December 2008 Archives
A word about bowl sponsors. First, the Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl. Is that one sponsor or two? And just how much oomph does Bell Helicopter get by sponsoring a bowl? I mean, how many people do you know who go helicopter shopping unless they have a check from the Pentagon?
"Darling, wouldn't the kids just love it if we bought them a helicopter?"
"Great idea! But not just any chopper. Let's make it a Bell Helicopter! Hmm. I wonder why that particular brand came to mind."
Also, the Roady's Humanitarian Bowl. If you tuned in, you learned that Roady's is basicaly the modern-day Stuckey's that I grew up with, an interstate oasis with all the amenities: fuel, coffee, beef jerky, showers and maybe even a movie theater (you need to be driving west of the Mississippi to appreciate the necessity of such places).
Still, my experience is the following. I either 1) Notice the gas gauge is past "E" or 2) have to take a No. 1 so badly that, well, there's no need for Prescription Flomax or 3) both. Most likely it is 3. And at moments such as those, I don't care who operates the rest stop. It could be the Bates Motel and Gas n' Sip for all I care. It can be that service station in the beginning of the film The Hills Have Eyes. I don't care. I just need fuel in and fuel out.
So why bother advertising?
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Just heard on the radio that the Arizona Cardinals are still 6,500 seats shy of selling out their first home playoff game in more than six decades. Now, according to NFL rules, if you don't sell out the contest 72 hours before kickoff, it is blacked out locally. Well, through the munificence of the National Football League, they've decided to extend the deadline 24 hours. How kind of them.
I don't blame the Cardinals. And I certainly don't blame the fans. On my list of top ten sports pet peeves please find, "Local sports radio host who exhorts fans to show support for their team by purchasing tickets." Like you need a guy who gets into the game via a media credential to tell us how to spend your cash.
Meanwhile, for just two people you're looking at no less than probably a $200 afternoon with the Cards, once you factor in the cheapest seats ($55 per), parking (which I believe is $30), and then brews and grub.
At moments like this I recall what my friend Steve Rushin chose as his topic when SI did an "Overrated/Underrated" issue. Steve's choice: "Most Underrated Seat: My Couch". As he wrote: "You know those billboard signs that read, 'If you lived here, you'd be home by now?' Well, I do live here and I am home."
The view is unobstructed. The beer is cold. The bathroom is clean. Sure, it may be boring. You have less chance of happening upon a couple having random-stranger sex in the midst of a blowout (poor word choice there; sorry), but it's a lot less hassle. Especially since University of Phoenix Stadium is, for those Valley dwellers who live on the East Valley, tantamount to driving to California.
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Would it be fair to call "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" a "going of age" film? You know, as opposed to a "coming of age" film.
My friend Katie (America's funniest woman in print) renders the following review:
I apologize in advance to anyone who reads this and takes offense; I'm sure all of the people who worked on this film are lovely and will win awards and go on to work on far duller projects. Many spoilers shall occur, so discontinue reading if you intend to see it and don't want the plot ruined. But be warned: bring a pillow.
Brad Pitt is born into the body of a really old baby. His mother dies and his horrified father abandons him on the steps of a nursing home, where he is adopted by the wise and benevolent Queenie. She loves him and raises him without batting an eye, putting her faith in God that all will turn out well. Several hours and a few years into it, Old Kid Brad meets Daisy, a precocious and beautiful dancer. They flirt, repulsing all, especially Daisy's grandmother. Old Kid Brad, who has now morphed into Old Young Man Brad, joins a tugboat crew and wracks up a few life experiences, most notably getting his own boat tugged for the first time. He goes to Russia, puts on a ridiculous David Crosby wig and gets it on with Tilda Swinton. World War II comes, some other stuff happens and I take a short nap.
Oldish Brad and young woman Daisy meet up again. She's a self-absorbed (edited for blogavision).
Older Gentleman Brad follows Daisy to New York and gives her flowers. She rejects him. She goes to Paris, gets hit by a car, he turns hot and she's still a (edited for blogavision).
He turns really hot. I mean really, really hot. Daisy realizes it and starts being nicer to him. They (have a scene of intimacy).
Now in love, they move in together and she has a baby. Hot young Brad, having learned apparently zilch from the woman who raised him, bails because he finds the situation creepy. He goes on a montage of various worldly activities that require him to be sweaty and shirtless and wear a fetching headband. Ten years pass and he returns to Daisy, who is now 307 years old. He looks about 14. He meets their daughter, a gangly teenager who couldn't possibly be the genetic result of a Cate Blanchett/ Brad Pitt coupling. My butt falls asleep again. He leaves once more, she finds him again and takes care of him until he dies in her arms, a beautiful, 85-year-old baby.
Oh, and sporadically throughout, we are treated to trying to interpret what Cate Blanchett is saying through her English Patient makeup.
It wasn't terrible. It was just sooooooooooooooooooo looooooooooooooooooooong. And it does have a really nice moral, which is only 40 year olds are worth having sex with.
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If you watched the Sun Bowl today, you are correct in wondering how Notre Dame allowed 24 points in regulation to Pitt. The most difficult part of assessing the 2008 Notre Dame football season is attempting to determine which loss was the most avoidable. Was it...
A) North Carolina
B) Pitt
C) Syracuse
d) Will Yeatman
On Friday, the New York Jets will interview in-house candidates Brian Schottenheimer and Bill Callahan for their vacant head coaching position.
Giants defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuolo will interview on Saturday.
Schottenheimer, the son of longtime coach Marty, is the Jets offensive coordinator. Callahan, former head coach of the Raiders and Nebraska, is the team's assistant head coach/offense line.
...Here's what I don't understand about Prescription FLOMAX: If I have the particular problem for which they have the cure, am I not in the bathroom during the breaks in play when their ads are playing? How do the Flomax folks reach their target audience? And how come the dudes in the ad can't wait for their buddy to zip up before they shoot their "great moment" photo?
"Hi, I'm Chris Leak, and I'd like to talk to you about Prescription FLOMAX..."
Clearly, I've been watching too many bowl games.
...might I suggest Papajohns.com? "Dad, can we download a pepperoni?"
By the way, have you noticed how rarely ESPN's cameras provide panoramic stadium views during these December bowl games? I wonder why that is.
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Two sorta-kinda interesting bowls on tap today. I mean, not good enough to keep you inside if you're here in Arizona, where it's 70 and cloud-free. Not even if you can get yourself to The Tilted Kilt in Tempe (where we watched some NFL yesterday, though we beat a hasty exit when the manager did not see fit to put the Dolphins-Jets game on any of the trio of monster screens...putting the Cowboys-Eagles game on two of them).
The Tilted Kilt, by the way, is located just a long punt away from the Arizona Cardinals training complex. And it has waitresses who dress and look like this. I'm sure nothing Deadspin-worthy ever transpires here.
(But, hey, despite such pulchritude, we scrammed. Sports bar managers should take care to know what games to put on the big screens, no? As I barked to no one in particular, "Perhaps if New York were a major city, or if anyone had ever heard of their quarterback, or if this game didn't have an off-the-charts vengeance factor..."
Anyway, you know how you and your buddies sit around during games and say, "We should open a sports bar with plenty of cold beer, lots of imported labels, monster screen TVs, and ridiculous babes as waitresses. Yeah, we should do that. We'd be rich."
Well, these guys did. And they are. Their business model ("Hooters in plaid") is pretty straightforward, but with 14 locations, it seems to be working. Here's my suggested slogan: "The Tilted Kilt: We're Tart'in!"
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Jets coach Eric Mangini has been fired, a league source told the website Profootballtalk.com. A press conference is scheduled for 2:45 p.m. Jets GM Mike Tannenbaum and owner Woody Johnson will be in attendance. According to PFT, Mangini will not be.
I just made a call to the Jets and Tannenbaum is in a meeting and unavailable.
Mangini was hired by New York in 2006. He led the Jets to the playoffs that year but the team bottomed out to 4-12 last year. This season, the Jets were chugging along at 8-3 before losing four of their final five games. Sunday's 24-17 loss to Miami at home was, apparently, the final straw.
Mangini and Tannenbaum are very close so expect a lot of hand-wringing at 2:45.
Meanwhile, it will be interesting to see where Mangini lands in 2009 or beyond. There was much speculation that, after the Patriots were turned in for illegally videotaping the Jets in the first game last season, Mangini would have a tough time finding a landing spot with another team having "ratted out" his former employers.
A Boston Globe story this morning confirmed our report from Sunday that Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is behind schedule in his recovery from ACL and MCL surgery in his left knee that was peformed October 6.
While the first two paragraphs of the story, citing sources close to Brady, maintained our story was "inaccurate", the next two paragraphs of the four-paragraph story, in essence, confirm what we reported.
They read: "Brady is having some range of motion issues, common in patients who suffer an infection. Fighting an infection causes a greater buildup of scar tissue, which makes it difficult to fully bend and extend the leg. As a result, Brady may need to undergo arthroscopic surgery to clean up scar tissue to improve mobility.
The removal of scar tissue, however, would help Brady rehab more effectively and not cause any significant delays. Typically, an athlete can resume his regular rehabilitation a couple of weeks after such a procedure."
If, after a surgery performed October 6, Brady still is having "range of motion issues" that may require a second surgery, how then could he have done enough rehabbing to be "ahead of schedule" as two other Brady sources told NBC's Peter King?
And if, nearly 12 weeks after surgery, Brady's spent six of the weeks battling an infection and still needs a scar tissue removal procedure that means "an athlete can resume his regular rehabilitation a couple of weeks after such a procedure" I'm not sure how that makes anything we reported Sunday inaccurate.
Do the math. Six weeks of infection. Scar tissue still present limiting range of motion and, thus, making full rehab as yet impossible. Removal of scar tissue (still pending) and the "couple of weeks" to rehab from that?
How that puts Brady ahead of schedule or makes the Patriots decision on whether or not to franchise Matt Cassel in two months easier is beyond me.
After the Jets touchdown, Dolphins kick returner Patrick Cobbs fielded at the goal line, stepped back into the end zone then stepped back into the field of play before stepping back once more and taking a knee.
Should have been a safety, right? Well, the officials ruled that the "entire ball" didn't come out of the end zone when Cobbs made his jab step out of the end zone. On first down from their 20, Chad Pennington hit Ted Ginn on a flea flicker for 44 yards.
Five plays later, Pennington found Anthony Fasano for a 21-yard touchdown making it 21-17, Miami.
The Jets saved a tiny bit of face (the end of their nose? a portion of their forehead?) with a half-closing field goal by Jay Feely that makes it 14-9. The Jets still trotted from the field under a cascade of boos.
Meanwhile, the Ravens have things well in hand in Baltimore, leading 24-7 over the Jags. A Ravens win eliminates New York.
So far, Brett Favre is 4 for 14 for 56 yards with a TD and two interceptions. On the touchdown pass he just threw to Miami's Phillip Merling, Favre banged his right elbow on the turf and is flexing it as if it's sore.
With 2:18 left in the half, the Dolphins took the lead on a 60-yard drive that ended with a 27-yard touchdown pass to Ted Ginn in the left side of the end zone.
The, on the first play of the ensuing drive, Favre's screen to Thomas Jones was picked off by Phillip Merling and returned 25 yards for a touchdown. It's now 14-6 Miami...just...like...that.
A Brett Favre-to-Laveranues Coles touchdown pass from 13 yards away (but Coles covered 45 on the circuitous run after catch) made it 6-0, but a poor snap (and poor placement) resulted in the Jets not even getting the point-after airborne. So it's 6-0 and - after a three-and-out by Miami - the Jets have the ball back with the first half draining away.
Meanwhile, the Ravens are now up 17-7 over Jacksonville. If the Ravens win, the Jets are out of the playoffs whether they win or lose.
Courtesy of Mike Reiss' blog on boston.com, Patriots running back LaMont Jordan was asked about his feelings on having to root for the Jets to beat the Dolphins to get in the playoffs: "We have to hope that Brett Favre is as great as the media makes him to be."
On cue, under pressure, Favre just hit Jerrico Cotchery on a crossing pattern for a pickup of 26. New York is at the Miami 28.
EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. - Nothing on the scoreboard yet at Giants Stadium as we're early in the second quarter in a scoreless tie.
Chad Pennington just had an interception wiped out because Jets corner Ty Law had Ted Ginn locked up for an illegal contact penalty.
The Jets also dodged a bullet when, from the Wildcat formation, Miami ran a reverse that ended with Pennington throwing down the sidelines for an open Ricky Williams. Williams dropped it.
The Jets have also survived a Brett Favre interception. Another from the "just fling it" file. Defensively, the Jets look pretty good. (Actually, they just recovered a fumble off a strip-sack and are in business at midfield with 10:38 left in the half.
EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. With the Patriots inching toward a victory in gust-ridden Buffalo, this game between the Jets and Dolphins takes clearer shape.
If the Dolphins win, they win the AFC East. If they tie (yeah, right) they need a Ravens win to get in.
The Jets, meanwhile, will need to win and have the Ravens lose to get into the playoffs as a Wild Card.
So with the Patriots domino having fallen (they're up 10-0 late in the third), the only remaining variable for these teams is what Baltimore does.
Meanwhile, it's about 55 degrees and blustery here. Currently, Dolphins kicker Dan Carpenter is going through his warmups and has had no issues knocking them through up to 40 yards.
Lessons from Saturday night's bowl games in how one play can change the entire complexion of a game. The bizarre aspect of this is that both plays took place around the same spot of the field and were somewhat similar.
First, the Champs Sports Bowl in Orlando, which matched Florida State against Wisconsin. And, as an aside, Graham Gano, you're already on my All-Dubs Bowl Team. Anyway, the score is 14-6 Seminoles early in the 3rd quarter and FSU has the ball at about its own 30. The Badgers had just taken the opening kickoff of the 2nd half and marched down for a field goal.
So, FSU, on 1st-and-10, tosses a quick flareout to a wide receiver Bert Reed. The Badger DB jumps the route and arrives just a moment after the ball does. As Reed is being tackled, behind the line of scrimmage, the Badger DB is ripping the ball out of his grasp while also torquing around him like a cylcone.
