gridiron ambassador but he's a goodwill ambassador as well. No one who's ever encountered Tony Rice has failed to come away happier from the experience. Tony simply shines. Always has. And he took the brunt of Lou Holtz's most caustic rim-shot verbiage with grace.
But would Tony Rice get into Notre Dame today? Would Chris Zorich (another academic borderline case who, by the way, is now a lawyer)? Lack of talent is not the reason the Irish are 119th in total offense and scoring offense this season. But the school's admissions dept. might want to consider prospective students who are, as much as one can assess, solid people who may not go on to medical school but can still handle the academic load.
Besides, isn't football a career now? Not just playing, but coaching (former player Steve Belles now coaches the 9th-ranked prep team in the nation, Hamilton High in Chandler, Ariz., according to si.com) and commentating (Jerome Bettis, Mike Golic, etc.). And isn't Notre Dame's football program more renowned nationally than say, it's chemistry department? No offense, Emil. So why can't a kid with decent grades--if not the ones the admissions dept. wants in order to boost its U.S. News & World Report ranking-- who wants to pursue a career in football go to one of the best places on the planet to further educate himself?

5. As much as I agree with my man Stewart Mandel on Weis v. Willingham, and as much as I intend to make "Bowls, Polls, and Tattered Souls" the next book I read, I disagree with his logic on why he kept Louisville ranked above Kentucky this week. I'm not one who believes in a playoff, but isn't this the rallying cry we always hear from those who do: "Let them settle it on the field". The inference there, at least what I've always inferred, is that the belief is that you let them settle it on the field because whoever wins is therefore better.
Well, Kentucky beat Louisville. Never mind by how much or that it's a border war or it happened in the final minute. Kentucky won. So if you still have the Cardinals ranked higher, aren't you admitting that the preseason polls are influencing you more than the action on the field? To me that's 9-3, which is Notre Dame code for "not good enough".

6. Finally, can there be a more awkward moment in college football during a weekday than when Notre Dame practices its point after tries? I gotta believe that every time Notre Dame special teams coach Brian Polian barks, "Okay, Point After team", a few players get that strange look you do when your roommate tells you that if his ex-girlfriend (who dumped him) happens to phone, just take a message.

First, an apology: In my rant that appeared yesterday discussing the differences between Rutgers' 3-0 start and Notre Dame's 0-3 start, I failed to credit Rutgers coach Greg Schiano for making a classy gesture. Schiano, like Notre Dame head coach Charlie Weis, had his players follow behind the Midshipmen and stand at attention as the Naval Academy alma mater was played after the game.

I honestly did not know that, and it was a grievous omission (as no shortage of Rutgers fans have informed me) on my behalf. I apologize.

I do not get to see Rutgers play, My job on Saturdays is to chronicle the non-doings of the nation's most statistically inept (after three games) offense in the land. And even Rutgers fans, students and alums will agree with me, I believe, that the Scarlet Knights do not get much air-time on ESPN's "College Gameday". At least not yet this season.
Honestly, it almost feels like a Pavlovian response up in Bristol that the moment someone mentions Rutgers, they tee up that blimp shot of the fans rushing the field in the waning moments of last November's thrilling defeat over Louisville (every play of which I watched, and which enthralled me). But that's almost all ESPN ever shows when it comes to Rutgers. If you didn't know better, you'd think that as NBC is to Notre Dame, Rutgers' home network is GoogleEarth.

I did make an error in failing to recognize Coach Schiano's class after the Navy game. And I typed "New Brunswick" (the campus's location) when I should have typed "Piscataway" (the stadium's), which is a serious error considering I'm a Monmouth County guy myself. (Rutgers is in Middlesex County; yes, I know).

What I have yet to hear from Rutgers fans who hate me (join the legion of Notre Dame fans who despise me for writing that the Irish had no business being in last year's Sugar Bowl, by the way) is an adequate explanation as to why Coach Schiano called those three timeouts against Norfolk State late in the first half last Saturday. Please don't tell me that the outcome was still in doubt. Or that he was working on the two-minute drill. There's a part of me that thinks that if Notre Dame hung 45 points on a team in the first half and Weis called timeouts, we'd be hearing about it. But there's a bigger part of me that doubts Notre Dame will score 45 points through the first half of this season.

Deep down, the reason that college football is so popular is because it taps into that great American pastime: Arguing. And this is just one more example of that.

The primary purpose of my contrast between Rutgers and Notre Dame was to show that, if the circumstances were different, you still wouldn't hear a peep about the Scarlet Knights being 0-3 (duh) but you'd hear all about Weis trying to run up the score before the half against a hapless victim. Of course, a lot of that is simply history. And the element of shock value. Before Coach Schiano turned the program around, an 0-3 Rutgers would not be a story.

But I am always intrigued by how readers attack the messenger, as opposed to the message. Last Novemeber, when I wrote that the Irish were a fraud for accepting the BCS bowl berth, a litany of angry responses flooded the inbox. The overall theme? "You're just resentful because you couldn't even get into Notre Dame."

But I went there.

"You're just jealous because you're a little (rhymes with "faggot"...wait, it is faggot!) who never played sports."

Actually, I earned a varsity letter rowing crew.

"Well then, you're just an asshole."

That is true, but has nothing to do with this argument.

I get enough letters from readers telling me that I'm being unfair to the Irish ("It's Willingham's fault for being a poor recruiter!' and "At least we don't play criminals!" ) to feel very confident that I'm not a company man. I made a mistake or two in the Rutgers piece, and I apologize for that. Coach Schiano has not only infused the campus with energy and a legitimate Top 20 football program, but he behaved with great class against Navy.

That said...

1. It may have been only a smattering of students, but that Drunken Pirate act of yellling obscenities at the Navy players is just piss-poor behavior. There are witty and hilarious ways to mock an opponent that don't cross the line (I personally loved the "Notre Dame, No. 1 In Its Conference" bedsheet sign that an LSU fan made for College Gameday two Saturdays ago). Last year in East Lansing the entire student body sang a chorus of "F___ the Irish", which is just sad. It's the difference between being Joe Pesci's "Cousin Vinny" character who walks into the bar to confront the braindead local yokel and being that yokel himself. If the best you can do is "F___ the Irish", you might as well stay outside the stadium and work on your Hillbilly Golf game.

2. The timeout maneuver versus Norfolk State was bush. I know that Schiano pulled the starters for the second half, but that move was bush. And when you become a top 20 program, expect to have your moves scrutinized a little more closely.

Finally, I apologize to Rutgers for the errors in my article. The main point of the story was, Has anyone wondered why 0-3 Notre Dame gets daily attention on every ESPN bloviation fest while Rutgers, sitting right there in the shadow of the Empire State Building (assuming it casts a 47-mile or so shadow, which it probably doesn't, but go with me here) has not yet? ESPN can't send a crew down the Turnpike to showcase them? And, again, if the situations were different, ND would be getting just as much attention while Rutgers would be receiving just as little. And the point of that is, Hate the Irish if you want, that's fine. But understand that they're not the ones courting the cameras. The cameras are searching for them.

Thank you. Go Scarlet Knights!

Anyone who has known me for more than two meals knows that I have a problem with spilling. The family calls me "Spilly" (as do many friends) and my Valdezian ways with beverages, soups, communion wafers (I dropped an entire plate of hosts back in the 5th grade) and even my own person have been chronicled in the pages of Sports Illustrated as well as at nearly every family gathering for the past three decades.

I spill, therefore I am.

So I'm pleased to report--to spill the beans, as it were--that last weekend in Ann Arbor, in the span of twelve hours, there were two spills that were all-timers. The first happened after dinner on Saturday evening. I'd gone to Bennigan's with Teddy Greenstein and Brian Hamilton of the Chicago Tribune , as well as with Gene Wojciechowski (a.k.a., "The Typographical Terror") of espn.com. So there we are outside the restaurant, saying our goodbyes, and as I release my hand from Gene's grasp and step off the curb, I lose my balance and land right on my butt.
Just like Jimmy Clausen.

At first I was a little embarrassed. Obviously, being in the presence of Wojo had made me light-headed, and I was prone to a swoon. Then Teddy Greenstein said, "John, don't worry about it. You only fell in front of three sportswriters. It's not as if we have access to the printed word or like to chronicle other people's mistakes or know anyone in your line of work. So don't worry about it."

The second spill was better. Sunday morning. I've just stepped out of the shower and made the in-room coffee in time to catch ESPN do a recap of Saturday night's games. Perfect timing, but I have to hurry. So, coffee cup in hand, I scoot over to the bed, prop up some pilllows and prepare to enjoy me some of that fine entertainment called television.
Did I mention I am fully naked at this moment? I didn't? Well, I am.
You know what happens next: Involuntary jerk of the hand (note to self: probably not a good idea to type "I am fully naked" within four blog entries of "jerk of the hand" from here on out) and the full cup of coffee goes flying.
"OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"
My right hip and anterior hippal (what's the correct word, then?) area gets soaked by steaming hot java. My intense pain is only ameliorated by the realization that I was millimeters away from scalding a part of the anatomy that should never be exposed beverages of either temperature extreme.
Close call.
Unfortunately, the bedsheets were stained with coffee. Soaked. I found a maid outside my room, my mission being to at least warn her as to what she was about to confront in my room. But of course she spoke no English. Which is how I came to regret that I'd never learned the Spanish word for "spill". The best I was able to do was to provide my room number in digit form ("tres duo uno"), the term "cafe con leche" and I believe I actually said, "beddo".
But "spill"? That failed to register with her.

So my Sunday nights these days are devoted to reading all about what happened in college football on the previous day regarding teams besides Notre Dame. And it's thirsty work. These teams actually score touchdowns, so there's more information to digest.

Anyway, that comes at the behest of my editor (Die Barry Die...which will be the name of my new rock band if I ever learn to play an instrument). And last night that was killing me because there was so much Mussee television on: Chargers-Pats, Yankees-Red Sox, and the Emmy Awards. Not that I completely abstained from viewing, but I missed so much (sorry, Ruth).

If you want a devastatingly wicked Emmy recap, visit yuckysaladwithbones.com in a day or two. I'm sure Katie McCollow, the venom-fanged Bombeck of the 21st century, will have a great review. The only moment I saw, while flipping, was Ricky Gervais winning for "Extras" (Walters' faith in the wisdom of humanity is briefly revived) and then John Stewart and Stephen Colbert giving the award to Steve Carrell. That's hard to believe: Carrell taking something that belongs to Gervais.

From what I read this morning, the one moment I wish I'd seen was when Brad Garrett told Joely Fisher that he'd like to be in a western with her entitled "Bury My Head Between Your Knees". That line alone probably earned him a free pass on the next four seasons of "Celebrity Poker Showdown" (which did not win an Emmy). Also not winning an Emmy was "The Ron Clark Story" which, I'm sorry, I loved. I'm behind you, Matthew Perry.

Is there anything more exciting in sport, that is besides college football, than a Yankee-Red Sox game at Fenway Park? I watched nearly all of the 4:48 marathon on Friday night and didn't mind a minute of it. And then Jeter's three-run blast last night in the top of the eighth? Jeter is the ultimate "I"m glad he's on our team" guy of this generation, in any sport. He is to team sports what Heather Locklear is to TV shows.

By the way, did you read where Eric Gagne inadvertently (or so they say) threw a bullpen pitch last night that nailed Yankee reliever Mariano Rivera in the right arm shortly before he entered the game in the bottom of the ninth. Yes, Gagne has been more valuable to the Sox in the bullpen than coming out of it.

Oh, and I enjoyed Bob Costas' interview with my new Sportsman of the Year, Roger Goodell, a man so bent on integrity that the first four letter of his last name are G-O-O-D. I probably shouldn't be saying this, but couldn't NBC save a lot of money--and have a more intriguing hour--by just giving us Costas and Collinsworth in the studio and sending everyone else home with lovely parting gifts?

From the little I've seen of him so far, Washington freshman quarterback Jake Locker is going to be a great one. But even if he isn't, he just has to stay in big-time sports long enough to warrant having his own sports talk program. Its name is built in: The Locker Room .

Watching Super Troopers recently and it occurred to me to ask any quarterback I see this question. Provided they've also seen it, have they ever walked into the huddle and attempted to see how many times they could sneak "meow" into the play call? "Rocket right meow iron cross meow shift meow tampa fifteen meow on meow meow".

Looking back, maybe it wasn't such a good idea for the Notre Dame offensive line to have their offseason conditioning program at Curves .

The following statement was issued today at 3:30 p.m. by Dr. John Marzo, Bills Medical Director:
Just received an e-mail updating the condition of Bills tight end Kevin Everett.

The statement comes from Dr. John Marzo, the Bills medical director.

"Kevin Everett remains medically stable in the intensive care unit, and continues to make daily improvement in his neurological status. When examined Sunday evening by orthopedic surgeon Andrew Cappuccino, Kevin demonstrated increased strength in the muscles of his legs. In addition, he was able to show some movement in both hands. Supportive care continues for vital body systems while Kevin begins to focus on his neurological and musculoskeletal rehabilitation."

AM: Did you have any knowledge of this practice before last week?

RK: No. Before last Sunday's game, I had no knowledge of this practice. I must tell you, it was really disappointing, especially after such a great game. What made it particularly disheartening, in our group of companies, we hold people to very high standards and this isn't what we're about. I've discussed that with Coach Belichick.

AM: Have you considered and/or are you considering any further action against Bill Belichick?

RK: Commissioner (Roger) Goodell levied the highest penalty on anyone in the history of the NFL between the first round draft choice and the financial penalty. He made his statement known. We accepted it. Coach Belichick apologized and from here on in, it will be handled as an internal, private Patriots matter.

AM: The commissioner said this did not affect the outcome of the game, so what did Bill Belichick tell you was the purpose in doing this in the first place?

