IRISH APRIL

Jimmy Clausen, according to the local writers, has looked like a new man during spring practice. After a 3-9 season, obviously fans are looking for reasons to be optimistic anywhere they can find them, but if Clausen's made a quantum leap, or even a decent-sized jump, from his true freshman year, that will go a long way toward the Irish finishing on the right side of .500 in 2008.

And, by the way, before anyone dumps on Clausen, you have to remember that this was a true freshman dealing with first-time starters at both wideout positions and running back. And playing behind a line that allowed 20 more sacks (58, as compared to 38) than any Irish line ever had. Yes, some of those sacks were Clausen's fault, but certainly last season was not one in which you'd want to trade places with the Notre Dame QB.

-- You can't always trust numbers on rosters when it comes to weight, height, or (Hola, Senor Tejada!) age. That said, listen to the increase in poundage some of the Notre Dame offensive linemen are reporting after a winter of buffet dining at Bruno's Pizzeria here in South Bend:

Right tackle Sam Young: 330 pounds, up from 315 pounds

Center Dan Wenger: 300 pounds, up from 282 pounds

Left tackle Paul Duncan: 308 pounds, up from 292 pounds

The two other starters, Michael Turkovich (RG) and Eric Olsen (LG) are both a Dorito's bag north of 300 pounds. The Irish will have an entire starting O-line of 300-plus pounders in 2008, and the designated sixth man, Chris Stewart, goes a modest 339.

--Maybe the most drama involved with today's game will be who the next Irish offensive captain is. Team captains--one offense, one defense, one special teams--will be named after the game. My guess is that Mo Crum will be defensive captain, David Bruton special teams, and, in a move designed to bolster everyone's confidence, Jimmy Clausen will be named offensive captain.

 
I FEEL THE EARTH MOVE

Spent Thursday night on an air mattress at the Chicago home of my old buddy, Marty Burns. He's Mr. NBA Power Rankings on SI.com. Anyway, Marty lives between the L train stop at Roosevelt and State and the Amtrak line, each of which is less than half a mile away. Mr. Burns is the only man I know who lives both on the wrong side of the tracks and the right side of the tracks.

Anyway, it was about 5:30 a.m. when I was awakened by a rollicking in the night. The bookshelf wobbled, as did my mattress. For a moment I feared that I was having yet another dream about Helen Mirren. Then I simply surmised that it must be one of the trains passing by, a la Brad and Gwyneth's apartment in "Seven".

Wrong, and wrong. Turns out that it was an earthquake that was based downstate and registered a 5.8. I have to say, I quite enjoyed the little earthquake (isn't that a Tori Amos album)?

ROTHSTEIN

Truly I live a fabulous and glamorous life, because on Friday night I also shared sleeping quarters with a male sportswriter. Last night it was Rothstein, alias Michael Rothstein, the gadflyesque (if not Gatsbyesque) Notre Dame beat guy for the Fort Wayne Journal Gazette.

So we've got twin beds in my hotel room (Rothstein stays with me for travel purposes, not because the two of us just love the company of another sports writer at bed time) and we're watching Craig Ferguson just before nodding off. Rothstein is nearly asleep when the show's announcer says, "Coming up, Kristin Bell."

Rothstein (sleepy voice): "Did he say Christian Bale?"

Me: "No. He said Kristin Bell. You know, Veronica Mars....although that would be a cool couple, wouldn't it?"

Rothstein (sleepier voice): "Hunh?"

Me: "Christian Bale dating Kristin Bell. How often do you get a chance to date your homonym?"

Rothstein (sleepiest voice): "That's going to be in the blog, isn't it?"

Rothstein writes an excellent Notre Dame blog, by the way. Check it out.