All in one movement, Reed is down but the ball is now in the Badger player's grasp. The referee signals Badger ball as up in the booth Brad Nessler (highly underrated), Bob Griese and Paul Maguire debate the call. The short answer is, FSU ball. The Seminoles take the second chance and extend the drive all the way for a TD. What could have been 'Sconnie ball in Seminole territory, down just 8 points, turns instead into a 21-6 Seminole lead.
And suddenly the Badgers abandon their run game (unwise) and before you know it FSU has put up three more TDs to take a 42-6 lead. Final score: 42-13.
There are more than 100 plays in any one football game, but some just mean more than others. If the replay official does not overrule that call and Wisconsin goes in to score, I think we've got a tight game the rest of the way. But he did, and FSU pounced on the opportunity. Give them credit for that.
My only problem with the overruling is this: There were two camera angles. On one angle, you can definitely see that Reed's knee is down, but the ball is on the other side of his body. At that moment you cannot tell whether he or the Badger possesses it. On the other angle, you can see when the ball is in the Badger player's grasp, but you cannot see Reed's knees. So my question is, By looking at these two angles, how could any official claim to have incontrovertible evidence as to when Reed's knee was down in relation to when the Badger player took it away?
If, like me, you get the feeling that you and your friends could do a better job as replay officials, well, we're all not alone. Replay officials are ordinarily semi-retired, highly respected refs. But, as I said, they're semi-retired. If you've ever driven with your grandpa, then you know the problem with this.
For me, this call was ridiculous not because it was obvious that the UW player had ripped the ball away from the FSU player before he was down. Rather, it was ridiculous because the ref on the field signaled UW ball and there was absolutely no video PROOF that his call was incorrect. And that, purportedly, is what you need to overturn the call. Not what you think. What you can prove.
Also, we need to run a clock on the replay booth. You've got 60 seconds to get the call right. If you need more time than that, then plainly your eyes could not discern enough evidence to overturn the call. Am I the only one who finds this obvious?
It's never too early to begin thinking about the 2009 season. Then again, if it ever were too early, right now, less than 72 hours after the Hawaii Bowl, would likely be that time.
Nevada, with an outstanding rushing attack (2nd nationally) and its unique "Pistol Offense" (a shotgun formation, except that the QB lines up a couple yards closer to the center), visits South Bend next September 5th, only about 253 days hence.
The Wolfpack are paced by quarterback Colin Kaepernick. Running backs Luke Lippincott (the WAC's rushing leader in 2007, but injured most of this season) and Vai Taua (the WAC's rushing leader this season, and 9th nationally at 118.33 yards per game) are each extremely dangerous.
Nevada, coached by College Football Hall of Fame (not HoF-worthy; no, he's already been inducted) coach Chris Ault, will be a far better season-opener opponent than was San Diego State. Then again, the team waiting for them will be much improved, also.
You can catch the Wolfpack (who are 3rd nationally in rushing defense) on Tuesday as they face Maryland in the Humanitarian Bowl from Boise (and, early warning: it isn't Nevada-Reno; it's Nevada; they're a little sensitive about that).
Anyway, after the jump, one blogger's extremely preliminary prognostication on what the 2009 Notre Dame starting lineup will resemble, with some notes afterward. Returning starters--players who started the majority of the 2008 season-- appear in boldface type.
Merry Christmas, everyone. Enjoy.
‘Twas the night before Christmas,
When all through the den,
The plasma was tuned to the ESPN,
The fade route was hung by the pylon with care,
In hopes that young Golden soon would be there,
The O-line was lit as if by a fuse,
With visions of blocking for Allen, or Hughes,
And Charlie on crutches, not unlike Tiny Tim,
Though his face not so pale, and his eyes not so grim,
Joined by Chuck Jr., his son now a teen,
Two Weis men from the east, a nativity scene,
On a Hawaiian island, Notre Dame is marooned,
Give thanks in green jerseys they are not festooned,
The voice on the tube, it did give quite a scare,
We wanted Pat Haden, but got Andre Ware,
While up in the press box, scribes scatter like mice,
No, that isn’t Santa, it’s a lei’d Charlie Weis,
When, what to my half-drunken gaze should arrive,
Than the Domers are gaining plus yards on a dive,
With a little-used halfback, and now he is scorin’,
Poor Pops--too much eggnog—in the corner is snorin’,
Then Clausen broke huddle, while Gramps he broke wind,
And as Jimmy called names, I sat and listened:
“On Rudolph, on Duval, on David, on Tate,
Let’s put positive spin on the season ’08!
Run routes with a fervor; please give it your all,
And, do me a favor, just don’t drop the ball.”
Like ravenous orphans when at table do sup,
The crazed Irish defense did bark,“Crank me up!”
With the speed of eight reindeer the 'backers were blitzin',
While Corwin did send nearly all of his Smiths in,
Then behind the safety young Golden did go,
Intent on not hearing, “That’s ten in a row.”
Bowl losses, that is, for they all knew the score,
N.D. hadn’t won one since Jan. ’94:
Buffs, Buckeyes and Beavers, the latter school twice,
Had helped forge a record so naughty, not nice,
An ACC trio extended the drought,
Plus two to the Tigers, and both were a rout,
But tonight, in Oahu, ‘gainst placider climes,
Look, Ma, in the end zone: a touchdown for Grimes!
And when Armando returned a kick all the way,
The children, all ages, were merry and gay,
Who knew that this school could provide us such mirth,
On the eve of the date that its namesake gave birth?
And when it was over, the scoreboard proclaim:
Hawaii 21; 49, Notre Dame,
49 points? In a bowl? That’s a first,
For the men of South Bend, who of late have seem cursed,
Or at least apathetic, uninspired, or lame,
It was as if they’d forgot who they are: Notre Dame!
But tonight on the shores of the 50th state,
Where brides and Barack often go to vacate,
Some pride was restored, and hope came alive,
That next year we may crack the ol' Top 25,
And Charlie was happy, that much you could see,
He needed a win near as much as a knee,
Back home in our p.j.’s, we readied for sleep,
With grins as we thought of the ’09 two-deep,
While out past the ocean, where honeymooners play,
Charlie opened the presser with, “Fire away!”
Then he boarded a plane, this descendant of Knute,
Saying, “Merry Christmas to all, now I’m off to recruit!”
Jets wide receiver Laveranues Coles wasn't too psyched when the Jets traded his close friend Chad Pennington to make room for Brett Favre.
And throughout the year he's made passive-aggressive comments about Favre to the media. Nothing overt, always going up to the line but not crossing it. Always careful to leave enough room for plausible deniability if confronted with the notion he's ripping Favre. It seems the source of his ire isn't Favre but the Jets treatment of Pennington. Favre is merely the conduit through which he can make that ire felt.
Now with the Jets and Pennington's new team the Dolphins ready to take on Favre and the Jets this week with the AFC East on the line, Coles is making sure it's clear where his personal allegiance lies when it comes to Brett and Chad.
Acknowledging he spoke to Pennington Tuesday night, Coles was asked th difference between the two men. "They are two different people. That is pretty much it."
Asked how much it must mean to Pennington to have the chance to play the team that sent him packing, Coles said, "That’s a question for Chad. That’s not a question for me. My personal opinion doesn’t matter and I really don’t care to speak about it. That’s a question for Chad."
Asked how he expects Pennington to perform, Coles said, "I don’t know. I expect him to show up. I will tell you that much."
If you think we're making a mountain out of a molehill, here's the backstory. When Pennington was released, Coles went into a shell with the media refusing to speak at all.
In early December, he was speaking with the San Francisco media when he clearly indicatd Favre was getting too much credit for the Jets success at that point. "If you understand the game, you understand that it’s more than just Brett Favre in dealing with this ballclub. Of course, he’s the big name. He’s the (future) Hall of Famer and he’s going to get the majority of the credit. But most of the guys who deserve the credit don’t really get it.”
He made his peace with Favre and the two men - who locker next to each other - have shown no outward animosity. But Coles' sniping continues.
Hey, thanks for keeping up with the blogeration this year. Appreciate the clicks and eyeballs even when you might thoroughly detest my narrow views and smug, skinny head.
I got some wrapping to do, (I am the human beat box) before we light out for the hinterlands.
Meanwhile, check out the weekend picks for the AFC and NFC games that matter this weekend.
And while you're at it, here's Rising and Falling for this week.
Like you, I read the headline this morning ("Lance Armstrong expecting baby with girlfriend") and my first thought was, "Which one?"
Turns out it is this one. Not this one. Or this one. Or this one. Or this one. Or, come to think of it, this one.
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As Letterman once said, "Come See Our Johnsons!"
It's early, and I haven't watched every minute of every bowl, but my All-Bowl Season team will definitely include Colorado State running back Garrett Johnson (285 yards rushing in the New Mexico Bowl) and Boise State safety Jeron Johnson, who is a Rodney Harrison-type thunder bringer.
By the way, Boise State D-lineman Byron Hout had the top play of bowl season so far with his interception and spin move last night (heretofore known as "The Poinsettia Pirouett-i-a"), but a more alert ESPN producer might have typed his name onto YouTube and discovered this deja vu moment. And, by the way, "Woo Lake City Roles!"
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Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose
So, via the miracle of the interweb, and the munificence of NBC.com, I'm working my way through Season 1 of FNL and simply marveling at all the real-life parallels. For example, Coach Taylor's Matt Saracen-or-Voodoo dilemma seems awfully prescient when you look at what happened this season at Ohio State. Boeckman-or-Pryor, although I doubt Terrelle would be so uncool as to change Smash's music at his first party.
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Hawaii Bowl
If you had, "Notre Dame playing on Christmas Eve/President Elect topless" on the same Hawaiian island in your 2008 predictions, you win. If you want to keep closer tabs on the Irish (for example, cornerback Gary Gray did not make the trip to the 50th state, and Charlie won't say why....Gary Gray= Gray Area), check out my buddy Brian Hamilton's "Aloha Blog" for the Chicago Tribune.
That's my latest tip for metropolitan New York City headline writers.
I mean, geez. Why doesn't Commissioner Selig just set up a meeting with HankHal Steinbrenner and say, "Cut us a check for $500 million and the World Series is yours"?
And I'm a Yankee fan. Or used to be. That's okay. Should my loyalty sway, I'm sure HankHal will buy me back into the fold.
By the way, HankHal are paying Teixeira (as a matter of fact, I would like to buy a vowel....and I can afford it) $180 million over 8 years. Thirty-six years ago, their pop bought the New York Yankees for $8 million. That's backup catcher change these days.
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We're less than an hour away from the Poinsettia Bowl kickoff. Boise State versus TCU. This is actually watchable. Even intriguing. I like TCU, narrowly. The Horned Frogs will win their second Poinsettia Bowl of the past three years. Keep an eye on Horned Frog defensive end Jerry Hughes.
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Thought for the day: Wouldn't it be awesome to see Benjamin Button at his 10-Year high school reunion?
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If you've seen both Slumdog Millionaire and Milk, maybe you'll find this funny. It's from a real conversation I had:
Thing 1: "I liked them both, but I don't know if you can say that one movie is better than the other. They're different."
Thing 2: "Yeah. For example, there was no all-cast breakdance scene during the closing credits of 'Milk'."
Thing 1: "Woulda been cool, though."
Thing 2: "Yeah, that woulda been cool."
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Reports on the web claim that Notre Dame offensive coordinator Mike Haywood has agreed to terms to become the next head coach at Miami of Ohio. This is Haywood's first head coaching job, and this makes him the sixth African-American head coach for the 119 available jobs in the FBS.
I assume that Haywood, a Notre Dame alum, will handle the play-calling for the Red Hawks, who finished 2-10 this season.
Notre Dame has a little coaching history with Miami. Former Irish head coach Ara Parseghian played at and first became a head coach at Miami, taking over when Woody Hayes left for Ohio State.
Love how the fan catches the snow chunk and hoists it over his head. And after watching this video, pretty safe to say that Shaun Ellis completed the snow farther than Brett Favre completed a pass all game long.
James "Shack" Harris, the Jacksonville Jaguars Vice President of Player Personnel who lost a power struggle with head coach Jack Del Rio, tapped out today.
Gene Smith, takes over for Harris. Smith has been with the Jags since their inception in 1995. Harris was stripped of many duties early last offseason.
Harris and Del Rio both joined the Jaguars in 2002 and their schism developed over the quarterback position. Harris backed Byron Leftwich. Leftwich and Del Rio couldn't stand each other, hence, Del Rio ultimately replaced Leftwich with David Garrard. Worked well in 2007 when the Jags made the playoffs and the previously lame-duck Del Rio got himself a five-year extension. Hasn't worked well this year as Garrard's been a turnover machine compared to 2007 and the Jags are 5-10.
Old Mike Florio at profootballtalk presaged this development on Monday.
All these people out of work in Detroit, and Rob Parker has a job. Doesn't seem fair.
Parker, as you probably know, is the dude who asked Detroit Lion head coach Rob Marinelli if he wished that his daughter, whose husband is the Lions' defensive coordinator, had married a better defensive coordinator. This after Detroit had just lost 42-7 at home to go to 0-15.
In a lighter moment--and when is the last time they had one of those in the Motor City-- I can see where Parker's query might be humorous. This was not one of them. And to imagine what Marinelli, who is a Vietnan War veteran and who has been face-to-face with life-and-death adversity as opposed to 0-15 adversity, must think of Parker is beyond comparison.
There's provocative, and then there's just plain dumb. It's the difference between being Charles Barkley and....Rob Parker. There's also the sense of propriety...and timing. The "Other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?" joke probably didn't draw as much as a smirk until the 1950s.
The problem is that too many people who make decisions in my industry (editors, producers, etc.) don't understand the difference between provocative candor and simple immaturity. If you've seen Parker appear on ESPN2's "First Take" in the past, then his question shouldn't have surprised you. He came across on the show as someone who says something just to be radical, but then takes absolutely no accountability when his opinion is demonstrated to be ludicrous.