RK: Whatever Coach Belichick wanted to accomplish to me now is really irrelevant. What's relevant is that Commissioner Goodell put out a very severe penalty and I must tell you I was quite upset and perturbed when I saw the penalty because I didn't think that the incident deserved this kind of punishment. Over the last couple of days I've been thinking about it and have cooled down, I realized he wasn't just sending a message to the New England Patriots, he was sending it to all 32 teams. In the end, Commissioner Goodell is the custodian of this game and the integrity of this game rest on his shoulders and he's sending a message to all teams and I support that and I think so do the fans who emotionally get charged by us.

AM: Bill Belichick said he misinterpreted the rule. The commissioner said this was a calculated and deliberate attempt to avoid a longstanding rule. How can a coach as smart as Bill Belichick misinterpret that rule, which is so clear?

RK: I don't want to speak for Bill Belichick. He had a chance to make his presentation to the commissioner. He was very articulate. The commissioner was very courteous and listened and asked great questions and made his ruling and we're going to let the matter just stay at that level.

AM: Did you discuss with Bill at all whether there is any other thing here that could put this franchise in further jeopardy in terms of being assessed more penalties?

RK: I know of nothing else that could be in this category.

AM: Are you then confident that this is the end of this episode?

RK: Well, let me just say, I had no idea this was going on, but I can tell you this – it won't happen again in the future.

AM: One other thing, it's being reported tonight that Bill Belichick has signed a new deal, you've agreed to terms with his through the 2013 season. Is that true?

RK: Well, the coach and I have had a policy that we don't discuss his contract, but he's made great contributions to this franchise over the last seven years and myself, and all of our fans, truly appreciate his efforts.

....that touchdown may have been the proverbial cherry on the pile of trash. Or some other metaphor that's less family friendly.

If San Diego's going to lend any drama to this game, it needs stops. Don't expect the Patriots to stop throwing with a 17-point lead though. That's not the way they operate.

Clock-bleeding time doesn't start for a little while yet.

In his first home game in Gillette Stadium, the Patriots plum free agent signing Adalius Thomas just picked off Philip Rivers in the flat and returned it 65 yards for a touchdown.

So far, Moss, Welker and now Thomas have all made big, big plays in the first half. With a little from Donte Stallworth as well.

I discounted the impact the Pats' additions could have on the talent gap beween them and the Chargers.

It appears its been more than mitigated by the Pats.

At the risk of back-scratching my colleagues, that was a terrific piece demonstrating what was and wasn't legal in terms of technology during the game.

Again, the use of video is LEGAL during a game if you do it under a roof and not from the sidelines.

That fact makes it mystifying to me why the Pats didnt' just settle for training on the sideline of the Jets with their sideline or end zone camera.

Makes ya wonder benefit they were gaining from the sidelines. Audio perhaps?

In a little more than 5 quarters, Randy Moss has 15 catches for 249 yards and two touchdowns.

All the people who've been saying Moss wouldn't have a big year because the Patriots spread the ball around to the man that's open may have to rethink that. Moss, even when he's covered , is open.

I'm not that right.

The Chargers defense looks flat right now. Whether it's the protection, the speed with which Tom Brady is getting the ball out or the separation the Patriots fleet of receivers (Wes Welker, Randy Moss and Donte Stallworth) but there is absolutely no heat or penetration at all on the Pats quarterbacks.

Last winter in the playoffs, it was a jailbreak every play and Brady was under siege. The Pats are just tight, tight, tight with their performance (in a good way) right now.

And just when it seemed the Chargers had made a play by getting Brady to hurry his pass, Stephen Cooper just knocked Brady in the head for no reason to extend a drive.

And he gets hurt. Adalius Thomas is out now replaced by Junior Seau.

Philip Rivers, meanwhile, is getting deconstructed in this first quarter.

Adalius Thomas needs shades for his live head shot just popped up on TV but for this night game and last week's game during the day, he had naked eyeballs?

The sun never sets when you're cool.

To go 48 for 60 for 560 yards and 8 touchdowns tonight.

That would result in a convincing win for all GM's owning Brady in their fantasy league. Which is really what it's all about, isn't it?

Wes Welker's about as enjoyable as a boil if you're a defensive back.

And Randy Moss is even less pleasing. Hey, Chargers. Ummmm, Randy Moss 2007 doesn't play like the Randy Moss of 2005 and 2006. Might want to get a guy within 10 feet of him in the red zone.

It's 14-0 and should be 17-0. Marty wouldn't have let this happen.

Meanwhile, "Mudfoot" is musing that Hochuli may be on HGH. If that stands for Huge Guns, Hombre, I'm with ya, Mud.

Adalius Thomas took the opportunity to bend Chargers tackle Shane Olivea backwards during a three-yard carry on the Chargers second drive.

Olivea was on his knees with the pile stacking up behind him while Thomas continued to push at Olivea's shoulders and wrench him backwards.

Olivea left the game, replaced by Jeromey Clary.

After a brilliant pick by Rosevelt Colvin on Philip Rivers' first attempt of the night put the Patriots at the Chargers 24, New England went three and a missed field goal by Steve Gostkowski.

Now San Diego has the ball back and has had a false start and a 2-yard run by LT that ended with Shane Olivea on the ground injured.

And he's still down.

Two Sunday nights in a row America's been treated to the bulging biceps of the one and only Ripped Ref Ed Hochuli.

He makes housewives SWOOOON!

The Pats opened with seven straight passes and Tom Brady completed 7 of them for 69 yards on their first drive which resulted in a 7-yard touchdown pass to Ben Watson.

The key throw was a 34-yarder in the seam to Wes Welker. The Patriots perhaps seem a little more explosive without Reche Caldwell and Jabar Gaffney as the starting wideouts.

Earlier this week, I talked to former Patriots linebacker about the lifting of opposing signals.

He recalled a playoff game in 1998 when the Patriots knew some of the audible signals of Miami quarterback Dan Marino.

"I think we had a tip during the week," said Johnson. "If I correctly recollect we had a tip that Marino’s audible was a certain gesture that meant a slant route and my goodness if it didn’t happen."

On one play early in that game, Marino audibled at the line and another New England linebacker, Todd Collins, started chopping his arm to indicate a slant.

"Todd started screaming slant and Dan still did it," said Johnson.

Collins picked Marino off and returned the pick for a score in what ended up being a convincing New England win.

"That’s a perfect example of having insider’s information during the week and having it benefit you during the game," said Johnson. "But as prevalent as everyone thinks (sign stealing) is, I don’t think a lot of time is spent on it."

FOXBORO - According to a TV cameraman who was on the scene last week when Patriots staffer Matt Estrella was hauled off the Jets sideline for videotaping their sidelines and trying to heist signals, Estrella was initially approached because he had on a different color vest than he should have.

At NFL stadiums, all cameramen wear a vest handed out on game day. Still photographers wear red; video guys wear black. Estrella, using video, was in a red vest. So game security had a reason to approach Estrella. It did, noting that he wasn't supposed to be wearing a red vest. Instead of merely giving him a new vest, that was the point at which he got hauled off.

It's worth wondering if Estrella was purposely handed the wrong vest so that A) he'd stand out and B) security would have a reason to approach him in the first place for an innocuous violation that could (and has) grown into something more.

FOXBORO - The Great Surveillance Snafu has not died down as game time approaches.

Parking lot conversations, radio talk shows, the press box and - hey - the NBC Sunday Night Football pregame show were all dominated by the talk of the Pats getting busted in New York.

So, despite this being perhaps the best early-season matchup of the year, precious little talk about, y'know, the game has occurred.

Lloyd Carr apparently has little interest in setting a new record for Michigan margin of victory over the Irish, preferring to mirror the score that the Maize and Blue won by four years ago in Ann Arbor (38-0). Carr's been calling nothing but run plays between the tackles since UM went up 38-0, but ND isn't willing to let the hosts rest that easily. Brandon Minor just picked up a first down on a 3rd-and-9 play when even I knew Michigan wa going to stay on the ground. And as I wrote that, Brandon Minor picked up yet another first on a 3rd-and-7 when, again, we all knew that Lloyd was attempting to be compassionate.

Even if the Irish were Belicheating, it wouldn't make a difference today. What do the Irish want Michigan to do? They're already basically telegraphing their plays. It's illegal for UM to use Notre Dame's offensive line.

Number of times I've typed "LLOYD!!!" today (before that time): Zero. This has been an utter and complete butt-kicking by the Wolverines. When was the last time Notre Dame looked this pathetic? I'm going down to the field now to put my head on Bonnie Bernstein's shoulder.

Wow, Michigan sure does feel good about itself this afternoon. And why not? Their A.D. is on the horn with Kevin White this minute proposing a home-and-home series each year.

At halftime I suggested to a colleague that the Irish desperately need a patsy to play just to instill their confidence. "They can't play themselves," he said.

You wonder what the last two men to wear No. 3 at this school, Darius Walker and Demetrius Jones, are doing this afternoon.

I do believe that Golden Tate may set a new NCAA record for kickoff return yardage if this keeps up this season.

First things first: The Irish need to just score a touchdown to even remember what it feels like. I imagine Charlie would gladly take an excessive celebration penalty at this point in the season, don't you?

Shawn Crable just extended Notre Dame's drive....Crable is a Michigan linebacker who was just flagged for roughing the passer. That's a 15-yard penalty, and Notre Dame's biggest gain of the day.

Just in case you haven't gotten enough bad news yet, the site secpoon.com has been shut down. Apparently, they posted a photo of Nick Saban's 15 year-old niece and Satan (or however you spell it) got all huffery and puffery and it was beginning to look like the fate of Ralph Macchio in "My Cousin Vinny" unless they took the site down. So, to recap, Notre Dame cannot score and the most, um, visually arresting new website of the season has been shut down. One more reason to wish that Saban had remained with the Dolphins.

Avert your eyes. Shoo the children. This is ugly.

Here's yet another stat of absolute incompetence for you.

Notre Dame has now had 36 offensive drives this year. Those drives have yielded zero touchdowns and two field goals. Then consider that one of those field goals was the product of a drive that began on the Penn State 7 yard-line (and ended on the Nittany Lion 4).

A poster on deadspin.com suggested, in an effort to be helpful, that the Notre Dame offense should line up in the opposite direction from the line of scrimmage. That way all of those negative plays will go "forward". What? Would it be any worse than what you're seeing?

Remember, the Irish are being shut out--and held to near negative net yardage--by a defense that in its first two games had allowed more than 500 yards per outing. Notre Dame offensive line coach John Latina? The bell tolls for you.

I'm openly inviting readers to send in plays or suggestions as to how to improve the Irish offense. Mine? Send in Bonnie Bernstein as a wideout. That will at least distract the Wolverine secondary.

I'm no mathlete, but if the Irish were last in the nation in scoring offense entering the game, and if they fail to score today, well, then they'll likely be last again this week, right?

You think Kevin White may be rethinking having agreed to continue this series annually through 2031 right about now? Some history for you. Notre Dame and Michigan have played 34 times. The Wolverines lead the series 19-14-1. Before today....

The Most Points Michigan had scored versus the Irish: 47, last year.

The Largest Margin of Victory Michigan had against the Irish: 38, in 2003 (Wolverines won 38-0)

Here, with 5:10 remaining in the first half, it's Michigan 24-0.

Nobody--at least not me--takes any glee in Notre Dame's misery at the moment. A lot of people do, for sure. But this is like watching those baby sea tortoises try to make it from the nest to the surf before getting picked off by seagulls. I don't doubt Notre Dame's effort--something I'd wondered about earlier this week--but the execution was as bad this quarter as any I can remember since Gerry Faust left.

A quick rundown of Irish mistakes. Again, this is just the first quarter:

1. A high snap on the first play from scrimmage, resulting in a 17-yard loss.
2. Jimmy Clausen stripped of the football and failing to cleanly fall on it. First official fumble, first official turnover by the Irish.
3. Pass interference flag on Ambrose Wooden on a corner route in the end zone. Gives UM a first-and-goal at the 2.
4. After gaining a first down, ND center John Sullivan snaps his second high ball over the QB's head, resulting in a loss of 14 yards.
5. On second down, the exchange between Clausen and Allen results in a fumble. Allen recovers.
6. Clausen sacked on a zone blitz, loss of eight.
7. Tom Zbikowski, typically, returns a punt fiercely and gets 16 yards...but team captain Travis Thomas, the supposed captain of the special teams, is flagged for clipping. Fifteen-yard penalty.
8. Clausen gets sacked again.
9. Allen gets popped, coughs up the football.

Unofficially, then, the Irish have fumbled the ball three times and lost two. They've been sacked twice. They have minus-36 yards rushing, bringing the season total to minus 44. They've been called twice for pass interference (the second on the first play of the second quarter). They've twice snapped the ball over the QB's head. And they've had just one offensive snap in Michigan territory.

Cue Howard Jones's "Things Can Only Get Better"

You can (and so many before me have) make a list of the hundreds of wonderful things unique to college football that make it so special. Three off the top of my head that I can see right in front of me:

1. The Wolverine helmet design (which Fritz Crisler took with him from Princeton to Ann Arbor many decades ago)
2. The ND gold helmet
3. Michigan players sprinting out onto the field and leaping up to touch the "GO BLUE, M CLUB SUPPORTS YOU" sign.

A word or two about Michigan Stadium. It's beautiful in its simplicity (Rockne copied its design to build Notre Dame Stadium) but it's the least imposing 107,000-seat stadium you'll ever visit. It's not very loud and it's not very vertical. Also, I arrived here about 2 1/2 hours ago, before anyone was in the stands. Every last outdoor seat at Michigan Stadium is a bench. Not one chair, not even one bench with a back on it. Allows them to cram a lot more fannies int.

Oh, and at some spots there are 32 seats between aisles. If you have to use the bathroom, you choose your moments wisely.

Notre Dame to receive....and Golden Tate is dropped at the 17. Awaaaaaaaaaaaaay we go!

By the way Michigan's QB, Ryan Mallett, is H-U-G-E! It'll be like watching hyenas bring down a wildebeest if ND ever gets close enought to a sack. Mallett can throw a football 87 yards (as opposed to writing "87 yards in the air"....Where else is he going to throw it?). Then again, I don't believe either Ga. Tech or Penn State had to even start a drive from their own 13-yard line or worse yet this year.