Finally, I don't know how old Mr. Parker is, but someone needs to teach him how to apologize (something I am an old hand at doing). Parker said, "I want to publicly apologize to Rod and his family--" He should have stopped there. Instead, he added, "...if people really thought I was being mean-spirited."
Rob, an apology is like a formal suit. The simpler, the better. When you're the one in the wrong, you don't get the privilege of deciding the conditions of what should or should not have offended someone are. You either are sorry or you're not. There's no halfway. The people who say, "I"m sorry if you were offended" are the same people who say, "No disrespect but...." and then go on to say something disrespectful.
(That's why I love the Jay Bilas-Dan LeBatard exchange from last March. Bilas, on LeBatard's radio show, tried to be nice by saying, "No offense..." to a line of questioning that he found way out-of-bounds. LeBatard was baiting him on race and Bilas, a lawyer, is far too smart for that. When LeBatard pointed out the incongruity of saying, "No offense, but...", Bilas shot back, "Then take offense." I love Jay Bilas.)
The Lions may lose next Sunday in Green Bay and be the first team in NFL history to finish 0-16. Parker, on a national stage, has lost much more.
In the past week, two head coaches press conferences have yielded "teachable moments" about my profession.
The first I'll mention occurred Sunday when Detroit Free Press columnist Rob Parker badgered and interrupted Lions head coach Rod Marinelli with combative questions during a postgame press conference after the Lions dipped to 0-15.
I'm a big fan of direct, hard questioning in press conferences. Reporters are not paid to make friends with their subjects. They are paid to elicit responses to issues that need addressing. If a subject doesn't like the question, too bad. A line of work where your self-assessment and media interaction aren't part of the job description isn't hard to find.
Persistence is good too. I've employed it. It works well. But you don't interrupt the person answering the question. You don't belittle their answers. And you don't ever mention anything about anyone in their family that could be construed as belittling to that family member.
Parker hit on the hat trick, asking Marinelli if he wished his daughter married a better defensive coordinator than Joe Barry, the Lions defensive coordinator. This after Parkers askied a string of questions in which he talked over Marinelli.
(Aside: I know Eagles coach Andy Reid's sons got arrested two seasons ago and he had to field questions about that. Different circumstance than this since an arrest is "news" as opposed to a decision to get married).
Parker said he was trying to be funny. I've seen his schtick with the detestable Skip Bayless on ESPN's First Pizza. He's not within 1,000 miles of mildly amusing. He's awkward, forced and not at all imaginative. Like this guy, kinda.
On Monday, employing the time-tested non-apology apology of the truly clueless and callous, Parker said on an ESPN interview, "I apologize if people really thought I was being mean spirited and trying to embarass the family in that way. That was not the intent. There was an intense exchange and i was trying to lighten the mood later in the press conference."
I'll let you in on a secret. Every writer and TV reporter knows that the press conference setting in 2008 has the potential to make them a part of the story as much as the person holding the press conference. If the coach or player makes a fool of himself, melts down, makes a funny, whatever, that answer will be replayed ad nauseum. And if the questioner gets himself involved, he'll get some pub too.
Last year, before the Jets played the Patriots for the second time, Bill Belichick was deflecting questions about Eric Mangini in the wake of Spygate. I get along well with Belichick and often ask him football-related off-the-board questions to get him to lighten up. I've asked him in the past if he minded the goofing and he said he welcomed it. So - on a whim - I asked him who his favorite former Cleveland Browns ballboy was. Mangini had been a ball boy for Belichick. Belichick waited a beat and said that his favorite ball boy was his son Steven.
Now I knew the question was going to have a usable response when I asked it. But eliciting a usable response about Mangini was my aim, not getting on the TV. That the question itself became part of the day's news was, in my view, collateral damage. The news was that Belichick wouldn't talk about Mangini, even going so far as to find a way to not talk about Mangini's time as a ball boy for the Browns.
Sometimes, when a press conference is going nowhere, you have to ask a question that moves the person along. It's just the way it works. The only thing Parker was interested in moving along was his reputation which, to be honest, ain't very good.
The other instance - and I'll keep this one shorter - was an exchange between Bengals head coach Marvin Lewis and Dustin Dow from the Cincinnati Enquirer.
Lewis didn't like that Dow asked questions with a negative bent. He told Dow he wouldn't be answering his questions any more. And that maybe the Enquirer needed to send another reporter down to cover the Bengals (is that a threat or a reward?).
Now maybe Dow's been unprofessional in the past but nothing about his line of questioning on this day was out of line.
Lewis should remember a couple of things about his particular situation as head coach of the Bengals. He coaches a team that plays in a stadium that almost entirely financed (94 percent) by the taxpayers of Hamilton County. And recent studies have shown that the $453 anted up in the initial price tag was a pipe dream. It's going to cost those taxpayers closer to $1 billion. It is, perhaps, the most evil example of corporate welfare in professional sports since the team sucks, the city's bleak and depressed and the original cost and real cost were about 550 million apart.
So any question about how the people who've benefited from the generosity of Hamilton County taxpayers - the Bengals - are using their money is in bounds. As long as the questioner is respectful and not belligerent.
There. Have a nice holiday.
5 Questions for Week 17 I'll take the liberty of answering myself.
1. What Will Fallout Be If Jets Lose To Miami?
The Jets went all-in for 2008. Rebuilt their offense and defense with shrewd free agent moves. Traded for one of the greatest passers in NFL history. Got that noodle-armed impediment to success Chad Pennington out of New York, finally. And now? The Jets are in third place in the AFC East with a game remaining. The Patriots, going through 99 percent of the season with a seventh-round scrub named Matt Cassel, who hadn't started a game since high school? They're ahead of the Jets. The Dolphins, 1-15 last year and using Pennington as their quarterback? They're ahead of the Jets. Since getting to 8-3, New York's lost three of four. And the game they won, against Buffalo, was a gift from the Bills. Nothing dooms a regime more quickly than a late-season swoon. But Jets GM Mike Tannenbaum seems to have ingratiated himself thoroughly with Jets owner Woody Johnson. And Tannenbaum and head coach Eric Mangini are tethered together. Or at least seem to be. It would be interesting to see what Tannenbaum would do if he was told Mangini had to go. Or what Mangini will do if he's instructed to throw assistant coaches overboard. Even if they lose to Miami to fall to 9-7 and miss the playoffs, bet on Mangini and Tannenbaum staying put on very, very thin ice. The X-factor? With the Jets moving into a new stadium, the public outcry over this debacle could be so great that Johnson has his hand forced by his advisors in a business move.
2. Who Told You Chad Was Better Than Brett?
This guy. Right here. Look, you guys love to point out when I get it incorrect, lemme take a victory lap on this one. Before, during and after the Jets trade for Favre, I warned that New York was importing a wild card player with poor game management skills and not enough regard for the on-field work of his teammates to play conservatively when he needed to. And they were exporting a true professional in Pennington. A guy whose relative lack of arm strength became the easy millstone to hang around his neck. If having a strong arm was the most important asset for a quarterback, Kyle Boller and JaMarcus Russell would be gearing up for the playoffs. Accuracy and decision-making are the two top attributes a quarterback can have. Whatever is third is a distant third. The mythology of Favre far outdistances the reality. He's Allen Iverson in shoulder pads. Tough. Exciting. Wildly gifted athletically. An interesting character. Meanwhile, Pennington is Steve Nash. Creative without being unnecessarily risky. Unwilling to mortgage everyone else's efforts because he thinks he can do it alone. Sticking with the Iverson-Nash comparison: I'll buy a ticket to watch either but I'll start a team with Nash, thanks very much.
3. Least Deserving Prospective Playoff Team?
There are lots of candidates. San Diego. Denver. Arizona. Dallas. Jets. Gimme the Broncos, though. Even though the Chargers could get into the postseason with an 8-8 record while the Broncos will be in the postseason with a 9-7 record if they take out San Diego, there's no doubt the Chargers are a superior team. Actually, if Denver wins the AFC West, I'm ready to say they are the worst division winner of all time. Consider this: Denver is in first place yet's been outscored by 47 points this year (349-396). Not counting the Triple A division known as the NFC West, there's no other team in first or second place that's in the red in terms of point differential. In fact, the only team since 1985 that finished in first with a negative point differential were the Seahawks in 2004 and 2006. And they were only off by six points and two points respectively. The 1985 Browns won the AFC Central with an 8-8 record and were outscored by just seven. Meanwhile, the Cardinals are making a run at being the second worst division winner of all time. They're 8-7 and have been outscored by 12 since losing their last two by a combined 64 points.
4. Does the No. 1 Seed Really Matter?
Damn right it do. It was pointed out to me last week that only once since 1993 have the No. 1 seeds in each conference met in the Super Bowl. On the flip side of that is that at least one of the No. 1 seeds have made it to the Super Bowl in each of the last 10 years. And since 1980, 25 of the 27 Super Bowls contested had at least one of the No. 1s playing in it. So you can take it to the bank that either Tennessee or the Giants are going to Tampa Bay.
5. Who's My MVP?
Glad you asked. It's Matt Ryan. Coulda been James Harrison, Peyton Manning, Chad Pennington, Albert Haynesworth, Eli Manning or Steve Smith. But the player who has overachieved the most, who has done the most unexpectedly excellent job that his team would have been utterly lost without is Ryan.
This just in: Rod Gilmore is still in shock over Colorado State's decision to throw a fade route into the end zone in the final seconds of the first half. Rod, baby: it's the New Mexico Bowl. Why play it safe? The pass went for a TD, by the way.
I'm warnin' y'all, this will NOT be a comprehensive review of the weekend's games: I've just returned to the ancestral home in Devil's Gulch, Ariz., and had better things to do all weekend. After all, the new Nelson De Mille novel is out and also, and I know that I am soooooo late to the party on this, but I finally took some time to see what all the fuss is about Friday Night Lights and, well, where can I buy a Dillon Panthers T-shirt?
A few quick thoughts and observations:
1) It took about 1.5 seconds after first seeing J.D. McCoy for me to begin calling him "Mini-Hansbrough". Honestly, does he not look more like someone who should be Tyler Hansbrough's little brother than the dude who actually is Tyler Hansbrough's little brother?
2) Tim Riggins, you are my hero. For so many different reasons. As my sister-in-law Lori says, "He's tough, but he's nice." Lori, a teacher not unlike Tami Taylor, also says, "This show is the best part of our week." Oh, and by the way, Lori and my brother's oldest daughter, i.e. my niece, attends the Dillon High of the Phoenix area, Hamilton High School, which just took state for the third time in three years (coached by Notre Dame alum Steve Belles)
3) Tim Riggins. J.D. McCoy. Landry Clarke. Coach Aikmen. That can't all be coincidence, can it? Names that evoke memories of Lone Star gridiron heroes (and, in Riggins' case, a villain).
4) Love the "Devil Town" promo.
5) You think the dude who plays J.D. McCoy's dad went to Marv Marinovich for guidance? Or Uncle Rico?
6) In Matt Saracen's "wide receiver tryout" out on the street in front of Coach Taylor's home, someone should have coached him about how you need to catch the ball with your hands out in front of your body.
7) My suggestion for the rest of Season 3: Introduce a character who is the sports editor of the Dillon High student paper, and call him "Will Leitch". And at a certain point in every episode, Buzz Bissinger (the dude who started this entire FNL mess, anyway, with his outstanding book) has a cameo as an unnamed parent who confronts the sports editor, saying, "I think you're full of (cow patties)."
Anyway, I do love this show. And I hope everyone had just one coach or teacher akin to Eric Taylor.
Clear eyes, full hearts, CAN'T LOSE!
A pre-playoff playoff game. That's what the Chargers and Broncos will lock up in next Sunday night in San Diego. Thanks to the freefall in progress by Denver, they are now at 8-7. And thanks to the late-season push by the Chargers, they're at 7-8. The winner takes the AFC West. The loser laments.
The Broncos will not be feeling too chipper heading into this one. Following up last week's 30-10 loss to the Panthers with a 30-23 loss today to Buffalo, the Broncos showed precious little killer instinct. Which is the way they've operated during most of their schizo 2008. They've got losses to the Raiders and Chiefs on their resume this season - teams with six wins between them. Denver also has a 41-7 demolition by the Patriots - another team outside the playoff bubble at this point - on its record.
"Unfortunately we’re not going to be able to go up (to San Diego) and take it easy," receiver Brandon Marshall told the media after Sunday's loss. "We’re going to have to go up there in their back yard and prove to them that we're better than them. They're a good team, they're playing better now, and they've got all the momentum."
The Chargers, if they finish in a tie with Denver, will win the division based on a better record within the AFC West.
San Diego knocked off Tampa Bay in Florida on Sunday, 41-24 as Philip Rivers threw four touchdown passes. The Chargers have been dead and buried on several occasions this year but are still breathing. Their win over the Bucs was their third straight and came on the heels of a bizarre 22-21 win over Kansas City that included a Houdini-like final minute escape.
"I think we are playing like a playoff team. ... Hopefully it's not too late," said Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson.
We'll see Sunday night.
The Panthers and Giants are showing right now why they are battling tonight for the top seed in the NFC. They can run the football very well.
DeAngelo Williams just banged in from the 5 to make it 14-10, Carolina. The key plays on the drive mostly were on the ground including a 16-yard field reversal by Williams. Thirty of the 66 yards came on the ground in the drive.
On the Giants touchdown drive, 45 of the 74 yards came from the combo of Brandon Jacobs and Derrick Ward carrying the ball.
A little more than halfway through the second quarter, the Giants have rushed for 76 yards with Jacobs (back from injury with a bang) leading the way with 40. The Panthers have run for 71 yards including a 23-yard run by wide receiver Steve Smith.
Ben Roethlisberger deserved to be mentioned as an MVP candidate for his performance this season. But a poor performance today against the Titans in a game Pittsburgh needed in order to earn the No. 1 seed will take him out of the running for that.
The reason? He took points off the board for his team and put them on for Tennessee.
On the Steelers second drive, Roethlisberger fumbled at the Titans 1 on third-and-goal.
On the Steelers first drive of the second quarter, trailing 3-0, Roethlisberger got strip-sacked at his own 40 and the Titans turned that into a score to make it 10-0.
After leading two TD drives to make it 14-10 in the third, Roethlisberger got picked on a third-and-2 at the Tennessee 47. The Titans turned that into a touchdown on their ensuing drive.
Finally, with the score 24-14 and less than a minute left, Roethlisberger capped his day with a pick returned for a touchdown by Michael Griffin for a 34-14 final.
So Big Ben turned it over four times and was sacked six times. While the offensive line takes blame for that as well, the buck stops with the QB in terms of ball security and he didn't show enough of it. So the Steelers wind up the No. 2 seed overall in the AFC. Tennessee takes the top spot.
Wow. The Lions got their eyes pried out with a wooden spoon by the Saints, 42-7. In Detroit.
I said during the week that this was the one the Lions would get, that they wouldn't get to 0-15. Actually, bad guess by me. The Lions have one of the worst defenses in modern football history. They've allowed 486 points this year. They've been outscored by 239 points. New Orleans can score. Bad, bad prediction.
Now the Lions have to play the Packers at Lambeau next week. The Pack can put up some points and - given a bleak season in 2008 - they will not want to give Packers fans a chance to feed on their carcass even more violently with a loss to Detroit.
It's looking like 0-16.
As the Arizona Cardinals take a whipping that will sting until March from the Patriots (38-0 and marching to another TD early in the second half), the concern for Ken Whisenhunt has to be that his team isn't mature and strong-willed enough to deal with the minimal success an NFC West title represented.
Last week, Minnesota creamed the Cards 35-14. Minny was up 28-0 at the break. So the Cards have been outscored 59-0 in the first half of the last two games. That's starting slow.
Beyond that, look at the Cards' results since their bye in Week 7.
Loss to Carolina. NFC West wins over San Fran, Seattle and St. Louis in consecutive weeks. Loss to the Giants. Annihilation by the Eagles. Win over the Rams. Annihilation by the Vikings and Patriots.
So the only teams Arizona can beat are the horrible teams they know well from the NFC West. Meanwhile, Arizona's going to the postseason while the Patriots are, more likely than not, going to be watching it on TV.
Kansas City looked like they wanted to mail it in early, allowing 10 Miami points before the anthem singer made it to her seat. But they've since rebounded and have claimed a 21-17 lead over the Fins. Yet the Fins are challenging again. Meanwhile, the Cardinals have indeed quit in their game at New England, trailing 28-0 before the break. Not a lot of moxie from the Cards.
But hey, they won the West!!!!!!!!!
On first-and-goal from the Titans 3, the Steelers lost a yard with a handoff to Willie Parker. On second-and-goal from the 4, they lost three with a handoff to Willie Parker. On third-and-goal from the Titans 7, Ben Roethlisberger was flushed, took off and got to the Titans 1 where he fumbled.
No points for you!
Titans ball with loads of time left in the first quarter.
In a game that matters not a whit to them, Kansas city allowed a 60-yard kickoff return to Patrick Cobbs to begin the game and then, on a reverse to Ted Ginn, allowed a 31-yard touchdown.
The Chiefs just aren't the same without Carl Peterson.
As I got into earlier this week, this has been an weird but ultimately compelling season thanks to the chaos.
Today, it may well hit its crescendo. A lot of hearts are going to soar and be broken today.
A quick primer to the day.
THE EARLYS
New Orleans at Detroit: By 4:15 eastern, the Lions could be the most relieved team in football or the most demoralized. If they don't beat the Saints, they will be 0-15. Nobody's ever gotten to that record. Making atters worse, the Lions are taking the field today with a number of players - including quarterback Dan Orlovsky - battling the flu.
Arizona at New England: The Patriots are bailing water on a sinking dinghy. Thanks to the Ravens win over Dallas, the only way they're getting into the playoffs is if they win the AFC East And they are currently third in that race despite being tied with the Jets and Dolphins at 9-5 (damn tiebreakers). If the Pats win, they remain afloat. If not, party's pretty much over. Weather cooperated. It's snowing like a mother and the Cardinals don't see much of that in the desert. The Cards need a bounce back themselves after getting devastated by Minny last week. They need to show they aren't just happy to be in the playoffs but are serious about advancing.
Pittsburgh at Tennessee: Oughta be a bloodbath. A game for home field advantage in the AFC. And while it's no guarantee that helps anyone along to the Super Bowl, it's what you fight during the regular season for. Nothing wil be spared. The Titans are home underdogs after losing to the Texans last week. Are the Titans doing a slow fade?
Miami at Kansas City: Means nothing for the Chiefs, plenty for the Dolphins. Miami, like New England, needs to keep pace in the AFC East. It's a staring contest out there.
San Diego at Tampa Bay: The Bucs have to take care of business to get a Wild Card berth. Especially now that the Cowboys have lost. The Chargers - stunningly - remain alive in the horrific AFC West.
A mind-bogglingly bad loss to the Baltimore Ravens by the Cowboys - a performance lousy with the kind of mental and physical breakdowns that have been the hallmark of this Cowboys team - will likely spell the end for Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips.
After a late Dallas touchdown made the score 19-17, 3:50 remained. Baltimore was just trying to get some positive yards and eat some clock by handing off to Willis McGahee. And McGahee went 77 yards off tackle for a touchdown. On the play, defensive tackle Marcus Spears got thrown 7 yards downfield on a double-team block that wound up wiping out linebacker Zach Thomas as well. Then safety Ken Hamlin took a horrendous angle on McGahee and the score was 26-17.
Dallas' offense cobbled together a drive to get it back to 26-24 with 1:33 left and then the Ravens - again looking to eat clock by handing off to 260-pound power back LeRon McClain got an 82-yard run off tackle. On that play, the Cowboys defense shifted so that eight players were to the defensive right of the Baltimore center. From there, Anthony Spencer stepped around a block on the left, giving McClain a seam. Linebacker Bradie James got obliterated by fullback Lorenzo Neal, Hamlin got discarded like a wet overcoat trying to haul down McClain and the final sands in Phillips Dallas hourglass fell out.
Final score, 33-24. On the final night at storied Texas Stadium. Talk about ruining a party.
"Obviously I've never seen anything like that at the end of the game, to have two long runs," said the ever-beleaguered Phillips. "We don’t normarlly give up long runs. It’s hard to explain."
Lemme give it a shot. Undisciplined. Guys trying to do stuff that they're not taught to do, using bad technique and leaving teammates out to dry. General cluelessness at critical points (9 penalties for 81 yards including stupid dead-ball false starts and delay of games). A more determined, well-coached, desperate team playing with abandon (witness the key fake field goal in the second half that set up a touchdown) because - like the Cowboys, the Ravens were playing for their "playoff lives."
Meanwhile, Tony Romo again came up relatively small in a big game going 24 for 45 for 252 yards with two touchdowns and two picks.
"We made a lot of mental errors in this game," Romo lamented.
Week 16's a bad time to be casting about for mental crispness. But that's the 2008 Cowboys.
Romo was asked about expectations for this team not being in line with the results.
He tried to make it sound as if the Cowboys were never a party to the talk of Super Bowls in February.
"The expectations are what you guys write our expectations are," he said in his postgame press conference. "Throughout the year we’ve had different expectations from you guys. At the beginning it was Super Bowl or bust. Then we were left dead, no chance of making the playoffs. Then we start winning again and, 'Ope, they have a chance to go all the way.' Now were left for dead again."
Pretty much.
As Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis said at the game's conclusion, "Close this down. Turn the lights off in this baby."
Dallas linebacker Bradie James just got flagged for unnecessary roughness during a Ravens drive that moved the ball from the Dallas 37 to the Cowboys 22. On the play, Willis McGahee was working toward the sideline and was shoved toward the marker. With his body over the white line but his foot not yet down, McGahee was gently shoved by Bradie James. McGahee was out of bounds but it wasn't as if he established himself out of bounds. Now there's no set guideline that a guy has to have his foot down or anything, I'm just illustrating that James didn't drill McGahee long after he'd gone off the field of play. Anyway, three plays later, the Ravens added a Matt Stover field goal to make it 19-10 and we had another referee's call that impacted the score almost directly to shake our heads about.
So I - perhaps like you - am enjoying a Saturday evening of NFL football watching the game between the Ravens and Cowboys that has enough playoff implications for both teams to be, well, a playoff game.
Baltimore, leading 16-7 in the fourth, is treating it as such. You've got wide receiver Derrick Mason playing with what appears to be a dislocated left shoulder, recovering fumbles, extending drives, catching touchdown passes all while in excruciating pain.
The man's been in the league since 1997, a former fourth-round pick. At 5-10, 192 pounds, he's played in Super Bowls with the Titans, playoff games galore, he was a sensational punt returner early in his career. The guy is 34 and playing with the abandon, selflessness and urgency we - as passionate followers of the league - like to think all the best players do.
And so are the Ravens as a team. In order to get to 16-7, Ravens head coach John Harbaugh dialed up a fake field goal and it worked setting up the score.
On the ensuing drive, the Cowboys were carried by rookie running back Tashard Choice. Play after play the kid made -- Choice and the Cowboys offensive line while the more celebrated Cowboys were dragged along on his back. And then came a play that encapsulated the Cowboys team personality.
On third-and-3 at the Baltimore 33, wide receiver Roy Williams caught an 8-yard pass for a first down. He sprang to his feet, threw two uppercuts and a bolo punch at the air to signal what a tremendous play he, Roy Williams, the 7th overall pick in 2004 and a former cornerstone of the Detroit Lions, had just made.
It was his second catch of the night. Really, the first time I'd noticed him. Half the professionalism or Derrick Mason could make an All Pro of Roy Williams. Or a great teammate of Terrell Owens. But professionalism and being a good teammate are secondary attributes to the Cowboys. How many tickets can you sell? How much sizzle can you bring? Please.
Will Yeatman, the one-time two-sport athete (football/lacrosse) at Notre Dame who is transferring after a second alcohol-related bust, was seen at the University of Maryland football practice on Saturday. Yeatman hails from the San Diego area, which is nowhere near College Park, Md., of course.
It may not mean anything. But the DelMarVa (Delaware/Maryland/Virginia) region is the heart of college lax in this country. The Terrapin football team is preparing to face Nevada in the Humanitarian Bowl in Boise, Idaho, on December 30.
"My name is Charlie Weis, and I'm here to recruit you!"
Something tells me that this week's meeting with Manti T'eo will not go down in this fashion.
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Had a quintessential Manhattan moment earlier this week. There was no hot water in my building, which is always fun in mid-December. But we New Yorkers are a resourceful lot. So, looking like quite the bum, I headed down to my gym, which is located in the basement of this beautiful building, the Time Warner Center. I step into the elevator, unshaven, in sweats, looking quite homeless, and this is the first face that I see. That's correct, Leslie Stahl of the 60 Minutes.
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When Sam Bradford won the Heisman Trophy last Saturday ("BOOMER!"...Simmer down, Mr. Sims), it harkened me back some three decades (Geez, I realize how many readers weren't even alive for this), to the last great Bradford passer seen on ABC in prime time, as the Sooner sophomore was three consecutive Saturday nights recently. Anyway, does anyone else out there recall this frequently recurring scene, about 11 seconds in on the clip?
Cardinals coach Ken Whisenhunt was asked on a conference call Wednesday to explain why his team went belly-up against Minnesota last week. Arizona lost 35-14 a week after winning the NFC West.
So was there a letdown?
"Yes, to a degree. I really think (winning the division) is something we've focused on for almost two years now, last year being our first year and then this year. You devote a lot of time and energy and effort into doing that -- into winning the division. And then when you actually accomplish that goal, you're faced with a letdown. It was something I was worried about last week and mentioned that during the week to the team. I felt like you didn't see indications of that in practice, but obviously we didn't play well and I think our focus in that game wasn't what it had been in previous games. I think it's very difficult -- especially when we did something that had never been done in Arizona, and that's win the division. You have a number of people that are excited, and rightfully so, telling you you're a good team, patting you on the back and it's easy to lose your focus. I think that is what happened to us, to a degree. We also played a good team. That didn't help."
Penn State has announced that it will "provide for the opportunity of Coach Joe Paterno leading the football program through the 2011 season."
That's a pretty sweet birthday present for the man who turns 82 this coming Sunday.
Last Thursday evening ESPN held its annual College Football Awards show down in Orlando, Cabrera. A list of the winners of the various awards, each of which should be given no more credence or credibility than the particular group who bestows each (e.g., the Nassau County Sports Commission, of Long Island, hands out the Mackey Award for the nation's best tight end; what exactly makes this consortium of gents more qualified to determine the winner than two dozen guys at the Buffalo Wild Wings in Littleton, Colo., is beyond me).
Anyway, here is the list of the winners. The interesting aspect of this, and there certainly need not be a one-to-one correlation between statistical leader and award winner, is that only three players on this list also led the nation in a particular offensive or defensive category. They are Oklahoma quarterback Sam Bradford (Heisman Trophy, Davey O'Brien Award/ leader in passing efficiency), who as I type this is ringing the opening bell at the New York Stock Exchange; Graham Harrell of Texas Tech (passing/Johnny Unitas award); and Florida State kicker Graham Gano (Lou Groza award/leader in field goal %).
After the leap (everyone else says "jump", I say "leap"), the complete list of individual statistical leaders in the FBS for 2008 (although bowl game stats now are included, so these are not the final tallies for the season, which is odd). Final note: I'll mention a superlative outing that a player had, but only if it took place against an FBS school:
1. Can Anybody MacGyver Better Than Pittsburgh?
Forget Walt Coleman's intrusion on the end of the Steelers' win at Baltimore. It happened, it's over, move on to digesting a great game. And show appreciation for the 12-play, 92-yard touchdown drive that gave the Steelers that 13-9 win over the Ravens (this guy nailed the score but had the wrong victor). They slammed their collective offensive head against the wall all evening yet, when they had to, they short-slanted the Ravens into oblivion. Adding to the impressiveness of that win is that, this is what the Steelers do in 2008. Snatch victory from certain defeat. It isn't a once-in-a-while thing. They did it the week before against the Cowboys. They did it in an 11-10 win over San Diego. They did it at Jacksonville (26-21), at Cleveland (10-6) and the first time against the Ravens (23-20). It's a sign of a highly-evolved football team, this ability to summon whatever's needed instead of going into the tank when the bread-and-butter is taken away. And it makes Pittsburgh worthy of admiration.