ND's First Drive: Credit Charlie with trying to mix it up a little. The execution just was not there. On first down the Irish lined up four-wide with Armando Allen at quarterback in the shotgun formation. Fresh idea, but John Sullivan snapped it over the 5-10 freshman's head. Seventeen-yard loss.

Technically, then, Notre Dame has used three different starting quarterbacks in 2007.

So Demetrius Jones has gone Charlie Frye on the Irish, just one game later. He starts the season-opener, plays a little more than one quarter without leading his decal-free helmeted offense to a score, and that's it.

My guess is that in the next 24 hours you'll see the word "bus" in articles about Notre Dame more than at any time since Jerome Bettis graduated ("That's right, our players graduate "....thanks, Coach Weis).

He's not the 3rd-string quarterback for the Irish, but the 3rd-best QB on this Notre Dame roster is actually senior All-American safety Tom Zbikowski. In high school at Buffalo Grove (Ill.), Zibby threw for 1,382 yars and ran for 1,287 (and 23 TDs) as a senior. If he'd have chosen the other school that recruited him heavily, he might be starting at QB for Nebraska today against No. 1 SC (Spoiled Children, South Central, Sooo Cool).

Word from Notre Dame associate athletic director John Heisler is that backup walk-on quarterbacks Darrin Bragg and Justin Gillett were not contacted in time to make the team bus on Friday. We're working on the details of how they got themselves from South Bend to Ann Arbor, but I like to imagine a Harold and Kumar-type escapade through the cornfields of the Midwest as both confided to one another that, "Hey, man, I haven't actually even opened the playbook this month."

I'm watching Michigan State struggle at home against Pittsburgh. If Mark D'Antonio, the new head coach in East Lansing, isn't smart enough to hand the ball off to either Javon Ringer or Jehuu Caulcrick on every play next week against the Irish, I don't know how else to help him.

Top 25 teams don't seem to like playing at noon, eh? No. 7 Wisconsin (i.e., "criminally overrated Wisconsin") was tied 21-21 at the half against The Citadel in Madison, while No. 18 Virginia Tech is all even at 7-7 with Ohio at halftime. At least it gives Rece Davis a reason to be excited.

(Thanks to Boyko, by the way, for the header....I was originally going to go with, "Well, He's Not Down At The New Amsterdam")

Oh, and before I forget, did anyone else see the CNN Headline News piece this morning (I flip channels when GameDay goes to commercial, even though Corso tells me not to) on the chef who has tongue cancer? A chef with tongue cancer!?! It's sad and ironic and comic all at the same time.

Notre Dame's marching band is on the field and in honor of the two teams playing this afternoon, they're playing Tom Petty's "Even The Losers".

Who's goint to win, you ask, as we sit ten minutes or so before kickoff? The feeling here is that Michigan's season is going to start out like the spelling of their coach's first name. An L, and then another L, but that's the end of it.

If you're a Notre Dame fan, what you want to see is a little consistency from the Irish offense...and a touchdown would be nice. Also, if you tune in to SportsCenter tonight and the first name you hear i s Michael Hart, you may just want to dip your head under water for the next two minutes.

I'd like to quell the rumors that Demetrius Jones will start the second half for the Northern Illinois Huskies. However, we do hear that he's already enrolled at the MAC school in DeKalb. I'm trying to wrap my mind around the coordination of it all. Did DJ already re-sell his books at the Notre Dame bookstore? How far behind is he on his coursework at NIU? Did he literally go out with a bang on Thursday night, breaking parietals in his Fischer Hall dorm room?

Jeff Samardzija was a two-sport athlete. It turns out that Jones, who was technically enrolled at both Notre Dame and NIU on Thursday, is a two-school athlete.

Inquiring minds and all...

LIFE OF (OFFICER) BRIAN

Walked to the stadium on this fine September afternoon from my hotel, which is about two miles south. It's literally a blue-gray sky outside. When I arrived at the busy intersection on Michigan Stadium's southwest corner, my peaceful bliss was interrupted by Officer Brian. He stands at a podium on the corner of Stadium and Main, ostensibly there to direct traffic. But mostly what he does is taunt Notre Dame and its fans. He's brutal and he's blatant:

"Please remember to patronize the booths around here to help the economy of Ann Arbor, so that it doesn't start to resemble South Bend."

And...

"There goes a Notre Dame fan heading in the opposite direction from the stadium. He already knows how the games' going to end up today."

And he has a microphone. You can hear him from 200 feet in any direction. Isn't this inciting a crowd? I mean, he's not as bad as that cop who's been heard constantly on Headline News today ("You want to try me tonight, young boy?"), but Officer Brian sure seems willing to pick a fight. He reminds me a little of that scene from the Sarah Silveman Show in which the title character is stopped by a policeman. He points to his badge and asks her, "Do you know what this means?"

And Silverman replies, "You got straight C's in high school?"

If you're wondering who Notre Dame has on the bench at quarterback behind "That Seventies Hair" , reserves Darrin Bragg and Justin Gillett, who, like Jimmy Clausen, are also from California, were called away from a Saturday catching rays at the Indiana Dunes. Bragg is a senior from Bellarmine Prep in San Jose, and his brother Craig last year was a wideout with the Green Bay Packers...which means that Craig was in the same skill group as former Notre Dame quarterback Carlyle Holiday.

Gillett grew up in Santa Barbara.

Saturday Picks

Notre Dame @ Michigan

Ann Arbor News columnist John Heuser predicts Michigan 21, Notre Dame 17. SI.com's Stewart Mandel predicts Michigan 21, Notre Dame 13. On Wednesday's call-in show the fabulousl Tiffany Simons put me on the spot and I said, "Michigan 20, Notre Dame 13."
So columnists think alike. Someone phoned earlier this week and asked me," Why is Michigan favored by seven?" My response: "Have you seen Notre Dame play this year?"

Southern Cal @ Nebraska

Team of this decade (Trojans) versus team of last decade (Huskers). I'm reading my buddy Austin Murphy's book, Saturday Rules , and inside we learn that Pete Carroll was an extra in the 1973 Disney film, "The World's Greatest Athlete". Actually, he was a stand-in for the film's immortal star, the one and only Jan-Michael Vincent. Pete returned an interception like a hundred yards for a TD. It's tempting to go with the Big Red upset--no school's fans are more loyal--but I've learned not to bet against Pete.

Tennessee @ Florida

Also from "Saturday Rules", and no, I don't receive a commission. Gator coach Urban Meyer explains that the three most powerful emotions are "love, hate and fear". Which makes me wonder, what emotion is it that Coach Charlie Weis most often instills in his charges (Don't get me wrong; I honestly like Coach Weis. It's just an honest question). Regardless, Tim T. Beau, as I like to call him, is a Brobdingnagian force of nature and I don't see anyone outside of Baton Rouge stopping him and the Gators any time soon. Goooooooooooo, Gators. That said, Vols, I love you for taking on the game at Cal and you will get every benefit of the doubt from me this season.

Ohio State @ Washington

Defense. The Buckeyes have the best player on the field in linebacker James Laurinaitis. U-Dub has had a great start and this is a sexy upset pick--freshman QB Jake Locker is a true stud-- but these Buckeyes have played in a lot more big games than the Huskies. Todd "Arsenio" Boeckman won't be put in a position to have to win this game for Ohio State. Tressel will keep it on the ground and Ohio State wins a close one.

Boston College @ Georgia Tech

This will be the most competitive game of the week between two Irish oppenents (conquerors?) this season. The difference will be the quarterback. Matt Ryan of Boston College is not Demetrius Jones. I like the Eagles in a tight one.

Louisville @ Kentucky

Or perhaps this will be Saturday's tightest game. Likely its most passionate. Louisville's defense, as you've been reading, is the kind of defense that makes Hawaii's look staunch. I like Andre Woodson and the Cats in a mild upset.

And finally....

West Virginia @ Maryland

Tailback Steve Slaton will have his typical Heisman-eligible game, but I also forsooth freshman tailback Noel Devine rushing for a 100-plus yards. It won't be like 2006, when WVU went up 28-0 after one quarter, but the Mountaineers will breeze past the Friedgenaires. I'm calling it West Virginia 31, Maryland 14.

In this morning's Ann Arbor News, two writers and actor Verne Troyer are asked which former Wolverine they wish could suit up for UM this afternoon against the Irish. The scribes selected Charles Woodson while Mini Me picked any former defensive stud. Me, I'd select Yale Van Dyne because I just like saying Yale Van Dyne.

It was author Ken Kesey who, in Tom Wolfe's hilariously underappreciated and under-read non-fiction book, The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test , told someone who was wavering on whether or not to continue traveling with the Merry Pranksters on their whimsical pilgrimage, " You're either on the bus, or off the bus ."

In other words, you're with us or you're not. Make up your mind so we can get on our damn way.

Early on Friday afternoon Demetrius Jones, the man who started at quarterback in Notre Dame's season opener just two weeks ago, decided that he was not on the bus. Jones chose at the last minute not to board the team bus to Ann Arbor. Here is Charlie Weis' statement on the incident:

"At 2:30 today, while boarding the bus to Michigan, I was notified that Demetrius Jones had decided not to make the trip. I have not spoken to Demetrius and can only say that he missed the team bus. Any additional comment would be without all the facts."

Possible reasons Jones decided not to travel with his teammates to Ann Arbor:

1. Wanted to catch the "Selections from the O'Grady Collection of 19th-Century Photographs of Asian Women" exhibit at the Snite Museum of Art before it left campus.
2. Interhall ultimate frisbee tryouts on Saturday afternoon
3. Has irrational yet grave fear of traveling by coach
4. Decided that the only thing worse than playing for the most impotent offense in America is being a backup on the most impotent offense in America

Jones's defection suggests that he feels he was never given a fair shake to keep the starting job. It always seemed like a no-win situation for Jones--handed the reins to one of the most inexperienced offenses in the nation for his debut, and facing one of the best defenses in that nation on top of that-- and as it turns out, the Demetrius Jones era as a starter at ND lasted about the same time as did the Charlie Frye era in Cleveland (the parallels between the Browns' and Irish QB situation this past month is bizarre, no? Like, Cleveland's QBs coach is named Lincoln and Notre Dame's is named Kennedy).

Anyway, late Friday evening Notre Dame announced that it had traded Demetrius Jones to the Seattle Seahawks.

Seriously, though, who would Notre Dame's 3rd-string quarterback be for Saturday's game? Or will Demetrius just catch a ride up on Saturday morning with his boys?

Like you, I did not wake up at 4:55 a.m. in order to watch the U.S. play Sweden in the Women's World Cup. By the way, if it smells all perfumy in sports this weekend, maybe it's the glut of women's sports action going on right now. Phoenix Mercury at Detroit Shock in the decisive Game 5 of the WNBA Finals this Sunday, which I mention only because:

1. Two of my favorite characters from that most purchaseable (?) tome, "The Same River Twice" (operators are standing by to take your order...others are sitting by), are involved: Diana Taurasi of the Mercury and Swin Cash of the Shock.

2. It would be kind of funny if the Mercury got the WNBA title in the same year in which the Suns got robbed of it...or at least robbed of the opportunity.

Anyway, I didn't see the Women's World Cup match live, but during the highlights I discovered my new favorite sports name, which belongs to the U.S. goalkeeper.

HOPE SOLO

Hope Solo!!! What an awesome name. It sounds either like the bastard daughter of the Millennium Falcon commander (he met a stripper in Alderaan and the rest is history) or the name of a chick band whose CD is currently available in Starbucks. Hope Solo. Wouldn't it be cool if she got married to a descendant of Winslow Homer. She'd be Hope Solo-Homer. And then she could have a son named Walkoff. Anyway...

Hope Solo is the coolest name in sports I've seen in quite awhile. At least as cool as Apollo Anton Ohno. Wait, what if she married Ohno? Hope Solo Ohno!

I find myself yelling at the TV screen A LOT when I watch ESPN's "First Take" in the morning. Maybe I should rearrange my schedule so that those are the hours I go about my online crazy-eights playing and walking of the cat. Anyway, it's not just Rob Parker or the 2 Live Stews (I'm dying for the Sklar twins to be guests opposite Skip Bayless under the billing 2 Live Jews). It's everybody.

Officially, then, I'm a middle-aged man who lives alone and yells back at the TV in disagreement with everyone.

Hear me out, though. Because while I do no hear anyone on ESPN or The Deuce or just about anywhere spouting these opinions, that does not necessarily make them wrong. Even if I am the one opining.

1. Greg Oden
Oh, the wailing, the tearing of garments, the utter catastrophe that the pundits are bemoaning the Greg Oden microfracture surgery. So allow me to be the first (at least that I've heard) to proclaim that, should Oden return to form by this time next year, that this will be the best blessing in disguise that the Trail Blazers could have hoped for.
Why?
In November of 1996 I happened to be at the Minnesota Timberwolves' season-opener, where the opponent was the San Antonio Spurs. David Robinson, the Spurs' MVP-worthy center, would miss that entire season with an injury. The T-Wolves blew out San Antonio that evening, as many teams would that season. San Antonio wasn't really that horrible, but they were just missing their best player, one of the very best in the league.
Robinson's season away was, in retrospect, the best thing that ever happened to the Spurs. Their poor record allowed them to select Tim Duncan, who has only been the best player in the league (no matter what the shoe companies will have you believe) the last decade. San Antonio has won four NBA Finals since the Duncan draft.
Portland was not about to win the NBA Finals next season, much less get there.
If, due to Oden's injury, they move back into the NBA lottery next June and are able to select another formidable talent to supplement Oden and the rest of their yound studs, Morose City will be Rose City once more. They could very well be THE TEAM of the next decade.