2. Is the Giants Trouble Authentic?
For the second straight week, the best team in the NFL for most of the season was held without an offensive touchdown when it mattered. You can count that garbage-time score against the Eagles if you want, but I won't. The passing game especially looks woefully out of sync. Eli Manning's throwing back-shoulder passes his receivers have no clue he's about to attempt so it looks - on occasion - even worse than it really is. And eight sacks? I mean, Dallas can bring it when they are properly inspired, but that was stupid Sunday night. As head coach Tom Coughlin said, "You go from the fourth or fifth offense in the league to doing very little in two weeks? I'm very concerned." It's all intertwined. Brandon Jacobs is down so they have to throw more. They have to throw more so teams like the Cowboys and Eagles can dial up pressure. Plax is out so they can't make those defenses pay with their best, go git it receiver. Circumstance and the teams they played are what have led to the Giants first two-game losing streak since the start of 2007. Trouble is, with Carolina coming to town next Sunday night, this is about to be a three-game losing streak. It is...authentic.
3. Which Team Is Less Impressive Right Now: Arizona or Denver?
I just can't imagine Mike Shanahan and Ken Whisenhunt signing off on the lack of urgency their teams showed Sunday. Denver lost to Carolina, 30-10. "If you're going to lose a game, you at least want to go into the fourth quarter where it may be a one-possession game or a three-point game," Denver defensive end Ebenezer Ekuban said. "But the way we lost is something you don't want as a team, especially if you want to keep playing in December. We didn't put forth our best effort. And hopefully it's not a domino effect heading into next week." The overwhelming feeling in Denver is that they're missing Champ Bailey. Columnists are begging for his return. That a team can manage 10 points in Carolina or 7 in New England as they did earlier in the year, it's a bigger issue than a guy who covers receivers. An AFC playoff spot will be wasted on them. As for Arizona, what, they think they accomplished something after their first division crown in 33 years. A 35-14 loss to the Vikings. Nice. So they have the NFC West locked up and now they'll mail it in? It will be interesting to see if they bother showing up against New England next Sunday. They should - talent-wise - be able to torture the Patriots who couldn't cover a kitten with a tarp. If the goal was winning the division, terrific, one can understand the Cardinals easing up and treating the rest of the year like a collection of Pro Bowls. If the goal's a little bit bigger, they might want to take things a little more urgently.
4. Does Dick Jauron Deserve To Be Fired?
He had the Bills at 4-0. Now they're 6-8 and out of the playoffs. Sunday, Buffalo burped up a certain win against the Jets. Interestingly - confoundingly - Jauron signed an extension that was agreed to back in late October. I like Jauron. I think he knows what he's doing and I know his players absolutely revere him. And I don't think he should be let go this season. With the fleet of coaches being dismissed, there will be coaches hired this offseason who have no business running a team. The Bills don't want to get into that mess. What they need to do, though, is set specific 2009 parameters and get an apprentice on staff to replace Jauron if he falls flat again in 2009.
5. Lions?
Yep. Against New Orleans. This is the week, baby. Write it down.
I haven't seen a moment of Hugh Laurie ("House!") on SNL yet, so please, no spoilers in the comments section. Thanks.
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I like that Texas's coach-in-waiting/defense coordinator Will Muschamp's first name is "Will", since that allows headline writers to get a double-entendre every time a new job comes available: "Will Muschamp head to Auburn?" "Will Muschamp follow Chizik to Iowa State?" "Will Muschamp accept Obama's Secretary of Defense offer?"
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Syracuse athletic director Darryl Gross passed over no-brainer pick Turner Gill for the Cuse job, and no one can cry, "Racism!" because Gross himself is African-American. We can still ask, "Why?", though. Honestly, Buffalo won five games total in the four years prior to Gill's arrival there. This year, in his third season, the Bulls finished 8-5 and knocked Ball State from the ranks of the undefeated in winning the MAC championship game. How many schools that finished with a worse record than Buffalo this season actually think they wouldn't be better off three years from now with Gill, the former Nebraska QB, at the helm?
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BALTIMORE - Ain't no place like the Ravens press box. Best vantage point in the NFL for us wags, scribes and ink-stained wretches.
Here's some kneejerk thoughts from the 1's (or 10s if you're hailing from the Left Coast).
* The Jets and, to a lesser extent, Miami dodged dum-dum bullets today. The Jets were well on their way to a loss. Then, on second-and-5 from his own 27, JP Losman got strip-sacked by Abram Elam. Shaun Ellis recovered and made a surprisingly nimble 11-yard run into the end zone to make it 31-27 New York. Losman followed that up by throwing a pick to Darrelle Revis and - even though the Bills got the ball back once more after the Jets turned it over on downs - the Bills couldn't move the ball for a reasonable chance at regaining the lead. So the Jets go to 9-5 and the heat which was going to be turned up to wicked freaking hot on Eric Mangini if the Jets lost their third straight, gets cooled significantly. Meanwhile, the Dolphins (a wonderful story for this year's NFL with the exception of the detestable Joey Porter) got past the Niners 14-9 coming up with a fourth-and-10 sack when the Niners were inside their 20. Porter punctuated that play by stripping off his helmet. Fortunately for him it was after the change of possession so the resulting penalty only moved Miami back further for their kneeldowns. Still, call that good fortune as opposed to good planning by the cement-headed Porter who began his day in San Fran taunting Niners tight end Vernon Davis in the pregame. Porter, if he were wise, would simply say that - after all his years in the league, he's got chunks of guys like Vernon Davis in his stool. Miami's now 9-5 as well and New England winds up the loser since they're playing horrific Oakland today and would have moved into first if the other teams lost.
Normally, we wouldn't weigh in on what appears to be a political story, however, we use the multiple launchings of footwear at President George W. Bush while speaking in Iraq to make a few observations.
1) It would appear from the video that President Bush has faced this kind of incoming weaponry before. Et tu, Madame President?
2) If an Iraqi television reporter is able to unload not one, but two size 10s at you and you're the leader of the free world? You might be a lame duck.
3) Muntadar al-Zeidi, a correspondent for Al-Baghdadia television, was the shoe thrower. He is possibly less accurate than JaMarcus Russell.
In August, I asked Jerry Jones flat-out if he wasn't helping slam the Dallas Cowboys window of opportunity with all the attendant foolishness he'd foisted upon his team.
Adding Adam Jones to an already addled team that bonked at the end of 2007. Inviting HBO in to a training camp run by the warm, fuzzy self-described cupcake coach Wade Phillips. Having the highest priced first lieutenant in football, offensive coordinator Jason Garrett, coaching over Phillips' shoulder. And continuing to enable Terrell Owens to act in the selfish way he always has because of his vast athletic talent.
His answer, "A tradition of the Cowboys is for all this visibility to be here. When we've had our greatest teams, when we've had our most successes, that was said in spades. 'We were too visible, there were too many characters, too much attention.' I know first hand, it doesn't impact the play of the players in a negative way. I would almost go as far as to say that it's a positive thing."
It just, well, it just doesn't seem that positive as the Sunday of Week 15 dawns, does it?
The Cowboys are 8-5 and, with their season on the line, Terrell Owens and Jason Witten are almost coming to blows in the locker room on Friday (I'll take T.O., by decision). The problem? Mulitlayered.
The Fort Worth-Star Telegram's Clarence Hill and Mac Engel combined to report that Owens, Patrick Crayton and Roy Williams met with offensive coordinator Jason Garrett to say that they want the ball more. Last week, Romo got a pick returned for a touchdown on a fourth-quarter throw to Witten then threw incomplete to Witten on the game-sealing fourth-down play. So, even though the Cowboys seem fixated on sating Owens' insatiable appetite for the ball in every game plan, he's still not happy when anyone else gets a look. And the Cowboys year-long excuse-making for Owens ("He's a competitor, he wants the ball and we appreciate that...blah, blah, blah") has now empowered the other wideouts to give Romo and Garrett something else to think about when he drops back besides reading defenses and avoiding pass rushes.
The other layer is that Owens has made a season-long hair across his bottom with ESPN's Ed Werder who covers the Cowboys chaos on an almost-daily basis. Every time Werder asks Owens a question in a group interview, Owens snaps, "Next question." What a pro. The basis is Owens feels ESPN demonizes him and Werder's the guy he takes it out on. So now, Pro Football Talk reports that Witten is believed to be Werder's source in the locker room.
And Owens, one would presume, is blaming Witten for telling Werder that Owens was peeved that Romo and Witten meet separately and confer about strategy. That was a story that emanated Thursday.
Owens' comment, "Anything that goes on, I am going to be the scapegoat. I’m trying to figure out how I make the headlines and I don’t even say anything." lends credence to that.
It's real 7th grade stuff and - given that everywhere Owens has been, his narcissism and self-importance have harpooned his team's chemistry, it's no surprise this is how it's going down.
So if this is, as Jones believed in training camp, a "positive" I'd hate to see a cauldron of personalities that would make Jones feel was bad for business.
Now that the Mets have acquired Francisco Rodriguez (almost melodramatic, given the inevitability of it), and JJ Putz (fairly dramatic, or at least as dramatic as dealing for a former closer-turned-setup man can get), here's a wish list of remaining free agents who Omar Minaya should puruse and who he should stay away from:
CALL ME CRAZY
Manny Ramirez - Would it be an absolute circus? Yes. Would they have to overpay? Yes. Is Manny completely out of his mind? Yes. But he's also one of the three best hitters on the planet. And say what you will about the pitching failures of the Mets the past couple of years, but they also didn't have the kind of offense that could pile on and bail out the team when it was needed. He'd immediately make Wright, Beltran, and Delgado more dangerous. You're asking for trouble during the final couple years of the contract, but if he can put them over the top right away, it's worth it. And if he doesn't put them over the top and in 2011 the entire clubhouse feels like Terry Francona did this past year? Well, could it really be worse than what you saw at Shea the last two seasons?
NO CHANCE, BUT WOULD BE NICE
Mark Teixeira - Since the Mets already signed Delgado, this won't happen. But aside from being a lock to hit 30+ bombs and OPS at least .900, hes got two gold gloves and will be 29 this coming year. Love Delgado and what he did in the second half, but wondering if they were a little too quick to sign him.
Jason Giambi - Again, no room at first base and no DH, but he's an OPS monster, a great clubhouse guy, and would continue to dominate the NYC chop scene.
Yet another solid How I Melt Your Mother last night, in which Barney, when distracted by gorgeous blondes in tight red outfits (which seems to be the NESN programming M.O.), simply barks out the titles of "black sitcoms from the 70's and 80's.
"Good Times".
"Diff'rent Strokes".
"What's Happenin'?"
I imagine the writers labored long and hard trying to contrive a way to get "The Jeffersons" into the script. Maybe "The Jeffersons" should be a newphemism for a roll of nickels, which is already a newphemism for something else.
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Also, the "timesies" flashback of Marshall fighting with his two brothers was classic. All it needed to have conformed with my childhood was someone yelling "Pink Belly!" or "Purple Nurple!" and an aquarium in the background. And how funny was it to discover that Marshall had been living in A Different World (a Fight Club household) the entire time.
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One more reason that Notre Dame is fired up about playing in the Hawaii Bowl? With the economy in the shape that it's in, and with newspapers and mags being especially hard-hit (Did you see that the Chicago Tribune filed for bankruptcy yesterday?), there will certainly be a reduced media presence in Honolulu. Our buddy Rothstein of the Fort Wayne Journal-Gazette, who will not be headed to the Pacific to cover this game, pulled a Liz Lemon this morning, saying, "I want to go to there."
Rothstein, channeling Larry Beil: "'Aloha' means I'm not going to Hawaii."
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Speaking of "30 Rock", how 'bout Donna Moss's turn as the Braverman-obsessed ("Braverman!") lass at the high school reunion? Janel Moloney has now pulled off the extremely rare LemonLyman-Lemon exacta, whose degree of difficulty is off the charts.
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Mike Francesa on WFAN yesterday rated every bowl as "Unwatchable", "Watchable", "Good Game" and "Great Game", but he lost me almost immediately when he came to the New Mexico Bowl. After a long pause, contemplating this tilt between 6-6 Colorado State and 7-5 Fresno State , Francesa huffed, "Watchable."
Also, he created a fifth category for the Hawaii Bowl, seeing as how a Catholic school is playing in it on Christmas Eve: "Heresy," sniffed Francesa.
Disagree. Heresy is playing a game on Christmas Day, as the NBA requires teams to do and as the Fiesta Bowl once did (my first bowl game was a Christmas day Fiesta matchup between Arkansas -- coached by Lou Holtz -- and UCLA that ended in a 10-10 tie ... Can you imagine that now? A bowl game ending in a tie? Define "unsatisfying".)
Here are five thingy things about the Hawaii Bowl you might want to consider:
No need to rehash all the arguments for and against a playoff in college football - you've heard 'em all. Just hope that all of you out there who speak glowingly about the bowls are happy with this year's slate:
Jan 1
Outback: South Carolina vs Iowa (who cares?)
Capital One: Georgia vs Michigan State (mildly intriguing)
Gator: Clemson vs Nebraska (who cares?)
Rose: Penn State vs USC (blowout by early 3rd)
Orange: Cincinnati vs Virginia Tech (amazingly unappealing)
Jan 2
Cotton: Ole Miss vs Texas Tech (mancrush on Mike Leach)
Liberty: Kentucky vs East Carolina (zzzz)
Sugar: Utah vs Alabama (just a CLASSIC Sugar Bowl matchup)
Jan 5
Fiesta: Ohio State vs Texas (we've been here with the Buckeyes)
Jan 8
BCS Championship: Florida vs Oklahoma (should be fun)
And that's how your season will conclude. Actually, it's pretty fitting. This season has been pretty lame. Of all the big games, maybe three (OU-Texas, Texas-Texas Tech, and Florida-Alabama) lived up to the hype. So maybe this underwhelming college football season deserves an equally underwhelming bowl schedule.
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Some other thoughts from this weekend:
- I think there were more people in my buddy's apartment than were in Tampa for the ACC championship. When you stretch a conference that far geographically, you're gonna have problems getting any semblance of a crowd.
- BC: nearly unbeatable as scrappy underdogs, extremely vulnerable as favorites. Pretty much a lock to win the Gaylord Bowl, though.
- The SEC Championship game brought back fond memories about what my dad would've said about rooting for either Florida or Alabama: "Too bad they both can't lose."
- I'm really, really, curious about what Juaquin Iglesias said to earn that non-contact unsportsmanlike penalty.
- Notre Dame is being criticized in some circles for agreeing to play in a bowl on Christmas Eve. How dare they disrespect the day before such a religious holiday like that.
Meanwhile, some people are taking Barack Obama very seriously and are pushing hard for a playoff. Check out this site and sign the petition.
1. Cowboys Loss the Clincher for Phillips 86ing?
Swaddled as he was in a massive blue puffy coat, Cowboys coach Wade Phillips looked like he could have just...floated...away...Sunday. And you have to figure the beleaguered Son of a Bum wanted to. With a 13-3 lead and fewer than eight minutes remaining, the Cowboys lost to Pittsburgh 20-13, wasting a tremendous defensive performance and - at least in feel - undoing the good of the past three weeks' results. Now, with the Giants, Eagles and Ravens remaining on their schedule, it's going to be exceptionally difficult for Phillips to usher in a feeling of goodwill. Even though the blame doesn't rest with him for Sunday (at this point, the too many men on the field penalties and play-clock mismanagement are equatable with spilled milk by a 4-year-old. It just happens) he's presiding over a team that will find a way to Plaxico itself in the foot. Tough thing for Dallas, though, is that it would seem some blame for Sunday should ride with Phillips' heir apparent Jason Garrett. A horrendous and undisciplined offensive performance with repeated forces to T.O. You wonder if, with the meddlesome owner and collection of player agendas, any coach could win big with this team.
2. Wes Welker v. Steve Smith...Who Ya Got?
Sunday night, I pimped the candidacy of Panthers wide receiver Steve Smith for MVP. Or at least raised his name. And while I cannot push New England's Wes Welker for the same award,because New England is not one of the league's best teams, it is worth noting that he also belongs in the conversation as being one of the NFL's best targets. On Sunday, Welker had 12 catches for 134 yards and caught a key two-point conversion pass. He's got 96 catches for 1,002 yards with three games. left. And he is - like Smith - listed at 5-9, 185 pounds. I've stood next to both men. I am 5-9, 180ish. I'm bigger than they are. In the two games before Sunday's, Welker absorbed vicious hits. The hit by Pittsburgh's Ryan Clark is the most explosive I can remember seeing (Welker landed on his SHOULDER BLADES). Yet he comes out and has a dozen catches in his next game? And keys a win? This summer, Michael Phelps was coronated by some as the greatest athlete in history. In a mix with Welker and Smith, Phelps isn't even first or second best in athleticism.
3. How Many Head Coaching Jobs Can We Assume Will Open?
Jacksonville now that they are 4-9 after beginning 3-3. Cleveland. Oakland. Detroit. Seattle. St. Louis. There are others that could (San Francisco, Cincinnati, Kansas City, Indy if Tony Dungy decides to step away) but the first six I mentioned are almost certainties based on where the teams are now and the tenor surrounding their franchises.
4. Which Team in the AFC West Has Scored More Points Than Opponents?
Yeah, you're right. It is the Chargers. They've outscored the opposition 324-281 yet are still 5-8. The 8-5 Broncos meanwhile have been outscored 336-316. Denver's the only first-place team that's been outscored this season so far. Which team's the furthest in the negative? St. Louis. They've been outscored by 225 points. The Titans have outscored opponents by 148. Winless Detroit? Outscored by 194.
5. Anyone Else Think The Ravens Are Better Than Pittsburgh?
Seriously. Even though Big Ben pulled one from the fire Sunday against Dallas, I think Baltimore's getting better quarterback play from Joe Flacco right now. Not saying Flacco's the better player, just that he's playing better. And the Ravens running game is more potent while the defenses are a wash. Sets the table nicely for next Sunday's epic, I say. The Steelers are at Baltimore at 1 p.m. in what ought to be a street fight.
Seems as if I've made some new friends in Lubbock.
First, I'd like to give my Day After BCS Bowl Projections (after all, if bloggers can project the bowls from August until early December, why stop now?)
Duck a L'Orange Bowl: Virginia Tech vs. Cincinnati
Glucose Bowl: Utah vs. Alabama
Fiasco Bowl: Texas vs. Ohio State
Chris Rose Bowl: Penn State vs. USC
BCS Championship Game: Tim Tebow vs Unprecedented Level of Hagiography
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On to yesterday's blog ("What Can You Do For Brown?"):
1) 29 comments! Seriously? Now, if all of you will just saunter over to Playboy.com and vote for our fellow blogger/webcastress Tiffany Simons, we may just unseat Colleen Dominguez Hills from the pole position...so to speak. 29 comments, and as EW noted, not one of them from GA. 29 people read this blog?
2) Let me not tarry: Melissa, will you marry me? Honestly, I don't even know anyone named Melissa (which is why I may have a chance with her), but nobody has ever expressed my thoughts better. Melissa, consider yourself immediately deputized into the Johntourage (the membership badge and secret decoder ring will be in the mail). A quick excerpt from her comment: "And if we could all shelf our team biases for just a few minutes and appreciate the college game for what it is - all its faults but more importantly all its unique greatness - we might all be able to agree our passion comes from a system that demands that, and eventually rewards, the teams that bring their best every time their cleats hit the grass."
Melissa, YOUR AWESOME!!!
(In about two hours my mom is going to write telling me that "Melissa" is her new alias. I just know it.)
3) The Lubbockites have a valid point. So let's go over all this and see if we can't find a little resolution. I find this entire conversation between Texas Tech and Oklahoma and Texas (see what I did there? Placing TT first so as to avoid even further charges of bias?) to be not unlike an argument as to which of three religions is the one true religion.
So, before we do anything, don't we have to all agree that the other two religions have a right to their viewpoint? In other words, as my new bride Melissa wrote, "If we could all shelf our team biases for just a few minutes..."
Okay, let's see if we can agree on a few more things:
1) Only two teams can play in the BCS championship game.
2) Someone is bound to be disappointed by not being one of those two teams.
Still with me? The next step, and this is where I believe some of you will jump off the bus, is to assign a hierarchy of values as to the most deserving teams. Here are mine:
1) Best overall record. So how come Utah and Boise State aren't our BCS finalists? Because they don't play a BCS conference schedule and they don't have enough impressive wins to warrant that. I'm all for these teams being able to land more attractive non-conference games and I believe ESPN's programmers will facilitate that as well. But for now let's confine this argument to BCS conference teams.
2) Head-to-head. You can talk all you want about how, for example, Florida would beat Penn State if they played. And maybe they would. But they haven't played. When two teams do play, how can you not give the winning teams credit for that? Here's the point: There is no objectively "better" team. And that is why the entire "season is the playoff" ideal is so appealing to me. The same laundry shows up every weekend, but the same teams doesn't.
I think USC is "better" than Oregon State, for example. But Oregon State beat the Trojans. If the Beavers had beaten Oregon, it wouldn't have mattered how many of us felt the Trojans are the better team. OSU won. And that's fair.
3) Non-conference schedule strength: I never blame USC for the Pac-10 being weak. The Trojans cannot control that. But Mike Garrett and Pete Carroll can control their non-conference slate, and this year USC traveled to Virginia, hosted Ohio State and once again pummeled Notre Dame. Georgia took a risk and traveled to Arizona State (leaving the Deep South for the first time since, what, 1995?).
Of the three Big 12 South teams, Oklahoma played the toughest schedule, hosting TCU and Orange Bowl-bound Cincinnati. Texas Tech deserves props for traveling to Nevada (but Eastern Washington and U Mass? I would have rather seen them play Permian and that California high school, Piedmont, that runs the A-11 offense), while Texas hosted Arkansas and three non-BCS teams of higher caliber than EWU and U Mass).
4) Student Section Signage: I mean, "JORVORSKIE LANE ATE MY OTHER SIGN"? How do you top that? Okay, kidding.
4) Lowest Sum Theory: I wrote about this last week in a column, but I usually find that if you add a team's national rank in two categories (Scoring Offense + Scoring Defense), the team with the lowest sum is the nation's best overall team. At season's end, and yes, Florida, Alabama and OU had to play one extra game against a top ten foe this past weekend, here's how that shakes out:
Scoring Defense Scoring Offense Sum
Florida 5 3 8
USC 1 14 15
Penn St. 4 11 15
Boise St. 3 12 15
Texas 20 5 25
Utah 12 15 27
Alabama 6 30 36
Ball St. 21 17 38
Oklahoma 57 1 58
Texas Tech 68 4 72
A few points on this:
--Yes, Texas, OU and Texas Tech played one another and all three have extremely potent offenses, so you'd expect their defensive numbers to be higher (i.e., worse). Still, it's rare to see a national champion whose scoring defense isn't at least in the top 25 in that category, much less not in the top half of the nation.
--Boise State makes a compelling case for BCS inclusion based on this table. The Broncos needed another Oregon-quality opponent to get there.
--Penn State. If the Nittany Lions had traded in season-opener Coastal Carolina for a legitimate top 50-caliber opponent and still have the same numbers and record, they might have warranted serious consideration for the national title game.
5) Intangibles: Sure, it belongs fifth on this hierarchy list, but you can be human a little. Oklahoma became the first team ever to put up 60-plus points in five consecutive games. You can factor that in, sure. USC has not just the nation's best defense, but arguably a defense for the ages (how many of their starters will be in the Pro Bowl five years down the line?). You can consider that. If Notre Dame wins eight games, sure, you throw them into the conversation.
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With all that said, let's address the Oklahoma-Texas-Texas Tech conundrum (though two weeks earlier, if you were paying attention, I did write that there was "no right answer" to this quandary). Reviewing the hierarchy:
1) All have same record, in terms of losses: 11-1 or 12-1.
2) Head to head: All are 1-1 against one another.
And so this is where I failed yesterday. Do you play musical chairs with the three? Do you try to eliminate one of them first, and then go to a head-to-head matchup between the remaining two, as I did? Or do you continue to evaluate all three evenly?
If you're bleeding burnt orange--or if you're just me--you do the former. But the minute you do that, and then argue that Texas beat Oklahoma (I seem to have noted that once or twice), then Red Raider rooters rightly renounce you because, after all, their troops beat the Longhorns head to head.
And Oklahoma's fans just keep their mouths shut because, after all, they won this derby.
I certainly can understand the argument out of Lubbock. What I opted to do was analyze the mutual games between the trio. And from that, well, a few points that are not up for debate: 1) Texas is the only one of the trio that did not play a home game, 2) The narrowest win belonged to Texas Tech and 3) The worst blowout loss also belonged to Texas Tech.
And so I eliminated the Red Raiders from the argument.
Of course, if you're a Red Raider fan, you're used to Texas getting all the top recruits and their alums having far too much influence in the Lone Star State, and you're chapped (even your chaps are chapped) at the Longhorns getting yet another favor. Besides, you and I know that the Longhorns' invite to the Fiesta Bowl was a complete business decision on the part of John Junker and Co. in Tempe, and you have a right to be irritated (or worse) about that.
Do I believe that Texas Tech couldn't beat Florida in Miami? No. They could win. I just don't think they're more deserving than OU or Texas to have that opportunity. My question to Red Raider fans is this: If you accept, for a moment, my argument that it has to come down to Texas or Oklahoma, which way do you lean?
A few final points before Melissa and I start talking about our honeymoon at the Meineke Car Care Bowl:
1) As I wrote yesterday, I'd love to see USC and Florida because while the Trojans' offense is not quite what it should be, their defense is the one unit that could potentially keep Tim Tebow and Percy Harvin and Louis Murphy and Chris Rainey and Jeffery Demps and Riley Cooper (you get the point) in check. And then there's the entire Emmanuel Moody (a USC transfer) factor, too.
2) We may have just seen the two best teams in the country play in Atlanta this past Saturday. And if you watched the game, wasn't it as satisfying as you'd hope for from a national championship contest?
After building a 13-3 second half lead (despite playng like dog pooh for most of the first half) Tony Romo just threw a dart to DeShea Townsend with 1:40 left that went for a touchdown. Unfortunately, Townsend plays for the Steelers and Romo plays for the Cowboys and the score is now 20-13, Pittsburgh.
And while tight end Jason Witten is taking the blame for running the wrong route on this game-clinching play. Pittsburgh just scored 14 points in less than a minute. With 7:15 left they trailed 13-3.
The Cowboys, who bottomed out at 5-4 then rebounded with wins over Washington and NFC West weaklings San Fran and Seattle had recovered some momentum.
But against the 9-3 Steelers, Romo and the Cowboys offense played horrifically.
Their first seven drives ended thusly. Romo interception on pass intended for Terrell Owens. Handoff (?!) to Owens on third-and-2 and a stop on running back Tashard Choice on fourth-and-1. Three-and-out with third down pass aimed to Owens. Fourth-and-2 incompletion over the head of Owens. James Harrison strip-sack of Romo. Three-and-out. Romo pick on first-down in his own end.
Dallas was lucky to be down 3-0 at that point and Nick Folk banged a field goal to make it 3-3. In the third, Romo pulled a TD out of his posterior with a marvelous scramble and throw to Owens to make it 10-3. They added a field goal but Pittsburgh outgutted the Cowboys.
Romo melted down early and late. There was general confusion on a final Dallas drive on which Romo again threw to an unwitting Witten while TO raged.