2. Trading Charlie Frye
This move by the Browns has been lambasted everywhere in the media, even by my own friend, NFL guru Peter King. Browns management, in effect, becomes lambastards.
To me, though, the trade of Frye makes perfect sense.
Derek Anderson is 24 years old and has designs on being a starting quarterback in the NFL, and at worst, a No. 2.
Charlie Frye is 25 years old and has desigs on being an NFL starter. At worst, a No. 2
Brady Quinn is 22 and he will be Cleveland's starter by October.
Too many young alpha dogs in the quarterback meeting room, in other words.
Ken Dorsey is 26 and just happy to be the guy who holds up the flash cards to quiz BQQB on the plays. He's just glad he's not working at his father-in-law's brokerage firm. You know.
You could keep Anderson or Frye, each of them knowing that BQQB is one play from a season-ending injury (especially considering Cleveland's line), but you cannot keep them both. Because whoever is that No. 3 QB is going to be quite the malcontent, and who can blame him?
And so why don't you trade him sooner? Well, because BQQB didn't even arrive in camp until mid to late August. And besides, why not give him an opportunity in the first game to at least win that job and make Anderson the odd man out?

3. Nebraska-USC
Why can't the Huskers beat the Trojans? Nebraska isn't a Top Five team yet, but the Trojans are inexperienced on offense and the Husker faithful, who haven't had a chance to watch a visiting No. 1 visit Lincoln since 1978 (shocking, isn't that, considering all the OU-Nebraska games over the years?), are going to be bigger and redder than ever. Simply to be contrarian, I'm going with the Huskers.

Steve Belles began his gridiron career at a school named St. Mary's and I'm beginning to wonder if Belles will consummate it at a school named after the virgin mother.

Belles, 40, is the head coach at Hamilton High School in Chandler, Arizona. Last year, in his first season at this newly minted desert prep powerhouse, Belles led the Huskies to their third 5A state championship in the past four years. Pretty impressive, considering that Hamilton itself has only existed for ten years. This year Hamitlon is 3-0--their season-opener was called just after halftime due to weather with the Huskies leading 44-0--and ranked in the top twelve nationally on most prep ranking lists.

Belles, who spent the previous five years at Glendale (Ariz.) Mountain Ridge, has compiled a 63-13 record in his past six-plus years as a head coach in Arizona. Before that he was 26-25 as a head coach at Desert Mountain High in Scottsdale when that school, too, was, like Belles, just starting out.

I first saw Belles from a most unenvious vantage point: I was lined up in the secondary and he was playing quarterback in the fall of '83. Our two schools, Brophy and St. Mary's, were the only big-time Catholic schools in the Valley of the Sun at the time...but alas for us, St. Mary's was the only one that was playing football as if it belonged in the big time. Belles shredded our defense--I prefer to go Alberto Gonzalez if asked to recall the score--and his running back, Carlton Campbell, shredded my right pinkie on a touchdown run (it's still crooked to this day).

Belles led St. Mary's to the AAA (largest class at the time) state championship in his senior year at St. Mary's in 1984. Four years later he was a backup quarterback, special teams stud, occasional running back and receiver on the Notre Dame team that won the national championship. In the unforgettable 31-30 victory over Miami in 1988, Belles snuffed out a fake punt by the Hurricanes and made the tackle. Two and a half months later he was back in his home town, Phoenix, helping the Irish do an easy 34-21 win against West Virginia in the Fiesta Bowl. That victory capped off a perfect 12-0 season, Notre Dame's last such unblemished, national championship record.

It's a solid resume, and even a storybook one. Belles, whom former Notre Dame coach Lou Holtz described as being "tough as nails", is, like current Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis, an alumnus. Like Weis, he has coached a high school team to a state championship. But he also has a player's pedigree that Weis does not. He quarterbacked a team to a state title and, more importantly, is a direct link to Notre Dame's last national championship

And then there's just the bizarre coincidence of the name. A school with a French name that translates to "Our Lady" hiring a coach with a French surname that translates to "beautiful". Could it happen someday? Stay tuned.

By the way, Hamilton High School is a story in itself. Were it not for my high school alma mater, Brophy, going on a last-minute 99-yard game-winning TD drive in the 2005 state championship game (i.e., they've learned how to play football since I left), Hamilton would be sitting on four consecutive AAAAA (largest class today) Arizona state titles. This from a school located in an area that was cotton farms just fifteen years ago. Moreover, former USC legends John Robinson and Matt Leinart both live within a mile or two of Hamilton today.

How do I know all this? My niece, Jamie, is a sophomore at Hamilton and my parents, siblings, and their kids all live within just a couple of miles of the burgeoning Arizona athletic powerhouse. Keep an eye on Steve Belles. He's going places.

20-3.

I'm not even joking.

Yes, they played Kansas City. However take note:

Matt Schaub was 16/22 with 225 yards, 1 TD and 1 INT.
Andre Johnson had 7 receptions with a whopping 142 yards and 1 TD.
Defense had two interceptions off of Damon Huard and Larry Johnson had only 43 yards on 10 attempts.

All I'm saying, is for my team, it's a nice start.

Asante Samuel, ballyhooed by Patriots fans and national commentators as a top tier cornerback while he held out, just got embarrassed on a touchdown pass to Laveranues Coles.

Inside the 5, the Jets threw a fade to Coles. Samuel never turned around but got his hands on Coles' hands as the ball arrived, breaking it up.

So petrified of Samuel were the Jets, they went back to the same matchup on the next play and - despite interfering - Samuel still couldn't stop it.

Again. He's not. That. Good.

Jets fans.. did you just cringe?

Your boy, Chad Pennington, back on the sidelines. And that looked like it hurt. BAD.

Pennington is back on the field hobbling around and completing passes.

The most dangerous Pennington is an injured or cornered Pennington. And he's got the Jets down to the Pats 12.

But this one is over and the only drama now is whether he keeps his foot attached and Moss gets to 200 yards.

Randy Moss now has six catches for 157 yards and a 51-yard touchdown he just scored on a bomb from Brady.

On the TD, he ran past Darrelle Revis at the line then broke to the post as he was trailed by Jonathan Vilma, David Barrett and Erik Coleman. Brady threw it far enough left for Moss to have an angle to coast past all three defenders for the score.

Oh, yeah...and Ellis Hobbs had a 108-yard kickoff return for a touchdown. But that's been rendered a tiny sidebar compared to what Moss is doing.

Longest kick return in NFL History just made by Hobbs of the Patriots.

108 yards. Write that down.

If only you could've been in my chair and watched Gregg's victory dance. Priceless. Just Priceless.

Jarvis Green just sacked Chad Pennington and caught his foot under him as the two men fell. The ankle bent around but didn't snap.

Pennington must have let out a bloodcurdling scream because Patriot Vince Wilfork started frantically waving to the Jets sideline to send out the trainers.

Pennington got up like a wounded deer, fell to all 4s, then hopped off the field on one leg.

Ever-classy Jets fans then cheered as Pennington's backup Kellen Clemens took the field.

Never mind that Pennington was 11 for 14 and keeping the Jets in it.

I'm in the Pro Football Talk Fantasy contest amongf the media and so far have amassed 4 points - three from Larry Maroney of the Patriots and one from Rian Lindell with an extra point.

I'm down 20-4 to Dave Richard of CBS. My Screamin' Peacocks club has a preponderance of lae starters though so I smell a heartbreaking, late Sunday flurry of scoring.

Do stay tuned.

Those are Randy Moss' first half numbers with 1:14 left before intermission.

Wow. He's a real disruption. And he's lost a step. Looks like all those people who said he was a dog had it dead on.

The Jets are such an annoying opponent.

They are out-talented by the Patriots and have so far gained 10 yards on 7 carries. Yet it's 7-7 because they are adaptable on offense.

Meanwhile, Randy Moss just caught consecutive passes of 33 and 22 yards. It's going to be simply unfair with him in this offense.

You've seen Bob Glauber of Newsday on the ESPN program First Pizza.

He happens to be sitting alongside this reporter today. This meaning me. Anyway, he really is enthused by the promise of Wes Welker in the New England offense.

So, despite the fact Welker has so far dropped two passes -- including a third-down dart that boinged off his hands -- he continues to salute his own ability to diagnose football.

Yeah. Like he's the first guy that it's dawned on that Wes Welker might have a good year.

Should be a long day.

Then switch your teley over to MTV around 9 pm tonight. Yes the VMA's are lame (at least that has been the case for the last ___ years) HOWEVER there is one reason you should watch at least the first ten minutes of the show.

BRITNEY SPEARS.

Homegirl is set to open the show and that means one for sure thing: absolute mess. Some say it will be the true start to her comeback. Others are screaming this is the final meltdown for the pop tart mother of two. Hell, who cares. Either way it is bound to be interesting. And I for one do not plan on missing it.

Who has to point out all the time when he's right. That said....who loved the Bills over Denver?

This guy. This guy right here.

The Patriots are on the march so far, moving from their 9 to the Jets 11 in 11 plays. Upcoming is their first third down of the game. Wes Welker and Laurence Maroney are killing it and Welker just scored on an 11-yard dart from Brady as he turned David Barrett inside out.

The Patriots didn't see a third down until the 11th play of the drive and that was the touchdown pass.

It was a cool 91 yard drive on 12 plays in 5:09.

It was reported on CBS' NFL Show by former Texans GM Charlie Casserley that Asante Samuel has to play 60 percent of the Patriots defensive plays and New England has to win 12 games in order for him not to be franchised next season.

Samuel, who did not start today, is taking a chance leaving his fate in the hands of those who also decide playing time. Imagine the stink if he winds up playing 58 percent.

He just came on now on the fourth play as the nickel corner. Five plays, he's been in for one.

Randall Gay is playing in his place.

Gregg and I just got done with our very first FANTASY FIX LIVE show.

Thanks to all of you for calling in and asking your questions. Hopefully you got your answers and now have your line up set and ready. Cause its that time.

Now briefly a look back at that Thursday Night game. Umm.. for those who thougtht the following:
Saints will beat the Colts - easy.
The Colts D is and has always been bad.
Super Bowl Champs lost a lot of guys.. Saints have unstoppable Reggie Bush.

Not. So. Much.

I'm not sure if the Saints Offense was just sloppy or the Colts D actually is good. Yet to be determined.
Reggie Bush didn't look that stellar. While Bush was filming commercials, Joseph Addai was working the playbook. And doing it well.

Speaking of commercials, did anyone else feel like the game was an insignificant part of a series of commercials. They'd come back to the game for twenty seconds, say that the Colts were up with 3 minutes to go in the quarter and back to yet ANOTHER COMMERCIAL. Ugghhhh..

Here's what I wrote while watching the game, starting with Kelly Clarkson kicking things off.

Kelly Clarkson is so sick.. she's awesome.

Faith Hill... needs to get a new song. This Kiss??? Even after all this time, it still is an awful song.

If this was your first time watching football... you’d think the only person playing for the Colts is Peyton Manning and for the Saints its Reggie Bush.

Fantasy Owners: did your heart stop when Addai got nailed on the first play? Yup. Maybe they gave up DeDe Dorsey a little too soon. No offense to Kenton Keith.

Olindo Mare... 52 yards and a no go.

Waiting for Tonight by J Lo takes us to break... (lets update the playlist)

Addai w/ the ball... looks like he feels fine.

Dallas Clark with 1st first down of the season

Awww.. Marvin Harrison and Peyton get their first connection of the season. Tear.

Marvin with the first touchdown of the season.. the game has finally begun.

Adam V up for a kick. O. Mare take notes... that is how you kick a field goal. Try it next time..

Switched to Greys' Anatomy... Meredith's mom is crying. Uhhh... No thanks... back to the game.

Drew Brees wears contacts??? What?

Well at least we know he can see.. nice catch off that blocked pass.

And the Colts Offense is back up ... for a total of six seconds.

Is it just me OR does it seem like there are a million commercials?

Love the Visa Check card commercial with the "When the Saints Go Marching In" song and the guys getting fleur de lies shaved on their heads..

Back to Greys... even though its a rerun, I still watch.

After four straight plays, Addai with the first down.

FUMBLE... Oh Reggie Wayne. Bad Boy. Touchdown SAINTS.

Tie game.

Not really sure about that Sprint commercial where the woman voice countsdown the seconds until Manning gets sacked. Semi a little creepy.

Sunday night promo...

ANOTHER FREAKING COMMERCIAL. I’m sorry I thought I was watching a football game? My bad.

Yo... Louisville is only up on Middle Tenn by three points.. 38-35.

Back to the game... Peyton changes the play... umm doesn't work that great.

Does anyone else laugh every time they hear "Will Smith"?

Colts punt the ball... woah! Nice job Moore on that 30 yard return.

Colts D is looking good... Brees and Co. are having trouble getting down the field. 3rd and 3

Mare is up.. for the kick.. take two. Well done.

Pink takes us tooooo you guessed it a commercial...

Kick off... commercial. This is getting ridiculous. So I turn it to Louisville game... Freaking Peyton Manning commercial for DirecTV. I cant escape.

Back to Grey's... this time its Meredith who is crying and the mom who is listening. Time for surgery. Hellooooo Dr. McSteamy.

Plug for Tony Dungy. New book out, great. Sure to pick it up so I have something to read during all these damn commercials.

Andrea Kramer on Tony Dungy and his monumental events in history.

Time Out by Manning

Hahaa. Tony Romo commercial is cute. You know I met Jerry Jones at the Super Bowl. Why do we care? B/c the game isn’t on.

Offsides on the Colts.

Saints 99 is a B-I-G boy

HARPER bats away Manning throw. 4th and 13. Come on out punter.

Al Michaels says "New Or-lee-ens"

False start by the Saints. First penalty of the night for them. Too bad b/c it looked like Bush was going to have a good run.

FUMBLE. Only to have the Saints scramble to get it back

Nothing for Bush... punt to the 15 yard line,

Could Olivia Mannings ring be any bigger??? Wow.

Whoever drafted Dallas Clark is loving him tonight.

Oh wait, I did. But I benched him. MISTAKE.

Addai nice first down at the 20 yard line.

Minute left before the half, Colts looking to score...

3rd and 5. Saints call a time out. Incomplete. Kick by Adam V, its good. Tie game.

Manning 101 yds and TD

Brees? Not so much.

Colston first down, TO for Saints.

29 seconds left, Brees goes down by Dwight Freeney.
Brees shovels it off to number 67 who is like "what the hell is going on?" flag on the play.

Tie game, now to NYC for halftime show.

Not really sure what this halftime show is supposed to be? I guess it is just meant to be fun and not talk about the game at all. However nice to know Cris Collingsworth is noting the same thing about the commercials.

Tiki Barber thinks the Giants have a chance against Dallas. Wow. What insight.

Peyton Manning has his name attached to a hospital?? St. Vincent’s? Derek Zoolander Center for children who want to learn how to read good.
Ok, nom Manning is beginning to make all of us look like slackers.
There's Olivia's ring again.
Archie looks miserable.

First down Addai.

Dallas Clark, first career rush. Freaking great game for this guy. I'm an idiot for benching him.

Harrison, first down and goal, 42 yard reception, nice. Think they score here?

Addai TD. He is pumped and so are the fans and I'm happy cause its been a while since a commercial. 71 yard drive, kick is good.

Aerosmith takes us to break.

Ben Utecht , first down. Colts Offense starting to look normal- as in good. 173 passing yds for the Colts, 57 for the Saints.

Everyone kept saying tonight would be a high scoring game. They were right, just picked the wrong game. Louisville 58-Mid Tenn 42 with 11 minutes left in the fourth.

TD Reggie Wayne, nice dance now 24 pts over the Saints with 10. Fantasy owners are starting to breathe normal b/c Manning is starting his magic.

Brees 11-18 for 57 yards, McAllister saves the day with a first down.

Ohhh Tim Gunn’s Guide To Style is on, yeah! Dipping out of the game for a moment

Best Commercial of the night? Gregg and I were just on. V-Cast and John Madden commerical. Granted we were the size of ants on a camera screen on the TV. But hey it's a start.

And a what a great start to the 2007 season. Enjoy the games today kids!!

EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. - It's pushing 80 hazy degrees here in Northern New Jersey today and on the turf here at Giants Stadium, it's going to be stamina-sapping hot.

These conditions are going to affect three key players today - Patriots Randy Moss and Asante Samuel and Jet Thomas Jones have all been limited through the preseason. All are active today but it's impossible for them to be expected to play four quarters at top condition.

Jones, who'll start at running back for the Jets, went three weeks without practicing before getting on the field last Monday. Moss was on the same program. Samuel, meanwhile, missed all of camp before returning to the team 12 days ago,

How well these players hold up deep into the game -- Jones and Samuel in particular -- could ultimately alter the way the game is approached.

Penn State just scored the coup de grace TD (you can argue their second TD was such, I guess) to make it 31-10 midway through the fourth. And now the sound system here is blaring one of Charlie's favorite tunes, "Living On A Prayer".

That's gotta sting.

What was my prediction? 42-10, Penn State. I wasn't actually hoping I'd be that prophetic. Of course it ain't over yet. But it's close.

We're closing in on nine quarters without an offensive TD for the Irish, and 15 quarters without a rushing TD.
We'll grant the fact that the recruiting blew in Willingham's final three seasons, but it isn't as if the Irish are facing the Steel Curtain cast. Right now their confidence is so shaken I'm not sure that they could hit paydirt versus the Steel Magnolias cast.

A Notre Dame offense enduring a prolonged scoring drought. What South--or North--quad freshman--or sophomore--cannot identify with that?

Tom Zbikowski just made a vintage Zibby punt return down to the Penn State 7-yard line. And because he couldn't take it those final seven yards, it's going to cost the Irish four points. The Irish gained two yards in three plays from the the seven before wisely settling for a Brandon Walker field goal.

It's 17-10, Penn State, and where would Notre Dame be without its defensive backs this evening? Yes, you read that correctly. Darrin Walls and Tom Zbikowski are responsible for all of Notre Dame's scoring, and in addition Zibby has caused two fumbles that were lost.

Bill Lewis: Offensive Genius.

The Liquid Paper student section has not been as loud throughout as I might ahve supposed. That's because JoePa and Morelli are boring them to sleep with the play-calling, and when you add in that a lot of them have spent the past four nights camping out in tents on a sidewalk, well, they're probably already a little wiped.

The stadium literally swayed after Derrick Williams' first-quarter punt return for a TD, but since then it's been subdued.

Clausen just looked for Carlson on a third-and-long, but PSU's zone had him blanketed. Clausen had to dump it off to Will Yeatman for a short completion well shy of the first down. Geoff Price is going to cramp up pretty soon if this keeps up.

Notre Dame had eight penalties for 54 yards in the first half; Penn State had zero penalties. On the Lions' last two offensive plays, they've been flagged. Coincidence? I think not. Refs are human, too.

Remember that Joe Paterno line about wishing that newspaper people had been banished to hell ("I"ll take questions from Damon Runyon and Grantland Rice first, then I'll open it up to the rest of the media")? Well, I'm up here in the press box and guess what? JoePa got his wish.

It's glass-enclosed and it's not air-conditioned. I love how last December 31st in Boise it was 19 degrees and my "press box seat" was outside. Tonight in State College it's like 119 inside the press box, and we cannot get outside. I know, I know. At least I'm here. And I'm grateful. But until you've spent four hours in an overly cramped space with sweaty sportswriters, please don't judge.

Oh, and there's just one john (as in one urinal) for the entire horde of male media. And every third scribe exits the restroom with that Ace Ventura "Do NOT go in there!" look on his face.

I've been shoeless the entire half, by the way. Better than shirtless.

Coming out of the tunnel at halftime, John Carlson introduced himself to Charlie Weis. It was a touching moment.

Notre Dame First Half Drive Origins:

1-15-ND15
1-15-P42
1-25-ND25
1-10-ND20
1-10-ND17
1-10-ND10
1-15-P49

--When it comes to blond seniors for the Irish, Geoff Price's name should not be called more often than John Carlson's. Should we return to the "I don't know where John Carlson is, but I just saw him in the Soul Asylum 'Runaway Train' video" joke? Carlson has yet to be thrown to this half.

--Between bad starting field position and O-line screw-ups, Jimmy Clausen is starting way behind the eight ball too many times tonight.

--Why isn't Darrin Walls playing offense? If only the Irish O had a dude who could run in the open field like that.

--Joe Brockington is having a helluva first half. In fact, Notre Dame's front seven is controlling the line of scrimmage thus far.

--The Irish complete three screen passes in their opening series. Then they never return to it. If Penn State adjusted to it, then didn't the Fighting JoePas leave something else exposed by doing so? And why haven't the Irish exploited that? Punch, counterpunch, counter-counterpunch. Isn't that the idea?

--Travis Thomas, we love you. But the "Allen-Aldridge ESPNEWS" backfield needs to begin its own era, too.

--Let me reiterate: Tight end John Carlson, no touches in the first half. Geoff Price, Notre Dame's leading ground gainer of the first half. Do you recall whom we was the Irish's most important player coming into this season?

--The Irish are looking at eight straight quarters--two games--without an offensive touchdown. When do we revoke Charlie's Genius Card? Does he need to visit the Apple Store Genius Bar for a tune-up?

--Tom Zbikowski just forced Penn State's second fumble--in Nittany Lion territory--of the first half. That on top of Darrin Walls' 73-yard interception return for a TD. Robot Genius, it's time for your unit to step up.

--Irish have eight penalties for 54 yards. Subtract those from ND's 78 yards of total offense and you get 24 yards, which is not MENSA level offensive wizardry. Mencia-level, maybe.

--It appears as if this is the week when Notre Dame wastes a game deciding who their starting tailback will be. Let's see, you have eleven players on offense and twelve games. Notre Dame's offense will be entirely settled when they face Stanford in the regular-season finale, which could very well be their bowl game this season. Hey, Palo Alto is much nicer than a lot of the other pre-New Year's Day bowl locales.

--Penn State: The Paternovers .

Not the first time we've seen this in the Robot Genius era. The Irish come out and make an impressive first offensive drive (think Michigan '05, or Ohio State, Fiesta Bowl, '06) and then cannot find that rhythm the rest of the game. That's what has happened here in State College so far.

And can anyone tell me why Armando Allen is standing on the sideline while Travis Thomas plays all half (outside of the opening series, that is)? Is this another "We're worrried about Armando in blitz coverage" excuse, or is there a vaiid reason. Notre Dame's offense was so much sharper with him in the game.

While Northwestern needed a second-half surge to overcome a 14-point halftime deficit to Nevada, two schools from the Pacific Northwest are about to make the biggest news of the day so far.

Washington is about to hand No. 22 Boise State their first loss since December 28, 2005. The Huskies are up 24-10 with about two minutes to play. Jake Locker is for real. And Ty Willingham is suddenly 2-0 as a very underwhelming Ohio State comes to visit the Emerald City next weekend.

Meanwhile, has the Ryan Mallett era already begun in Ann Arbor? The true freshman QB is in the game for the 'rines in the waning moments of a 39-7 crush job by the Oregon Ducks. I might have believed that Michigan could lose at home this afternoon, but would you have ever thought they'd get smacked around that badly? And only score one TD?

Meanwhile, it has now been seven quarters since the Irish have scored an offensive touchdown.

Oh... Jarrett , of Subway sammich fame, is here. He's standing on the sidelines and they just flashed his smiling mug on the big screen. And there's Charlie Weis, asking defensively, "Why are you all looking at me?"

I cannot hear what Messrs. Blackledge and Patrick are saying, so pardon me if I repeat them. Notre Dame is playing a nickel package this entire series (Ambrose Wooden in) and yet they still seem to be owning the line of scrimmage. Early big play here, 3rd-and-8 for the Nittanies...and Morelli is sacked for a 13-yard loss. The Hanes T-shirt crowd here is growing restless.

And there's some unhappiness brewing where the punt took place. Tri-captain Travis Thomas was just called for a personal foul on upback Jerome Hayes. Watching the play over, I'm surprised Thomas wasn't tossed from the game. Which would have alleviated Charlie's congested backfield dilemma.

Today's only-in-college-football website you need to check out: booties4booty.com, a webs site dedicated to promoting USC QB John David Booty's Heisman campaign while showcasing some wild onions. Looking at those photos, I'm just relieved that Pete LaCock was never up for the Heisman.

Derrick Williams of Penn State just made a FANTASTiC punt return for a touchdown. Just a bunch of great moves made even more impressive by the fact that he caught the ball off his shoetops. 78 yards. Zibby had a beat on him, but he made a sweet cutback at around the 25. Credit Penn State's blockers for staying with the play and making key blocks all the way down to the 5-yard line.

7-up, with 0:52 to play in the first quarter. We've got ourselves a good one. And now let's just see if the Irish can go an entire offensive series without a penalty, fumble or a sack.

Kelly just booted it eight yards deep into the end zone. Move the kickoff back to the 25 next season.

What did we say last week? What did we say? The Irish were going to need a special teams or defensive touchdown in order to beat Georgia Tech. Didn't happen. Ga. Tech 33, Irish 3.

What did we say this week? What did we say (and aren't we sounding annoying?). For the Irish to win, they were again going to need a turnover/special teams TD, they'd need to silence the White Out gang, and the O-line would have to block.

Cornerback Darrin Walls, a sophomore, just intercepted Anthony Morelli's first pass of the evening and returned it 73 yards for a touchdown. It's very, very early (8:23 of the first) but Notre Dame has come to play this evening. They don't at all resemble the lost souls of last Saturday. And Penn State looks a little surprised that this Whiteout Blowout isn't commening as easily as they--or I--had assumed.

Yes, I had Penn State winning 42-10. And I'll continue to point that out to you all evening. Because already this game looks, at worst for Notre Dame, like it'll be close. And I'll be eating my words all night.

Penn State just got its first big gain of the evening, but Austin Scott fumbled after being hit by Tom Zbikowski. The Irish, who caused no turnovers last Saturday, have just created their second of this young first quarter.

Duncan just got flagged for his second false start. And he had one last week early on.

Penn State wins the opening coin toss, but has chosen to defer. Considering that teams must kick off from the 30 this season, that was all about not allowing Jimmy Clausen to ease into this game.

You look around this graying hulk of a stadium---at least on the inside it looks that way-- and you have to be impressed by its size and the volume of the fans. But the funny thing is, you see how they can expand it if they wished to. The endzone stands are higher than the sideline stands. This could be the first 130,000 seat football stadium some day.

Penn State's Kevin Kelly just booted it five yards deep into the end zone. So, no fumble for the Irish.

Here's Clausen's first snap as a starter...and the left side of the O-line moves. First and fifteeen. And we have the first mental mistake of the night for the Irish.

First pass, a screen to Armando Allen, is complete for five.

Second pass, a screen to Allen on the left, complete for a gain of fifteen.

Third play, a handoff to Allen on the right, tackled for a loss of one by No. 40, Dan Connor. They'll be seeing a lot of him tonight.

Fourth play, yet another screen left to Allen, gains 13. So the Irish have that left screen play down pat.

Last week Notre Dame did not complete its fourth pass of the game until the second half. Tonight they've done it in the first four minutes. If you're a Notre Dame fan, you cannot be any more satisfied with how Clausen has played on this opening drive. He's made every decision right so far, including tucking it and running twice.

The Irish have hit fourth down and are about to attempt a 50-yard field goal. I'm finding this hard to believe. It's long, but just a little short, I think. Still, Clausen was poised and accurate on his initial drive. Only one pass incomplete, and that because the receiver dropped it. Clausen also gained about 15 yards on two rushes.

Now let's see if the Irish offense has improved any.

Here's what Coach Paterno had to say earlier this week about the outcome of the Appalachian State-Michigan game:

"The greatest upset in the history of the world and the whole bit. I always thought when they put the devil down below, that was one of the great upsets of all time. the only trouble was they didn't take newspaper people with him."

Me, I took Lucifer plus the points. Besides, it wasn't God defeating Lucifer that was the upset. It was Johnny outfiddling him down in Georgia. Fire on the mountain/Run, boys, run.