The postgame's going to be fascinating.
So the Fighting Irish and Hawaii have a Christmas Eve date in the Hawaii Bowl.
Chances are they won't bill it as "The Battle of the Last Two Schools to Get Waxed in the Sugar Bowl". Or, "Come See the Teams That Allowed the Most Sacks in 2007 and 2008". And that's not all that the Irish and Rainbows have in common. Both have six losses. Both have trouble running the ball. Hawaii is 107th nationally in rushing; their leading rusher, Daniel Libre, averages less than 36 yards per game. Notre Dame ranks 98th in rushing, with Armando Allen averaging 48 yards per game.
Both teams are rather low on quality wins. Hawaii beat two 7-5 WAC foes, Nevada and Fresno State. Notre Dame's highest quality win was against 8-4 Navy. Common opponent? None.
The Warriors, as noted, allowed a nation's worst 49 sacks this season in 13 games (the Irish set the NCAA record last season, allowing 58 sacks in 12 games). Hawaii is also last in the nation in punt returns, and so the absence of Mike Anello (cracked bone in his leg) won't be as deleterious to the Irish.
The Warriors are yet another Irish foe whose quarterback is not the same one who started most of the season. Inoke Funaki was the starter for most of the season but now Greg Alexander, who last year was playing at Santa Rosa Junior College, has been the starter the past five games (Alexander was also the sacrificial lamb for UH's season-opening 56-10 loss at Florida).
Charlie Weis has to love this matchup, and of the five potential bowl sites that a 6-6 at-large Notre Dame could have concievably found themselves, none is more inviting, more, um, pacific, than this Pacific paradise. It's an ideal passing climate, and Jimmy Clausen and his receivers should thrive, especially if Michael Floyd is back in time.
With the Cowboys and Steelers locking up today in a battle of import at Heinz Field, a glance back at some moments and characters from THE interconference rivalry of the 70s and
1. Thomas "Hollywood" Henderson
From 1975-79 Henderson was all the color the staid Cowboys needed or could stand. Before the Cowboys and Steelers met in Super Bowl XIII, Henderson said Terry Bradshaw couldn't spell cat if you spotted him the "c" and the "a". Henderson took a critical penalty in that game that appeared to agitate Franco Harris. Harris soon after scored a touchdown and Henderson, soon after, was out of the NFL. Henderson plunged into drug and alcohol addiction but has re-emerged as a positive dude.
2. Jackie Smith
In the third quarter, with the Cowboys trailing Pittsburgh 21-14 of Super Bowl XIII, Roger Staubach looked for the veteran tight end who authored a Hall of Fame career. Firing a dart into the end zone, Smith tried to slide to gather the ball into his chest. It made the play tougher than it had to be and the ball ricocheted off Smith's chest incomplete. As play-by-play man Verne Lundquist said on cue, "Aw, bless his heart, he's got to be the sickest man in America." The Cowboys settled for a field goal. Smith's drop has been overblown by history. That Dallas couldn't come back from 21-17 after that field goal is absurd.
3. Tony Dungy
His original incarnation was as a cornerback for the Steelers. In 1979, Dungy was a bit player for Pittsburgh who was having a mostly nondescript Super Bowl until the fourth quarter when, after a late Cowboys TD, he failed to handle the ensuing onsides kick. Dallas went on to score a touchdown to narrow the score to 35-31.
4. Larry Brown
He must wake every morning, wherever he is, and thank Neil O'Donnell. In the 1995 Super Bowl, O'Donnell threw a pair of picks to Brown. And when I say he threw them to Brown I mean DIRECTLY TO HIM! Brown went on to become Super Bowl MVP then, as a free agent, signed a fat deal with the Oakland Raiders. He played a dozen games for Oakland before returning to the Cowboys for one more season. Were it not for those picks, Pittsburgh was in position for a pretty sizable upset.
5. Randy White's Fumble
Again back to Super Bowl XIII when Randy White, the Hall of Fame defensive tackle actually blundered in more spectacular fashion than the aforementioned Jackie Smith. After Franco got steamed and scored on a 22-yard trap play to make it 28-17, White fielded the ensuing kickoff with a cast on his left arm and either tried to tuck the ball or lateral it. Neither worked. He fumbled, Pittsburgh recovered and Bradshaw hit Lynn Swann for an 18-yard TD on the next play.
With less than a minute left in the first half, Daunte Culpepper just tried to pick up a first down on fourth-and-1 at the Vikings 6. He didn't make it as Kevin Williams (he, one of the Vikings happy recipients of a Starcaps injunction) squished the play.
So instead of being up 9-3 or better heading into the half, it's 6-3 Detroit as they try to avoid going to 0-13. Tarvaris Jackson took the knee for the Vikes on the final two plays of the half. Gus Frerotte's whipped two first-half interceptions.
That's Brown as in Mack Brown (not Brown as in Joe Paterno's alma mater), who will likely end the day as the least gruntled football coach in the country. And with good reason.
Texas beat Oklahoma. Let me repeat that. Texas beat Oklahoma. Yes, the Sooners have scored 60-plus points in five consecutive games, and they ought to send a bouquet of flowers (but not roses) to ABC for putting them on in prime-time the last three Saturdays. But they lost to Texas. And if that isn't the deciding factor, then why should a BCS game versus Florida be the deciding factor?
If Texas beat OU and has to stay home, then why doesn't Alabama get to play in the BCS championship game ahead of Florida? Just so we're straight here among the one-loss entities:
1) Florida beat Alabama. Both teams reside in the SEC. So Florida goes to the BCS Championship game.
2) Texas beat Oklahoma. Both teams reside in the Big 12. So Oklahoma goes to the BCS Championship game.
Please explain the logic of this to me.
One word: timing. That's what this is all about. The Gators defeated the Tide yesterday. The Longhorns beat the Sooners on October 11th. We've gone from Palin to Plaxico since then, and Harris Poll voters (as well as FBS coaches) have very short memories.
But what if--as I type this, we are eight hours shy of hearing the BCS standings-- Texas actually finishes 2nd in the BCS standings? Would anyone have a legitimate beef against a program whose very mascot is beef?
Take a look at the numbers. He's the best player on a 9-3 NFC South-leading (OK, tied) Panthers team. His performances in big games? Off the charts. Check it out. Atlanta games - 6 for 96 and 8 for 168. Tampa and New Orleans in back to back weeks - 6 for 112 and 6 for 122. Against Arizona - 5 for 117. His quietest games were against his worst competition - 1 for 9 against the Raiders and 6 for 63 against the Lions.
It opens up the discussion, though, of whether or not a guy who got suspended by his team for the first two games for whacking around teammate Ken Lucas can also be the most valuable player. Hmmm. It is a wide-open MVP field at the moment. Can Smith be considered? Discuss.
Hey, this got surprisingly little play. That weird fine that Dolphins linebacker Channing Crowder got for having Matt Light give him the "how many lumps would you like?" treatment (3:15 on the video starring Pete Puma)? The one from two weeks ago when it seemed Light did all the pounding and Crowder did all the receiving? The racist nature of Crowder's comments were what precipitated his ejection, his fine, and the relative wrist-slapping that Light got.
Florida Sun-Sentinel columnist Dave Hyde writes that "Crowder and Porter went over the NFL-drawn line by spewing racial venom and attacking an opponent's family, according to sources. The specifics? Well, they were listed by two sources and won't make the family newspaper."
Crowder's teammate, Joey Porter, is the one to whom Hyde refers. Joey got fined $7,500 for his mouth.
It's weird, I didn't really hear it reported until seeing Hyde's column that Crowder said something racial in nature.
Notes from the first Saturday spent at my apartment since July...-
--First, an observation. Nothing seems to matter more in college football than last impressions, and no one is being more victimized by that than Texas. If Tim Tebow wins the Heisman Trophy, I cannot argue with that. He is an amazing athlete and a true leader and as he himself joked to Gary Danielson and Vern Lundquist, "I really would like to throw against some of the defenses in the Big 12."
And, of course, Tebow has a vote (how awesome if he wins by one vote?).
However, Colt McCoy has better statistics in almost every meaningful category. Plus, McCoy leads the Longhorns in rushing as well. When Texas lost its only game of the season, the defense was on the field for the two deciding plays of the contest at Texas Tech (Blake Gideon dropping a sure interception, followed one play later by Michael Crabtree's amazing TD catch-and-release with 0:01 left). When Florida lost to Mississippi, Tebow was on the field for the deciding play, failing himself to run for a first down on a decisive fourth-and-one.
It isn't that Tebow is not deserving. I just think that McCoy deserves it more (just as I believe Texas deserves a spot in the national title game above Oklahoma). And what I don't understand is how so many of the talking heads and pundits just seem to accept the fact that the team or player whom they are impressed by last (the Longhorns do not play this weekend...though that's not their fault, by the way) is the one who is more worthy. There's no logical basis for that.
Okay, enough fulminating from me. On to the afternoon wrap-up:
--Army is wearing camouflage helmets and pants versus Navy and it's still not working. I phone my Mystery Science Theater 3000 partner, Charles Davis, to inquire about this. "Next year they may have to go with Harry Potter's invisible cloak," he says.
"Next year," I say, "I wanna see them with shrubbery on their helmets, like the snipers wear."
--When did Dennis Haysbert become James Earl Jones? All-State ads, SEC montages. He's everywhere.
--Navy outscored Army 17-0 in the first half, when President Bush sat on the Cadet side. Navy outscored Army 17-0 in the second half, when Bush sat on the Midshipmen side. So don't blame him.
--Kevin Craft's license plate should read "UCLAINT". I always wonder how USC back-ups Mitch Mustain and Aaron Corp feel when they watch the other school's quarterback. Those two could start at about 110 of the other 119 other FBS schools. If not more.
--Tim Tebow's eyeblack refers to the biblical verse Phil 4:13 ("I can do everything through Him who gives me strength"). Or he could have just written "Mickey" under his right eye and "Marotti" under his left.
--The irony, Vern Lundquist, is that of all the postseason awards that Tebow might win in the coming weeks, The Bronko Nagurski Trophy (Best Defensive Player) is not one of them.
--How much do you love Vern, by the way? As the camera panned toward Tim Brando and the CBS crew prepping for their halftime show, Vern said, "Looks like they're rehearsing their ad-libs."
1. 'New' Cowboys First Real Test
Since droppng to 5-4 with that head-caving they took from the Giants on November 2, the Cowboys have beaten Washington (nice), the Niners (meh) and the Seahawks (also meh). At 8-4, they have engendered much giddiness among their fanbase. Yet they're still a whisker behind the Falcons in the race for the final NFC wild card and are now traveling to Pittsburgh to face the NFL's best defense (statistically). This is in many ways their biggest game of the season. The Steelers dismantled New England last weekend. They clearly showed that an average quarterback playing well (Matt Cassel) can be brought to Earth with a resounding thud if he's put under enough duress. Now Pittsburgh faces a good quarterback (Tony Romo) playing well. Romo's inclination when under pressure is to refuse to take the sack or negative play and try to make something big happen. That leads to turnovers and points. And with a defense led by legit MVP candidate James Harrison, those plays will arise for Romo to deal with. The matchup I'm going to be fascinated by in this one? Jason Witten and Troy Polamalu.
2. The Starcaps Imbroglio
Frankly, this whole thing's a crock. The NFL knew Starcaps contained a banned substance but didn't share that information with the employees? What's this, the Marion Barry case? Once I hear words like "litigation" "injunction" and "court order" I tend to glaze over a bit. What's pertinent here is that, the injunction granted by Judge Paul Magnuson in St. Paul, Minnesota on Sunday may free up Kevin and Pats Williams to play Sunday against the Lions but if their four-game suspension is ultimately upheld, the tradeoff will be that they miss playoff games now (if they are forthcoming for Minny).
As much hand-wringing's being done over the legal aspects of the case, the only thing that matters to the team and their teammates is the answer to the question: Are they playing or not?
"It's not a distraction to us," said Viking Jared Allen to Minny media. "I mean, not to be jerks, but... you guys are the ones that create the distraction. It's always, 'Oh, we got another question about it. We got another this about it.' We're just playing football. So many circumstances happen through a year that if you get hung up every time (something happens), then we wouldn't be successful.
3. Make or Break for Washington
After looking so good early in the year, the Redskins have faceplanted. On NBC's Sunday Night Football, they have precisely the kind of defense you don't get right against - the Ravens. Can Jason Campbell and Jim Zorn hatch anything to help a team that's lost four of its last seven? Washington's scored 6, 10 and 7 in its last three games against playoff bound opponents. They're in trouble deep.
For those of you who watched the FSU-UF game on Saturday, you might have noticed the "Did You Know" stat on ABC referring to the true origin of Gatorade. Simply, the graphic said the drink was created by Florida State not Florida. My little brother texted me as soon as he saw it. I'd never heard that one before and was hesitant to believe it. Then Awful Announcing posted this.
Including: "The University of Florida is so concerned about this new revelation that they are supposed to issue a press release later today, perhaps to quell what has become the hottest new smack talk in Florida."
I'm pretty sure their reputation is safe. Gatorade belongs to them. That game was awful, as in 45-15 awful. And rumors have now surfaced about job security for Chuck Amato and Mickey Andrews. Swirling is that both Amato and Andrews will be gone after the bowl game. Again RUMORS but where there's smoke...
"Florida called a throw-back pass from Tim Tebow to tight end Aaron Hernandez in the waning seconds of the first quarter. The play called for Tebow to roll left, stop, turn and throw a pass back to the right to Hernandez, who the Gators hoped would be alone in the flat.
There was risk involved.
The ball floated through the rainy sky for about 30 yards, and if a Florida State defender was alert and nearby, the possibility of a long interception return for a touchdown existed.
However, it turned out perfectly for second-ranked Florida, as Hernandez caught the imperfectly thrown pass and scored untouched.
Hernandez said he wasn't surprised the play was successful.
"We knew we were going to run it because the past few weeks other teams used it against Florida State and it worked," Hernandez said. "We put it in our playbook and it worked."