The Notre Dame band just played a short pre-game show and the entire Penn State student body turned their backs to the show. Could be worse. If we were at Michigan State the "F___ You, Irish!" chants would already be at full throttle.

You know what's cool? What's totally cool? The Nittany Lion mascot outfit. They change mascot costumes as often as they change head coaches here, and it's awesome.

They just sang the Star-Spangled Banner. The students were singing about one line ahead of the band's playing the entire song. These Happy Valley kids are clever.

If I had to describe the climate, both emotional and atmospheric, here at kickoff, I'd say, "Helter skelter in a summer swelter."

Looking forward to hearing a lot of White Noise this evening.

I don't know how anyone in the crowd here at Beaver Stadium is going to locate a buddy without the help of text-messaging. This stadium's whiter than an Osmond Brothers concert (here's to 35 year-old jokes). It's even whiter than the press box, and that's saying something, especially since my bud Vaughn McClure of the Chicago Sun-Times has switched from covering Notre Dame to the Chicago Bears (one of the few college-to-NFL leaps in which your access to players increases).

Moments ago JoePa and Robot Genius met near midfield for a handshake.

JoePa: "What the #%*! is going on in Ann Arbor?"

CW: "We're starting Uncle Rico at quarterback today. Just thought I'd tell you."

Weis's endorsement of young Mr. Clausen as the starter this week ("I think he gives us the best chance of winning") reminds me of the days when my jayvee football coach, Fr. Sinnerud, put me atop the depth chart as the holder. He said those exact same words. Wait a second...coming back to me...that's right, it was "I think he gives us the best chance of whining."

Michigan student Michael Phelps is giving the Wolverines a halftime tutorial on how not to sink like a brick.

...in my basement back in high school, I would have been so much more popular. Wait a minute. I didn't even hav a basement in high school. As if any of that would have made a difference.

They're playing that Linkin Park tune "In The End" at about Volume 27 right now, and you can hear it all the way in East Stroudsburg. I mean, LOUD. Craig-Sager-suit loud. Lime-bikini loud.

Dollars Penn State has invested in its stadium sound system: Two bazillion.

Dollars Penn State has invested in its stadium press box air-conditining: Zero. I picked the wrong Saturday to wear a tie to the game, I will tell you that much.

Today's Bright Idea: Invent an alcoholic energy drink. Give it a really cool name. Suggestion: Boozahol . This would work, wouldn't it?

Oregon's up 32-7 on Michigan in the second quarter: "LLOYD!!!" . The Curse of the Dead Schembechler continues.

Seriously, if this holds up, might we hear a resignation speech later this afternoon?

Phoenix, trailing the series 1-0, is comfortably ahead in Game 2. So all we need now is for Shock forward Cheryl Ford (Karl Malone's offspring) to bodyslam Diana Taurasi into the scorer's table once the outcome is already decided and for two other Mercury players (whose names no one not on the Mercury would know...okay, maybe Doris Burke might) to leave the bench area. Who's the WNBA's dean of discipline? Sue Jackson?

Which reminds me: The Isiah Thomas sexual harassment trial begins on Monday. Good times there.

To prepare his Irish for the loud crowd in Happy Valley, Charlie Weis piped in ear-shattering Bon Jovi and Springsteen tunes at the Loftus Center this week. If he were looking for a theme song, how about the Boss' "Growing Up"?

Meanwhile, fellow Garden Staters Fountains of Wayne and Southside Johnny are pissed over the diss.

Reviewing some scores from earlier this afternoon....

Georgia Tech 62, Samford 0 midway through the third quarter... this still should not make the Irish feel good about last weekend.

Purdue 52, Eastern Illinois 6....Okay, the opponents are lamer than the idea of Dane Cook as a sex symbol, but four of Notre Dame's first five opponents have not put up 50-plus points in a game in the first two weekends.

3-2 at halftime at home against Akron, Buckeyes? And Oregon took Michigan's best first round flurry and still leads 18-7 in Ann Arbor? Minnesota needing overtime to beat Miami (OH) at home? It's Penn State or Wisconsin this year in the Big Ten Network.

Washington up 24-7 on Boise State in Seattle? What if Tyrone Willingham really does wind up having the last laugh?

Sorry about that header...just that it often feels as if this blog is simply an email dialogue between G.A. and I.

Just circled Beaver Stadium and the environs...Looks as if ladder golf , a.k.a. "Hillbilly Golf", is beginning to overtake cornhole as the tailgating recreational sport of choice. What ever happened to beerpong?

Also, on the eastern side of the stadium there's a moument to JoePa very much akin, in both size and design, to the Vietnam Veteran's Memorial on the mall in our nation's capitol. Which elicits this question: Is there a possible matchup in college football that has greater potential for one of its coaches to keel over during the contest? Answer: Is Kansas (Mark Mangino) playing Maryland (Ralph Friedgen) this season?

Strangest comment overheard as I walked amidst the Liquid Paper (I'm eschewing "White Out") Gang at Penn State: "How do you say 'Charlie Weis is a fatass in Russian?' "

Best T-shirts I've seen: "Rudy Was Offsides" and "Notre Dame: Losing Bowls Consistently Since 1995".
And a long-distance salute to the LSU fan in the College Gameday audience this morning who made the sign, "NOTRE DAME: NO. 1 IN ITS CONFERENCE".

Update: 4:14 p.m. and the Liquid Paper Student Section is already seated and howling.

ZITTANY LIONS?

Here's what you missed if you happened not to be in State College this morning. At 9:30 a.m. at The Nittany Lion Inn, Penn State professor Nina Jablonski gave a lecture entitled "Your Skin, Warts and All: The Evolution and Cultural History of Human Skin".

It is your largest organ, after all.

Eight Is Too Much

One reason you're hearing so much about how Notre Dame will fare in its first eight games? The Irish are the only school facing eight consecutive BCS conference opponents in their first eight games. Then, to further dramatize the disparity between ND's opening eight contests and the final four (Navy, Army, Merchant Marine and Salvation Army), the Irish have a bye week following that eighth game...at home versus Southern Cal.

Corso has the Irish starting 2-6. Kirk/Herbie the Dentist has them starting 3-5, as do I. Don't ask me how. Everlasting Blogstalker G.A. wonders what will transpire should the Irish finish 6-6 overall. "I mean, what BCS bowl will they be invited to?" he asks. G.A. is a Florida alum, it should be noted.

Greetings from Altoona, Pa., which is 45 miles south of State College and as close as my trusty colleague and all-around-invaluable NBCer Laura Harrington could find me a room. I don't want to say rooms are hard to come by this weekend for ND-Penn State, but I actually had to drive, leaving my apt., in the opposite direction from Penn State to find a hotel.

Friday afternoon. Sunny and hot. Driving on the two-lane highway that is State Route 64 here in Pa., blaring Eddie Vedder singing "The Long Road" on the America: A Tribute To Heroes CD as I pass by cornfields and verdant green hills. How much do you love college football!?! (no need to answer that). Tom Curran, you can have your trek through Lodi on en route to Giants Stadium ("must be pretty big if they named it that"). I love this game.

Stopped by Paternoville on Friday afternoon to check out the tent city. Felt as if I were at an REI clearance sale. There must have been nearly 100 tents pitched in the shadow of the southeastern (?) corner of Beaver Stadium. Off in the distance is Mount Nittany.

And just for your edification--I read the plaques-- it's called Beaver Stadium after James Beaver, a Civil War general, former Pa. governor, Penn State chancellor, and the man who helped get funds to launch a football program at State College in the late 19th century (back when JoePa had only been coaching for about ten or so years). And "Nittany" is a Native American word that means "single mountain". Now we both know.

Anyway, I waded through the student-campers clad in shirts with inscriptions such as "Rudy Was Offsides" until I found Brian Eller , a sharp-looking junior from Baltimore. Brian explained to me the entire camping out process. The idea is that you show up and there's a greaseboard with all the student sections at the front. You put in your name and the number of seats you and your friends want in a particular section, and then the Paternoville overseers tell you where to pitch your tent...so that there are lines for each desired section. On Saturday by 8 a.m. you must have the tent packed away and removed, and then it just becomes a matter of standing in line.

And when do they let you in?, I asked.

"Four p.m.," said Eller.

So after all this camping you'll still stand in line for eight hours to get the seat you want?

"That's right," he said.

Also chatted with Ross Beck, a Paternovillager who did not shake my hand because both of his were covered in chicken wing grease. "So they deliver to Paternoville?" I asked.

"Hooters did," Beck replied. "I called them up and said, 'I'm in Paternoville. I have no money. What can you give me?"

And whoever the very cool person at Hooters who took Beck's call said was, "We'll send you some chicken wings. Just pass out fliers for us."

I mean, really, ow much do you love this sport? If I could marry college football, I would. Some would say I long ago did.

Drove out of State College and my warped boss, Barry, phoned me to tell me about Hank "Henry" Hendricks , a back-up quarterback at the University of New Hampshire who was just arrested for murder. How bizarre is this story? First of all, Hendricks is from La Jolla, Calif. Who ever heard of a SoCal kid going to school at UNH? Then there's the aspect of Hendricks and a few others allegedly killing a pro surfer (back in La Jolla). Or that they're all allegedly part of a gang known as the "Bird Rock Bandits"? There are gangs in La Jolla? Geez, where did it all go wrong?

Next, I drove through the made-for-Hollywood mill town of Tyrone , Pa., which is nothing like Tyrone Willingham. At least I doubt it. I loved Tyrone because it looked exactly like the town where Stefen Djordjevic played his high school ball in "All The Right Moves" before Nickerson booted him off the team. And how, by the way, did Nickerson land that job at Minnesota State based on the way he coached this prep team in this movie? And where was Dauber?

Arrived in Altoona and as luck would have it the Notre Dame pep rally was taking place adjacent to my hotel. I'm always up for a good rally of pep, so I went. It was sponsored by the Notre Dame Club of Central Pa., I believe, and it featured the leprechaun (Matty Phipps, from Plano, Texas, I believe), the cheereleaders and select members of the marching band. Chuck Lennon, the ubiquitous and unsurpassed-in-passion N.D. alum who is a fixture at any rally of pep was there. Every school should have a Chuck Lennon. Or a John Lennon. Or a Liz Lemon, for that matter.
Anyway, the first alum who spoke (I'm guessing he was with the local alumni club) talked about how we could all be sure of a great performance by the band and a Notre Dame win. Then he backtracked and said that the latter may not happen. When you have a speaker at your own rally of pep conceding defeat, well, you might as well be on the Dennis Kucinich campaign trail (poor Kucinich...he's like the symbol of a feckless presidential candidate...what did he ever do to anyone? Mayb that's his problem).
The rally of pep also featured a cash bar, of which I availed myself. There's nothing like watching the cheerleaders perform the "Celtic Chant" uppercuts while you're downing a Vodka tonic. And even if there is, I suggest you try it.

Dinner: Well, you'd assume a college-over-NFL type such as myself would seek out a non-franchise restaurant over the architectural monotony of an Outback Steakhouse (although they have great food, I'll give them that) and so I did. If you're ever in Altoona (on holiday, say) hit the U.S. Hotel for dinner. The tavern there is awesome, too.

Actually, no fooling, Altoona is beautiful. At least in early September. The green hills and streams of south central Pa. inspire me to want to do nothing so much as go on a canoe trip with Jon Voight . I mean, if his daughter came along also and we all had Super-Soakers. How much fun would that be?

Ended the evening with a movie. Saw 3:10 To Yuma , a Western which I found very disturbing. Not because of the subject matter, nor because of the promiscuous gunplay. No, I found it disturbing because two of the principal characters bore eerie resemblances to good friends of mine who work at Sports Illustrated . Christian Bale, our hero who is channeling Robert Deniro in "Midnight Run" and Van Heflin in "Shane" (as well as Van Heflin in the original 1957 version of this very same film, whose character Bale is reprising), looks disturbingly like my wonderful friend Mark Beech (he's married, girls). And Ben Foster , who plays Russell Crowe's sidekick, looks an awful lot like my good buddy and poker pal Adam Duerson. In fact, I think their wardrobe is even the same.
For the record, if I had to pick one person in this film I most closely resemble, I'd go with Gretchen Mol.

Last word on this movie, or anything loosely associated with it. As a quasi-Arizona native, I notice that whenever I tell someone where I'm from, odds are the first thing they'll share with me is "I've been to Sedona!" or "I've gone out in Scottsdale!" No one ever says, "I've been through Yuma!" And with good reason.

Local note from Friday's Altoona Mirror : Former Penn State tight end Robert "R.J." Luke was ordered to pay $900,000 to fellow former Penn State student Jude Sandt. According to court documents, Luke and former linebacker Thurgood "T.C." Cosby (don't know what's up with the initials) punched Sandt and then threw him through a fraternity house window at Phi Kappa Psi fraternity house on July 29, 2001. Sandt's offense? He denied them entry to the party.

Judging from how they reacted, Sandt had good reason to do so. Luke, who later transferred to Western Illinois University, did not appear at the hearing and his whereabouts are unknown. But, seeing as how 110,000 fans are expected at tonight's game, there's a chance he might be here. And I'm sure Sandt, now a music teacher at Orefield Middle School in Allentown, would happily apportion some of the $900K that he has coming to him if anyone were to apprehend Mr. Luke today.
Where's Dan Evans when you really need him?

'80s Tribute Band for Which I've Come Up With A Name Even Though I Cannot Play An Instrument (just like Andrew Ridgeley):

Twisted Sister Christian Slater...And Zack

Today's Lineup

This Saturday and next are looking like, at least match-up wise, the two best days in college football this season. Here are the games I most cannot wait to see:

1. Oregon at Michigan....We all want to see how the Wolverines react, don't we? I think they'll win by 20.
2. Texas Christian at Texas....Are the Horned Frogs fu' real?
3. Boise State at Washington....As superlatively as the Broncoos have played the past five years, they are 0-12 against Pac-10 teams on the road all-time. This could be a huge win for Tyrone.
4. Virginia Tech at LSU....I actually think the Tigers will win this one going away. It's today's marquee matchup because of the rankings, but I doubt it will be the best game.
5. Miami at Oklahoma.... "I Love The '80s!"
6. Lenoir-Rhyne at Appalachian State...I had the Mountaineers No. 2 in my personal poll on Monday, three days before the AP came around to that way of thinking.
7. South Florida at Auburn....The Tiger offense looked less potent than Wade Wilson last Saturday night. This week's big upset?
8. Hawaii at La. Tech...As close as Colt Brennan will get to New York City this season until December, if'n you know what I'm a'sayin'.