I've always been a fan of Mickey Andrews, standing on the sidelines, smacking his gum, yelling at his boys. The defense is one part of the Noles game that hasn't completely fallen apart. But maybe it is time... Time for coach-in-waiting Jimbo Fisher to usher in a new staff consisting of the people he wants and needs to get this program back on track.
Or Florida can continue on with their win streak of 8 straight wins against FSU.
Along with that of course, Jimbo, must stay as coach to usher in his new staff.
Just another rumor out there floating around.
The Notre Dame football banquet takes place this evening in South Bend. Joe Theismann will be the speaker (apparently, Jason Whitlock just couldn't free up his schedule in time). I'm curious as to who will be named the team's offensive MVP and defensive MVP. Here are my votes:
Golden Tate....Offense
Kyle McCarthy....Defense (he led the team in tackles, saved the day versus San Diego State [yes, it hurts to type that], and made a TD-saving tackle against Purdue that kept the Irish from falling behind 14-0)
Mike Anello....Special Teams (If Anello is not named a team captain for next season, that'll be a huge disappointment)
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I am not the one who launched this site, by the way.
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Did anyone else catch Rutgers' beatdown of Louisville last night? The Cardinals made Mike Teel and the Scarlet Knight passing game look absolutely Leachian. And this is a unit that is coached by Ron English. I don't know much, but I remember playing safety in high school and hearing this refrain over and over again from my position coach: "Deeper than the deepest."
How many times did Kenny Britt and Tim Brown get behind the Card DBs last night? Mike Teel had seven touchdown tosses and 447 yards on only 21 completions. That's a TD pass every three throws, and more than 20 yards per completion.
The Raritan Gang, who began the season 1-5, finish up 7-5. They're the anti-Irish of 2008. Greg Schiano's stock has risen way up in the last six weeks, and deservedly so.
Charlie Weis officially launches his "What Have You Done For Me Tomorrow?" phase with today's news that he will be retained by Notre Dame. When we cornered athletic director Jack Swarbrick on Saturday night at USC following the 38-3 loss to the Trojans, he spoke as if every coach in South Bend is evaluated at the end of the season similarly. Swarbrick joked that even his head women's soccer coach, Randy Waldrum, is subject to a review "and he's headed to the Women's Final Four next weekend."
Maybe every coach is subject to review, but don't expect to read a statement from Swarbrick any time soon that Waldrum has been retained for next year. In other words, there's no need to release a statement to say that a coach who is doing an outstanding job and is under contract is returning.
No, you only do that for coaches who are having a difficult time convincing recruits that their job status is not in jeopardy.
I'll have much more about this in a column later on, but here's a quick tease: Notre Dame, in Charlie Weis's first two seasons, had seven 100-yard rushing games by an individual in each of those years. Last year they had four 100-yard rushing games by an individual. This year? Just one.
That is pathetic. Offensive guru or not. If you cannot run, you cannot win.
Doug Flutie, on "College Football Live", gently noted that in just about every game Notre Dame plays the other side is more physical. Absolutely. Notre Dame is not nor has it ever been a "nasty" football team under Weis. That needs to be rectified immediately.
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On the front page of this site right now, the lead story is an argument by our Joey Johnston that Tim Tebow "has earned" the Heisman Trophy. I must disagree. And I think we all know how much I love Tebow Steaks. Here's my main issue, among many: Johnston argues that ever since UF lost to Ole Miss and Tebow made the following proclamation--
“I promise you one thing. A lot of good will come out of this. You have never seen any player in the entire country play as hard as I will play the rest of the season. And you will never see someone push the rest of the team as hard as I will push everybody the rest of the season. And you will never see a team play harder than we will the rest of the season.’’
--well, ever since then, Johnston asserts, the Gators have outscored opponents by a margin of 344-78.
Fine. Florida lost at home to Mississippi by one point on September 27th.
Two days earlier, USC lost by six to Oregon State in Corvallis.
Since then, the Trojans have outscored opponents 314-49, which is a greater margin of butt-kicking, percentage-wise. In their last eight games USC has shut out three teams and held another two to just a field goal. Does that mean USC quarterback Mark Sanchez should be considered for the Heisman? Or linebacker Rey Maualuga, the leader of the Trojan defense (or Brian Cushing? Or Taylor Mays?).
Sam Bradford and Colt McCoy have higher passer efficiency ratings than Tebow.
McCoy, Bradford and Graham Harrell have completed a higher percentage of their passes.
McCoy, Bradford and Harrell have all thrown more TD passes and have all thrown for more yardage.
Tebow has thrown the fewest interceptions (phenomenally, only 2 in 246 attempts) of the trio, but all three Big 12 South QBs have completed more passes than Tebow has even attempted.
Is Tim Tebow the greatest leader in college football? He may be, but Colt McCoy's supporters can make that argument, too. I love Tebow. Wish so many more people were like him, not just more players. But has he "earned" the Heisman this season? No more than someone from USC has. And certainly not any more than those Big 12 South QBs who, like Tebow, have led their teams to 11-1 records (and lost on the road).
My choice? Colt McCoy, who is also the Longhorns' leading rusher.
As an Islanders fan, I absolutely despise Sean Avery. But as a fan of pro athletes providing constant entertainment, I love him for this quote:
"I am really happy to be back in Calgary, I love Canada. I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about. Enjoy the game tonight."
He's referring to his ex, Elisha Cuthbert, dating Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf. But as my buddy Gregg notes, that is not at all sloppy. The clip of this is even better because of the sophomoric smirk on his face. All class, Sean.
Gary Bettman suspended him indefinitely, which sounds like it's on par with a 4th grader getting sent to the principal's office for making a mom joke.
Regardless, Avery should have bigger concerns. You just don't say things like that about Jack Bauer's daughter and hope to live.
God, it’s so painful
When something is so close
Yet still so far out of re-e-e-ach
--Tom Petty, “American Girl”
On Sunday, Jay Christensen, the man who gave birth to TheWizofOdds.com, offered a video of the final two plays of the 2005 USC-Notre Dame contest, the 34-31 classic in South Bend. Watching that finish now, the scene of Irish head coach Charlie Weis walking out onto the field after the clock had prematurely struck 0:00, his face seemingly asking, “Is it okay to celebrate yet?” is particularly poignant.
Forty-three games later, his record in those contests a mere 24-19, Weis, his staff and players have not come close to tasting the type of glory that eluded them by a mere few seconds on October 15, 2005. If Weis is fired in the coming weeks, I think that memory, those few moments that changed everything (USC had faced a 3rd-and-19 just a few plays earlier), will always haunt him.
Understand, that loss is not responsible for Notre Dame’s middling record since. But, as one friend noted on Saturday night, it sure would have been interesting to see how a 31-27 Irish win that day might have altered the future.
"Stupid thugs. People behaving like that with guns."
And you thought the only Hyman Roth quote that would stand up 34 years later was the "this is the business we've chosen" rant?
Actually, the predictable moral crusade about athletes having guns really shouldn't be the main issue with this Plaxico Burress situation (although good job by Mad Dog bringing up Plax' "taking my kids to school" quotes and blasting him for not exactly being Father of the Year for hanging out at a nightclub at 2 am). The gun thing is really a political issue, and as Tiki Barber pointed out, most of us have no idea what a lot of these guys dealt with growing up and what sort of personal safety fears they have. To make a blanket statement like "they shouldn't carry guns" isn't really fair.
What I want to know is: Why aren't more people (other than Jon Stewart), making fun of the fact that this dude was out at a club wearing sweatpants? SWEATPANTS!
I've said it before: what a league.
The highlight of an otherwise forgettable game between AFC South disappointments Houston and Jacksonville could have been the halftime interview with Plaxico Burress' agent Drew Rosenhaus. It wasn't.
Rosenhaus talked in generalities, tried to put a happy face on a dire situation for his client and evaded point-blank questions about Burress in particular and NFL players in general carrying guns.
A portion of what Rosenhaus said..."I was with him last night. He's doing remarkably well considering he was shot. This is a very tough experience for him."
Rosenhaus said Burress would report to the Giants complex Tuesday to get treatment. The agent added that the Giants have been "remarkably loyal" to Burress so far and went as far as to say the team isn't even asking about Burress' football playing future or his contract, just showing concern for how Burress is feeling.
The cynic in me says that Rosenhaus is putting a rosy spin on things regarding the Giants approach to Burress so that the public might in turn temper its response to the lanky moron. Also, if Rosenhaus makes the Giants seem benevolent now, it may make them more hesitant to be Draconian later. Better than saying the Giants are being dinks about the whole thing so far.
Oh, yeah...the Texans lead Jacksonville 10-0.
I am an expert on bad football.
Notre Dame is bad.
Even from section 11 in the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum on Saturday night, about 60 rows up there in the southwest corner of the old stadium, that much was all too plain: Notre Dame is really bad.
It's not just that USC is really good, with far too many athletes and way too much speed. The outcome of the game -- which I went to for fun, with a 16-year-old junior in high school who's looking at colleges, the two of us guests at a first-rate USC tailgate and the game -- was never in doubt. The only issue, as the game went along, was whether Notre Dame was ever going to get a first down.
That's bad.
And for Notre Dame, that's completely preposterous and wholly unacceptable.
For college football, that's completely unacceptable, too. The college football landscape is better when Notre Dame is better. Like it or not, that's fact.
We can all like it or not. But it's fact. And that's why anyone who cares about college football should want Notre Dame to excel each and every year.
I'm not saying Notre Dame ought to go 12-0 every year. That would be insufferable. But Notre Dame ought to be a legitimate contender each and every season. There's no excuse.
Disclaimer: No one at NBC, the television network that carries Notre Dame games, is making me write this.
Disclaimer No. 2: I went to Northwestern. As a fan, I have less than zero affection for Notre Dame football.
My freshman year in Evanston, the very first football game I ever went to at Dyche Stadium, as it was then called, Notre Dame drilled the Wildcats, 48-0. (1992: ND, 42-7. 1994: ND, 42-15. Etc., until 1995, when Northwestern beat Notre Dame en route to the Rose Bowl, the last time the two schools played -- take that, Irish).
During my four years at Northwestern, the Wildcats won three games. Not three wins per year. Three wins overall. Thus my college years served me well in understanding, truly understanding, a lack of physical talent combined with bad schemes plus unimaginative coaching -- all the ingredients on display when watching a bad football team.
All of that was there to be seen Saturday night in the Coliseum. USC won, 38-3. Brutal.
Frankly, I expected better. Last year, I covered the Notre Dame-UCLA game, a 20-6 Irish win, Notre Dame's first victory after an 0-5 start. Notre Dame was bad, UCLA was worse (topic for another day: how is it that UCLA can't recruit a quarterback? I mean, how is that possible?). Obviously, Notre Dame has more wins this season than last. Doesn't matter. Sitting there in the stands Saturday night, I didn't see any significant improvement in this year's Notre Dame team over the squad I saw last year.
Indeed, I saw decline, and that decline can be measured in two particular Saturday night stats:
One is Notre Dame quarterback Jimmy Clausen's line: 11 of 22 for 41 yards and two interceptions.
That's bad, especially for a young man who has considerable talent.
The other is the plain fact that Notre Dame couldn't even get a first down until the last play of the third quarter.
That's not just bad, that's awful, and that's inexcusable.
Something's got to change. I think we all know what it is.
The Northwestern fan in me would love to see Charlie Weis stay on.
The college football fan in me says Notre Dame must be better. Like, as soon as possible.
1. Should That Ryan Clark Hit on Wes Welker Been a Flag?
Yes. For one reason and one reason only. He left his feet to deliver it. That's launching and it's illegal. But Ed Hochuli and his crew didn't whistle him for launching, instead they whistled him for unnecessary roughness, an unnecessary hit on a defenseless receiver.. And rough as the hit was - I've never seen a guy get folded back onto his helmet from an upright position - it was within the rules because the ball had been tipped but it was not past Welker when Clark delivered the hit. This is the second massive hit Welker's taken in as many weeks. Receivers have a finite number of hits like that that they can absorb before their body or mind rebels. It will be interesting to see if Welker is nearing it.
2. Should We Scratch the Chargers and Packers?
Yes. Green Bay's 5-7. The Chargers are 4-8. Neither team is going to win its division. Neither team is going to qualify as a Wild Card. These are teams that each played in their respective conference championships last year and now they will be on the outside looking in? Fallout? Minimal. Because they played in their conference championships, goodwill has been purchased. But the heat in Green Bay on Mike McCarthy and Ted Thompson is going to be significantly higher than it will be on Norv Turner and A.J. Smith in San Diego. That's because Packers fans actually pay attention to their team whether they're winning or losing.
3. Crennel Needs Loaves and Fishes?
ESPN's Chris Mortensen is reporting that Browns head coach Romeo Crennel needs a "miracle finish" to retain his job. It says here (yes, right here where you're reading) that even if Romeo walks on Lake Erie, he's going to get pink-slipped. With Ken Dorsey running the offense now that Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn are on ice for the year, a miracle finish on the field isn't in the offing. And while the disappointment of not getting to see it through in Cleveland will be a regret of Crennel's, he'll happily say good riddance to the middle school backbiting in the Browns Mickey Mouse front office and ownership levels.
4. Bigger Surprise: Cowboys or Colts?
Colts. By a lot. The Cowboys had the talent and schedule breaking their way when they hit rock bottom in their 35-14 loss to the Giants on November 2. But they had a bye, they had Tony Romo returning and they had back-to-back games with the Seahawks and Niners. The Colts? They were 3-4 and had to play New England, Pittsburgh and San Diego as part of their next five. Well, they won them all and - despite being left for dead - are in the driver's seat for an AFC Wild Card. Good stuff. Without the drama.
5. What Happened to LT?
Age. Fire in the belly. Lorenzo Neal left. Injury. Really, it's a mysteriously rapid decline for a player who was fast-tracking to the Hall of Fame two years ago. Will he, can he rebound (and this year seems too late for that)? Yes. Because he still does have the breathtaking acceleration when he sees a seam. But he's a sensitive guy and it will be interesting to see if he turtles because of this or rallies.
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