Finally...it is impolitic to point out, but that's what blogs are for: I'm just wondering how African-American participants in tonight's game at Beaver Stadium feel about playing in a very rural area in front of a predominantly Caucasian crowd all of whom will be clad in white? Oh, like you hadn't considered that?

...Dear Mr. McDonnell,

About what I wrote last night?

Never mind.

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/2007/09/06/2007-09-06_rick_ankiel_received_12month_supply_of_h.html

...to redeem yourself.

Dwyane Wade, as SI Sportsman of the Year in 2006, was the worst decision anyone at SI's made since they moved out of the Time-Warner building (and some tool who resembles a gray-haired version of REM's Mike Mills attempted to fool the staff into thinking it was a "win-win" for us). Anyway, SI eventuallly wised up and moved back (bully for you, Mr. McDonnell--he's the SI grand poobah of editing) but they made a dumb move last year overlooking Roger Federer in favor of Mr. Wade. And that was all--and don't you think it wasn't--about selling newsstand issues, which in turn ups the stock price, which in turn keeps the stooges on the 33rd floor happy so that they don't have to cut jobs (as opposed to perhaps slicing their entertainment budgets).

Anyhoo, sometimes a managing editor of a magazine should just make the call that instinctively he knows is correct. He should stop thinking about the bluebloods with whom he lunches at Le Cirque and instead consider the face of a 10 year-old boy who cannot wait to get his issue of SI in the mail. If such boys still exist.

All of which is to say that if Rick Ankiel , who today belted two home runs and had seven RBI for the St. Louis Cardinals, is not the SI Sportsman of the Year at the end of 2007, then the people who make the decisions there may as well have their hearts encased in ice.

It's the right choice.
It's the courageous choice.
Now let's just see if they have the guts to make it.

There's a whole quarter left. If New Orleans can get a TD here - and that seems highly unlikely given the staggering work of their offense since the middle of the first quarter - maybe there's a little drama left in this opener.

But I doubt it. A lot.

continues.

He just got spun by Reggie Wayne on a 28-yard touchdown pass on what seemed a simple post. Haven't seen the replay yet but it didn't seem terribly complex.

Musta been the safety help. It's always the safety help. Or lack thereof. Ahem.

It's all ball bearings, these days, fellas.

So far, Drew Brees has 57 yards on 17 attempts (11 completions).

Yards per attempt is a generally accepted barometer of a quarterback's overall effectiveness (or at least it's passing attack).

An average up around 8 per attempt is terrific.

Brees is at 3 yards and change per attempt.

On the Saints last drive, he almost got picked on a first down throw to Devery Henderson. Henderson got loose against the Colts cover-2 but Brees failed to look off safety Antoine Bethea and he nearly came up with the pick on a deflection.

He seems a little addled.

INDIANAPOLIS - Peyton Manning has been brilliant down the field tonight.

Aside from a half-throwaway to the end zone intended for Marvin Harrison, he's completed (to my recollection) every throw longer than 25 yards - a 27-yard touchdown to Harrison, a 42-yarder on a third-and-7 that just set up the Colts score and a 39-yarder in the seam to Dallas Clark to set up the field goal.

He's only 10 for 22 but those incompletions have been, in part, because of his using very good discretion.

That wasn't a very impressive series for Reggie Bush, who got run down from behind by linebacker Rob Morris and cut the wrong way on a screen pass (right into the defender who was being obliterated).

On the Saints field goal drive, Bush had a drop on third down that ended NO's hopes of six.

Jason David is going to need a rubdown by halftime. Every time the Colts need a completion, they're looking to his side - the offense's left. Mostly, the Saints seem to be playing Cover-2 so, for instance, when Reggie Wayne just ran a crossing pattern, David let him go when he left his zone, but when he's man up in the zone, he's getting thrown at.

Four times by my count so far.

It's good to see drives, isn't it? For a first game, it's been crisp on both sides offensively and the hitting on defense has been terrific, especially from the Colts side. Guaranteed, you won' t see many games played at this level out of the next 15 played between Sunday and Monday.

I've been focusing on Tony Ugoh, the Colts rookie left tackle. Not bad so far. He did give up a pressure to Will Smith on a bull rush which resulted in a third-down incompletion but Smith does that to a lot of tackles.

New Orleans appears to be out of sync in the running game. Indy's run 11 times for 61 yards.

Oop, there goes Jason David atoning for his scorching with a strip of Reggie Wayne and a 55-ish yard return for a score.

Former Colts corner Jason David, now with the Saints, made it through 13 minutes with his new team without allowing a touchdown.

Then Peyton Manning just went over his head to Marvin Harrison on a beautiful, beautiful throw for a 27-yard TD.

7-0, Colts.

The Saints offensive game plan involves plenty of Reggie Bush.

So far he's been featured on an end-around, a draw, downfield as a wideout and on a screen.

He hasn't done anything outlandish yet but it will be interesting to see if Indy does anything to shadow him.

Addai is back in for the Colts.

On an entertaining sidenote, I get the best e-mails.

My man Doug is getting feedback on his TV. Tony and Sherry want Al Michaels to pronounce New Orleans correctly. And Debbie in Cheektowaga said the anthem was "Roseanne Barr bad."

Oh yeah, and I said the Colts were World Champions and a reader is irked because the Colts are only the U.S. Champions. I wonder how they would have done against the Belgian Ewes in pool play.

Joseph Addai got crunched on the first play from scrimmage, taking a shot in the gut from a Colts DB in an incomplete pass in the flat.

He's out and Kenton Keith (you remember Kenton, don't you) is in.

Bad news already for fantasy guys.

Addai should be back soon, He walked off.

The atmosphere in the RCA Dome is electric. If there's a word to describe the Colts fans tonight, it would have to be...grateful.

The last time this team played a game here was the AFC Championship when they were getting their collective heads handed to them by the Patriots. Another offseason of what-ifs seemed in the offing.

But that second half against the Patriots will wind up being the greatest 30 minutes of football ever played in this stadium. For that and for what followed, Indianapolis - en masse - is giving thanks in the runup to this game.

The Colts win the toss.

The Ravens got a one-year extension done with backup Kyle Boller.

Here's the Ravens statement.
"This is good news for us," said head coach Brian Billick. "We have said all along how important Kyle is to this team, and this secures him for at least another season for us."

Said Boller, "I am ecstatic."Baltimore is the place I really want to be. The Ravens have the best organization in the NFL, and I feel very fortunate that I'm going to continue to be a part of it. I have a great deal of respect for Mr. Bisciotti, Ozzie Newsome and coach Billick. I'm thankful for the confidence they've shown in me, and hopefully, I can play here for a long time."

The Ravens expressed tepid interest in free agent quarterback Byron Leftwich. It will be interesting to see how the Boller extension impacts that if at all.

In John Cougar's "Smalltown" song, there was a line that said, "Married an LA darling brought her to this small town, now just smalltown, just like me."

I admit I'm not a regular reader of "People" so I missed the news that John's not with that wife. Too bad. Always sad.

But check out the updating in the new version, "My wife was 13 years old when I wrote this song, now she's smalltown, just like me."

Yeesh. That's like having to change a tattoo.

INDIANAPOLIS - So there's a massive gold ring in one of the end zones that, presumably, the world champion Colts are going to run through. The thing has to be about 15x15 with a little blue horseshoe on the top that lights up and lights on the side and a replica Lombardi Trophy on the top.

My question is, what do they do with the thing when tonight's over.

That would be a tremendous souvenir for your man cave, wouldn't it. Need a big cave, but still.

Quiet, John Mougar Cellencamp is singing now. Apparently, he was born in a small town. Probably Lilliput. Dude's short.

INDIANAPOLIS - So this is wholly unrelated to the Sunday Night Football opener which kicks off in an hour - I'm getting to that, by the way - but what's with the eye-rolling every time someone contends that there's not really a helluva lot of difference between dogfighting and hunting?

Mike Florio, the diabolical genius behind Profootballtalk.com castigates Terrell Owens for being the latest to mention that there's some similarities there. And T.O.'s right. In neither case does the animal end up in awesome shape.

Florio points out one pertinent difference - one is legal and the other is illegal. Maybe that means the dogfighters just need better lobbyists.

Legal or not, it's hard to imagine a duck, deer or itty, bitty rabbit caring whether or not the guy who put a cap in his furry ass was within his rights when he pulled the trigger.

No question, dogfighting is in a different zip code than hunting but they're in the same area code. The biggest difference, to me, is that you're actually trying to kill the animal while the "winner" of a dogfight gets the chance to be mauled another day. Bullfighting, which cultured Americans may observe while on holiday abroad, is probably a closer relative.

Anyway, Owens, who told Jim Gray he attended dog fights with his uncle as a kid in his native Alabama, said, "Being from the South, that's something that's very prevalent in that area," he said. "So when I say it's a cultural situation, I'm not trying to bring a racial barrier into it. If anyone wants to dig that up, I will dispel that."

Owens is right. Early on in the Vick process I spoke to John Goodwin from the Humane Society and he told me that dogfighting is country, it's urban and it's even upper crusty and international. It's not about black or white. It's about having grown up in a culture where life - be it animal life or human life - is more disposable.

Sorry I was unable to blog last night. I was at the Crazy Dogggz concert. Big concert. Giants Stadium ("How giant is it?").

On to the blog...

HE'S BETTERER, HE'S FEDERER

Last night I was actually surfing between the Andy Roddick (New York's other A-Rod last night)-Roger Federer match at the U.S. Open and Goodbye, Mr. Chips on TMC. Cool move by TMC. In honor of most kids' first week back at school they had a theme night of inspiring teacher films: "To Sir, With Love" followed by "Goodbye, Mr. Chips" followed by "Dead Poets' Society". At least that's my guess as to why they did it. "Mom, I didn't get my homework done because I was busy watching Sidney Poitier shape up some limey hooligans."

How Mark Harmon's tour de force performance in "Summer School" failed to make the list, by the way, I'll never know (Courtney Thorne-Smith was truly a minx back then!).

Roddick played about as well as he possibly can (losing the first two sets in 7-6 tiebreakers...which may be redundant) but you know how it is in the racquet sports. If you've ever played tennis or racquetball or even table tennis (i.e, "Balls of Fury") against a superior opponent, you know that after awhile their better shots will just wear you down. Upsets, I don't think, are as common in tennis.

So, I'm not the first to say it, but I'll put forth the notion once again here: We are currently watching the two best ever at the country club sports who ever lived: Tiger Woods and Roger Federer. Give them each five more years at their current levels of hegemony and it won't even be debatable. That's a huge conditional, sure, but I think you'll see it.

Doggie do's and doggie don'ts/doggie wills and doggie wont's

Great Moments In Racial Tolerance

I'm on line (express, 10 items or less) at Whole Foods this afternoon. Standing right behind me are three cheerful, talkative teenage girls. Probably college freshmen or high school seniors. All are African-American. As we approach the monstrous checkout counter (at least 35 or so checkers waiting on you) we pass by the magazine stand. One of the girls notices a mag with Brad Pitt on the cover.

"Brad Pitt, he's so sexy!" she exclaims. "He's the only white guy I'd ever--"
Then she notices me standing in front of her.

"Don't mind me," I say. "He's the only white guy I'd ever..., too. Okay, maybe Clooney also."

Later it occurred to me that I should have mentioned Denzel Washington in some fashion. When I related the anecdote to Moose, currently known as Maliboose (because she spent much of the past week hanging out at the Malibu pad of a certain absentee famous actor who'll go unnamed here so that his peeps won't find this on GoogleAlerts!), she suggested that instead of mentioning Denzel I would have been better off mentioning Nick Cannon .

"Who?!?" I asked.
"Exactly," replied Maliboose.
"Nick Cannon?" I asked. "Are you sure that's not his porn name?"

Favourite Shirts (cont.)

You Johntouragers, you proud citizens of RumiNation, you've been wondering about the infamous, the notorious "$350 Shirt". So here it is:

http://www.ralphlauren.com/category/index.jsp?categoryId=2568342&cp=1795706&SMR=1&ab=ln_men_categories_shirts

Now, if that fails to show up, go to ralphlauren.com, Men's, Purple Label, Shirts, and then No. 9.

If I were my good friend Steve Rushin, I'd probably opine right now that "the shirt on my back cost me the shirt off my back."

Have you read about Danny Baugher , the punter whom the New England Patriots cut last Wednesday? Baugher was apparently quite upset--and who can blame him?-- with having been released. He took out his anger while intoxicated on his 54 year-old father, Erle, by punching him in the face at about 4 a.m. the following morning.

Police in Hingham, Mass., where the incident occurred, have charged Baugher with assault. But those of us in RumiNation believe that the crime should be renamed "Attempted Ex-Patricide ".

Oh, and here's the kicker, for this punter. Baugher's previous NFL team? The Cincinnati Bengals.

Like John Anderson and Scott Van Pelt (the best SportsCenter duo since Dan and Keith), I am bemused by the "____ Nation" phenomenon taking place. Red Sox Nation was the genesis (actually, it all began with Carrie Nation, a turn-of-the-century temperance movement advocate who'd literally walk into bars with a hatchet and wreak havoc) and that was fine because it was original. But now there's Buckeye Nation, Mariner Nation (Mari-Nation?), Steeler Nation, and, if the Bears fail to make the playoffs, Hiber Nation.

There's more nation-building taking place in sports than in the Middle East.

And so, not wanting, for once, to swim against the tide, I am hereby dubbing, or J-dubbing this blog....

Ordinarily, I love Tony Kornheiser and what he has to say, but just moments ago he joined the Bill Simmons-Mike Francesa-Chris Russo "I Don't Watch College Football, But Here's What I know About College Football So Listen Up" School of Idiocy.

On "PTI" Dan Lebatard attempted to make the point that while this was an upset, it was not the gridiron version of Miracle On Ice. And Kornheiser peremptorily (I should get points just for using that word) and emphatically slammed him down with all the condescension we've come to expect from NFL types. While Lebatard attempted to speak, Kornheiser accused Lebatard of parroting Lou Holtz (and after all, what does Holtz know about college football?) and saying this wasn't an upset...whereas Korny called it the biggest upset in college football history.

Which it was not.

A great upset. Sure. A thrilling, unexpected outcome. To be sure.

But first things first. Tony, did you know that four Michigan defensive starters were among the first 47 players chosen in last April's NFL draft (You should at least be paying attention to the NFL end of things here). So what I'm saying is that 8% of the top 47 players chosen in the NFL draftt, out of all those I-A, I-AA, and II and III teams, 8% of the players came from Michigan's defense. Can you say, "Dropoff", Tony? This is not the same Michigan team that traveled to Columbus unbeaten last November.

Second, it's not as if Appalachian State is a bad team. They only have the nation's longest winning streak in I-A or I-AA (don't hit me with the "subdvision" appellations while I'm discussin' Appalachian), at 15 games, and have won the last two national championships in their division. There are no shortage of teams (including Notre Dame) that Appalachian would not only have beaten last Saturday, but would beat without even sneaking up on them this Saturday.

The biggest upset in college football history? On the season's first weekend? Michigan had done zip to earn that No. 5 ranking. And App. State is quality. Temple, which is perennially woeful, beating Virginia Tech in 1998 was a huge upset. Probably bigger than this. Even USC losing its 1991 home opener to Memphis, 24-10, may be a bigger upset. The Trojans were bad that year, but Memphis? At home?

If you think App. State is not worthy because they're only the best team in I-AA, then you weren't watching the Boise State-Oklahoma game last January. The outcome of which, like Saturday's game, was no fluke. And please do not be at all surprised when the winner of the Boise State-Hawaii game is playing in the BCS national championship game next January. Don't think it can happen. Stay tuned, Tony.

Gameday.

It's like Christmas. Except it's every weekend. You hang flags instead of lights. You eat burgers and wings instead of ham and fruit cake. You drink beer instead of wine. Santa Claus wears a headset, paces on the sidelines and brings gifts in the "W" column. You wake up and you simply.. Just. Can't. Wait.

I got a text from my little sister at 9 in the morning yesterday: "Gameday mi familia! F L O R I D A S T A T E!"
Another text came in at 11: 45 "You coming tonight?" The phone rang throughout the day, friends making sure everyone would be at our spot ready to go for Bowden Bowl. Garnet and gold shirts, ones that haven't been touched since last December, were finally dragged out of the bottom of the dresser, ready for action. Another text: "Go Noles!" The same two words filled my inbox for 30 minutes before kickoff.

I stepped out of the cab and even though Tallahassee, Florida is a thousand miles away, walking up to the bar felt like home. The tomahawk chop was ringing on the streets of New York. The city that is too busy for college football, the part of the country that doesn't quite 'get it', the great Big Apple was taken over on a small corner on the west side by a bunch of crazy kids all ready to root for their favorite team.

Gameday.

Kickoff starts. And damn we looked good on that first drive. FACT: illusion. The great Jimbo Fisher has some work to do. Rick Trickett better find an offensive line.. fast. I might be able to run faster then Drew Weatherford. First half and all we could muster was one first down. ONE. Eight punts and seven straight three and out... are you kidding?

About the beginning of the second quarter those texts changed to

8:38 "Uh oh. I'm pulling for ya'll."

8:39 "That's why we play 60 minutes!"

8:42 "Uh.. we'll be good next year? Or something."

8:55 "Little Noles need to pick it up."

**The "We are a second half team" mentality begings about now.

9:11 "Ummm.. at what point do we stop watching."

10:19 "I wish ESPN would get rid of Holly Rowe and hire you." (The little brother is very supportive!)

10:21 "Still learning third down here... gotta stop em."

11:16 "Go FSU! We can do it!"

12:10 "After watching the FSU game I will now plummet 2 my death off of my 2nd story apartment."

That last one is a little dramatic... but still. As frustrating as the first half was, the second half showed a different team. Mistakes? A ton. (Dear Mickey Andrews, a few of our guys forgot how to tackle last night. Exactly, I'm not sure how either, but I know you will fix this. Immediately.) But it did show a team who managed to gather themselves together after a complete meltdown in the first half. Aside from the fact that my heart was stomped on after totally believing we would win in the final 2 minutes only to see Weatherford get pounded into the ground AGAIN, I haven't totally given up on us. Here's why...

It wasn't exactly so long ago when we were at the top. FSU only lost 13 games over the span of 10 seasons. I was a freshman when we won our second national championship. We lost to Tennessee the year before and to Oklahoma the year after that.. both national championship games. We finished in the Top 4 or higher (twice number 1, three times number three) every year for a decade. Why does this matter you ask? Because after games last night, its easy to forget.

I also hold out a little faith because consider the changes in the off season: new Offensive Coordinator (Fisher), new Offensive Line Coach (Trickett), Return of Chuck Amato, new Receivers Coach (Lawrence Dawsey) and new Running Backs Coach (Dexter Carter). I'm no football genius, but I do know one thing. Alllllll that doesn't gel in one summer or one game for that matter.

So I'm giving them a little time. They are my team after all.. and you don't give up on your team. Especially on gameday.. and nothing beats that. Not even Christmas.

And so do you.

After last nights loss to Clemson (more on that later), this little clip has made my day slightly brighter.

Anyone a fan of The Office? Michael Scott wants you to watch.

(Update: The blog below was typed on Tuesday morning, hours before Charlie Weis announced that Jimmy Clausen would start at Penn State this Saturday. My editor, Barry, wonders if this will be the most well-documented case of a (an Oaks) Christian being thrown to the Lions since the Old Testament)

Top Jimmy cooks. Top Jimmy swings.
He's got the looks. Top Jimmy, he's the king.

Charlie Weis, let me make this easy for you.

Jimmy Clausen

Later today, Charlie will sit before the media inside the auditorium at the Guglielmino (why can't donors at Notre Dame have shorter names? Guglielmino? Debartolo? O'Shaughnessey?) Athletic Center and inform the media who will start this Saturday at Penn State.

Jimmy Clausen

The Irish were home last Saturday against an unranked, albeit superior and certainly more experienced and poised, Georgia Tech squad. Notre Dame lost by 30 and if Taylor Bennett could throw with more accuracy than Taylor Dayne, it would have been by at least 40. In four days the Irish travel to the unfriendly wilds of central Pennsylvania (I mean, the Blair Witch is a season-ticket holder) to play before a hostile crowd of 110, 000, before a team that will probably be ranked in the top 15 when this week's rankings come out, a Nittany Lion team that was embarrassed in South Bend last September. Or did you forget that Travis Thomas ran a fake punt with the score 34-3 late in the third quarter that went for 43 yards? And this contest will be taking place in prime time on national television. No Big Ten Network shenanigans taking place here.

Jimmy Clausen

Penn State won 59-0 against Florida International last Saturday, a foe, we'll remind you, that finished 0-12 last season. The worst loss in Notre Dame history? 59-0 to Army, in 1944, at Yankee Stadium. That's an interesting coincidence, but the Irish won't (shouldn't?) lose that badly this Saturday. Then again, whether or not the Irish win this Saturday (they won't) is not important. What Notre Dame needs is to step off the crossroads on which they stand and head in the right direction. The Irish appeared like nothing so much as they did Dorothy, Toto and the Scarecrow standing at the intersection of Yellow Brick Road and Main last Saturday, unsure of which direction in which to head. And the longer they stand there, singing about being off to see the wizard, etc., the longer the remainder of this roster stagnates.

Jimmy Clausen

I have not watched as much tape of football as Robot Genius, but I have spent nearly four decades obsessed with the game, played it in an organized fashion for six years and even played quarterback for three. And, so, as presumptuous as it may seem to suggest, if you watched last Saturday's game from start to finish and couldn't fathom that Top Jimmy is the quarterback who should start--and finish--games for the Irish, well, I might be inclined to ask Miss South Carolina for directions before you.

And it's not about the statistics. Evan Sharpley was 10-13 passing, after all, which is Bradyesque. But he was also sacked seven times, which is Kosarian. Clausen, in garbage time, was 4 of 6 passing.

But it's not about that. It's about the intangibles and fundamentals that you see if you've been watching quarterbacks your whole life. Fundamentals such as:

1. Footwork... Clausen is simply pretty to watch in the pocket. Whereas Sharpley plods and Demetrius Jones displayed happy feet in the pocket if he had to pass, Clausen understands when to be nimble and when to stand tall. Yes, he was sacked once, but only because James Aldridge was late in coming to pick up the blitz.

2. Arm Set-Up...Sure, there are some unconventional passers who have been very successful. Vince Young, for example. Watch Clausen, though, as he gets set to pass. His arm is cocked so that the football is right up next to the right earhole of his helmet. The form is flawless. I could be peddling instructional DVDs on ESPN2 at 3 a.m. with that type of form. That textbook form is why his passes are so accurate.
Sharpley is not a bad passer. But his most important completion of the afternoon, a 4th-down conversion late in the third quarter, was actually thrown behind Robby Paris. The Georgia Tech defender tipped it, and that's what allowed Paris to make the catch. Clausen, in contrast, made more throws that needed to thread the needle, and he hit, in his limited time, his receivers right on the numbers.

Jimmy Clausen

If last Saturday's game was any indication, then the Notre Dame band might want to learn how to play Talking Heads' "Road To Nowhere" this season. But the Georgia Tech game was--or at least should be--an anomaly for the Irish. An aberration, not just an abomination. If the Irish can improve this season, both in terms of confidence and in performance, then the lumps that they take in the first eight games will be constructive as opposed to destructive.
The question Charlie Weis must ask himself is, Which quarterback will take us into the future? Because Weis, an inveterate tape watcher (that's how he first got noticed by Bill Parcells), the Ebert of game films, can see as plain as anyone that this is not a top ten team (and I'm being kind there). So he should devote himself to rebuilding (yes, I said it) this team and returning it to glory.
Evan Sharpley is a fine backup, but he's not the future.
Demetrius Jones is a fine runner and a gifted athlete, but under a coach who loves to pass as much as Weis does, he's miscast. Tim Tebow of Florida is a terrific passer who can also run. Jones is a decent runner who has yet to prove he can pass. And while it may not seem fair that Jones's chance to play QB at ND came against a blitzing, experienced defense that exposed an immature offense, it's more of a chance than most people who've ever wanted to play QB at ND ever received. Either someone shows Jones photos of Arnaz Battle and Carlyle Holliday--Notre Dame QBs who transitioned to wideout and are now earning NFL salaries--, or Weis makes him a situation Antwaan Randle-El type, or Jones transfers. But he is not the quarterback of the next two years in South Bend.
It's Jimmy Clausen. He thinks like a quarterback. Moves like a quarterback. Throws like a quarterback. And you know what? He wants the job and knows he can do it. And that's more than you can say about a lot of his teammates this week.

It was written (by me, no less) two weeks ago, and I'll stand by it. Whoever starts versus Michigan State on September 22 is Notre Dame's starter for the rest of the season. Charlie Weis may want to protect Clausen--or even Jones--by not exposing them to the hostile elements of State College and Ann Arbor the next two Saturdays, but Tom Zbikowski and Trevor Laws and John Sullivan, etc. deserve to have the best player under center that the Irish have to at least give them a fighting chance at competitiveness. And if this dumb scribe can see that it's Clausen, I doubt that they cannot. As a simple courtesy to his fifth-year seniors ("who graduated", as Weis pointed out last Friday night), he should start Clausen.

The Jags lopped off former franchise hood ornament Byron Leftwich today, a day after announcing that backup quarterback David Garrard would take over the starting job.

Also among the Jags cuts: linebacker Nick Greisen and DT Seth Payne.

The Atlanta Falcons today traded CB/KR Allen Rossum to the Pittsburgh Steelers for an undisclosed draft pick.

"It’s always tough to lose a person like Allen Rossum on your football team, however we feel confident in Adam Jennings’ abilities as a returner,” said Falcons President & General Manager Rich McKay. "We feel this move is in the long term best interest of our club."

In five seasons with the Falcons, Rossum totaled 5,489 kickoff return yards, 1,731 punt return yards and three touchdowns. He also contributed with 66 tackles as a cornerback.

Vinny Testaverde has been untethered by the Patriots. Along with him, the Pats cut loose two second year players - Bam Childress, a wide receiver, and Garrett Mills, an H-back, tight end hybrid who couldn't stay healthy for the club.

Mark it down: At 8:46 of the 4th quarter, Jimmy Clausen made his Notre Dame debut. He handed off to James Aldridge, who went off tackle right for seven yards.

There goes the redshirt year.

We'll wait and see if he can throw....

Pass to Hord, deep. Incomplete. Overthrew him. So the elbow's okay.

In 1912 Notre Dame opened its season at home with a 116-7 win over St. Viator. This afternoon will not remind anyone of that day. In fact, if this score holds it will be Notre Dame's worst loss ever in a season-opener.

Gimme an "R!"

Gimme an "E!"

Gimme a "B!"

Gimme a "U!"

yada yada yada

Okay, that sentiment is about 90 minutes late.

Good News for the Irish: They've avoided the shutout.

Bad News for the Irish: Next week's opponent, Penn State, won 59-0 this afternoon. And Michigan State, the Sept. 22 opponent, won 55-18. So, unlike Georgia Tech, those teams have offenses. Even if they were facing FIU and UAB, respectfully, that's a lot of scoring. How many games will it take for the Irish to get to 59 points this season?